Forever Alone

They were making you go out tonight on a blind date. Were they crazy? Obviously they are high or something or they aren’t thinking straight. The question is why are they doing this to you. They wanted what is best for you and this blind date was probably their reason for wanting what is best for you. You stared at them partly pissed off. You were also felt loved because they were looking out for you. They were good friends after all.

“So who is this guy?” you asked

“Well, he is a friend of a friend,” Bridgette answered hoping to make it complicated for you.

“How did you know I wanted to go on a date?” you asked

“You have been moping around about Niall that we needed you to go out,” Rachel answered.

“Rachel, that is just between us,” you muttered while glancing at Louis.

“Trust me Jude, I knew about you moping about Niall. I know you like him. I just don’t get why you didn’t take him for yourself,” Louis looked at you.

“Can we talk about this in private?” you asked Louis.

“Sure,” he answered.

You led him into your room. Rachel and Bridgette knew the real reason yet you didn’t want to repeat it in front of them. You didn’t want to get over emotional again like you did before. You didn’t want them to ask any further questions. Plus you knew that Louis won’t say anything to anyone. Louis sat on your bed and you sat next to him.

“So why didn’t you take him all for yourself?” he asked

“Well, it’s a long story,” you told him.

“We got all the time in the world,” he laid down on your bed.

“You got to promise you won’t tell anyone. And I mean ANYONE,” you looked at him.

He lifted his head up so he could see you, “I promise.”

“Well, Bridgette and Rachel are the only two other people who know about this. But before I came here I had a bit a trouble,” you told him.

“What kind of trouble?” he asked

“I had an ex-boyfriend who was no good to me and he hurt me,” you told him, “He hurt me physically, mentally, and emotionally. I checked myself into rehab and I got better.”

“So are you better now?” Louis asked

“Yeah, more or less. The reason behind me not wanting Niall is that I don’t want him to deal with my past. I don’t want him to feel like I was some charity case or nut case that needed someone to look after them. I am capable of taking care of myself. I never got to the point of wanting to kill myself,” I answered.

“I’m sorry Judith,” Louis looked like he was about to cry.

“I’m fine Lou. I am. I came here because it was the best thing for me. I had to get away from my old life and try to start a new one,” you told him.

“Judith, Niall would’ve shown you that you are worth it. He is a caring individual and he would make you feel loved not because he felt sorry for what happened to you but because he truly does love you,” Louis answered.

“But, he has Donna now,” you blurted out.

“Yeah and I think this guy you are going on a date with is going to like you for you,” he smiled.

“Thanks Lou,” you told him.

“I’m glad you told me. I promise I won’t tell anyone,” he answered.

“So what do we do now?” you asked

“Well, we get you ready for your date tonight. We got five hours to make you look stunning,” he smiled.

“Let’s get to it,” Bridgette came through the door.

“I guess I will never get privacy,” you laughed.

“Nope,” Bridgette wrapped you in a big hug and then Louis and Rachel joined in.

Louis untangled himself from the hug, “Now let’s get her ready for her date.”

“Please don’t make me look ugly,” you joked.

“Trust me you are already ugly,” Bridgette laughed.

“Good that’s what I was going for,” you slapped her.

“Enough chit-chat let’s get her ready,” Louis got up and walked into your closet with Rachel to find your date outfit.

Hours have passed and your friends found your date outfit. You had a few minutes to yourself until your date was supposed to arrive. You stared at your reflection in the mirror. You were wearing a flowy blue dress that sat just below your knees. You were wearing a pair of your sparkly silver flats. Diamond earrings dangled from your ears. They were your grandma’s. On your wrist sat a bracelet your dad had given you for graduating high school. You were also wearing Mark’s necklace that he had given you. Your hair was in a tight bun but there were a few strands that were curled to perfection. You had a light coat of makeup. This was the first time you really enjoyed looking at yourself. You touched your stomach were the scar was. This was the first time you were going on a date since Steve. You were nervous now. What if he was like Steve? What if he was worse than Steve? Bridgette then called your name and you took one last glance at yourself.

You were going to do this. You were going to face your fears and go on a date again. All guys aren’t like Steve. There were good guys out there. You just got to find them. Maybe this guy was going to be one of them. Maybe he was going to win your heart. Maybe he was going to make you feel like your life was worth living. Maybe you won’t end up alone.

You shook Steve and his harmful ways out of your mind and checked yourself one final time. You turned towards the door and headed down to the living room. You walked out to the front door where Rachel, Bridgette, and Louis were standing. Standing behind them was your date. They moved off to the side and you and your date’s eyes met. He smiled really big. He must think that you are beautiful. You walked over to him.

“Hi,” he struggled to get out.

“Hey,” you answered.

“I’m John,” he told you.

“I’m Judith,” you replied.

“Well, are you ready Judith?” he asked

Were you ready to do this Judith? Were you ready to go back onto the market and date guys after all that has happened with Steve? What if something bad happens? Don’t you want to live with me forever? We can be alone together forever. Judith are you sure you want to do this? Are you certain you are ready?

“I’m ready,” you smiled at him.