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Mibba

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My Judgement's Clouded

You're givin' me a heart attack

After Liam had stormed out it felt weird staying in Harrys room. After the information he had laid on me I didn’t know how to react at all. It just couldn’t be true that Harry was in love with me… But the more I thought about it the more I realized that it must’ve been true. It was just so surreal. I walked out of Harrys room and got a little indecisive to where I should go. I didn’t want to face the boys, Harry, right after learning that fact. I looked to my left and saw the remaining doors and decided that I should explore them. I walked towards the door that was closest to me, that one was on the other side of the corridor. Right when I was about to open the door when someone’s voice made me jump.

“You did what?” The voice belonged to Harry and it was getting closer. Without thinking I pushed open the door and jumped into the room, holding my ear to the door to listen.

“She deserved to know Harry!” Liam was also there and by the hear of it they were talking about me. Liam had probably burst into the living room looking really angry and the boys had probably demanded an answer.

“It was not in your place to tell her!” Harry was scream-whispering at Liam and it sounded threatening.

“Harry relax, mate.”

“Don’t call me that! You swore not to tell her and still you did!” Harry was screaming now. “How call I be your mate if do that to me?” Liam stayed quiet for several seconds and I almost felt like I could get out of there.

“I am sorry, but she thought that you hated her for not talking to you.” Liam spoke very softly and I almost didn’t hear what he said. My heart started beating really fast and my baby started kicking. The tension in the air was crazy even though I wasn’t even in the same room as the two. I stood there with my ear against the door listening for any sound when I felt my nose starting to tickle. The silence lasted for a minute before I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Even though I’m not the loudest sneezer, you can still hear them. I sneezed and tried to muzzle it in my arm as much as I could. All I could think was, Crap! I really hoped that they didn’t hear me but sadly I was mistaken. I heard footsteps coming towards the door where I was standing so I backed away from it. The door opened and someone turned the lights on. I stood there clutching my belly as if I was about to be attacked. The two boys were just standing there looking at me. Liam looked defeated and Harry looked worried. I felt myself becoming terrified and my breath started to catch.

“Ross…” Harry started speaking but I cut him of.

“I need to leave.” I couldn’t make myself look at either of them so I just stood there waiting for them to respond.

“Ross, please just talk to me.” Harry spoke again and I saw his feet coming towards me. I shook my head and sighed. “I’m sorry you had to find out that way, I just should’ve told you.” I whispered so low that it sounded like it was for my ears only. I looked up at him with sad eyes.

“Why didn’t you?” He looked into my eyes and it seemed like he was searching for something.

“Because I didn’t want to loose you…” His face dropped and I knew he thought back to the last time we spoke.

“You would’ve lost me.” I thought more about what to say. “At least not because of that.” I looked at the floor and felt really guilty.

“Why did you stop answering my calls and texts?” He put his hand underneath my chin and lifted my face up.

“Because it was becoming harder and harder to lie to you.” I looked at him for a long time and finally I sighed. I really liked Harry, but I was afraid. I saw something behind Harry and when I looked it was Liam. He was shaking his head and then he left the room. Was he still angry with me?

“Ross.” Harry spoke and I snapped my head back in his direction.

“Liam said you weren’t the only one in the group that was in love with me, who did he mean?” Harry looked away from my gaze and suddenly found the floor extremely interesting. “Harry…” I spoke his name softly and lifted his chin. When his gaze met mine again he sighed and shook his head.

“Isn’t it obvious?” I shook my head in confusion. “Well to start Liam isn’t just staying because of the baby, he is staying because of you.” I gasped and shook my head in disbelief.

“Why… I just don’t understand why.” I sighed and backed away from Harry, sitting on the bed that was in the room.

“You always want something you can’t have, right?” I looked up at Harry and smiled a little. Those exact words were what I had said to him when I told him I was in love with someone out of my reach. The fact that it now turned out that the person in question actually liked me back wasn’t relevant.

“Right.” I caressed my belly and sighed. What a bloody mess.

To do a quick recap it turned out that the father of my child was in love with me and it also turned out that my best friend was also in love with me. The best friend that I had a secret crush on a couple of months ago. Why couldn’t my life be a little simple, I am not saying that its difficult to have two members of One Direction in love with you, it is just complicated. I thought back to the time when I was in love with Harry. I had been talking to him for a couple of weeks and we had talked pretty much every day. One day he called me in the middle of the night and woke me up. When I answered he was sitting in a bright room, they were in USA at that time, and he looked really tired. He sat in front of the screen almost falling asleep when I told him to log off and get some rest. He dismissed my words and said I was more important. We spent that night talking for three hours about everything and nothing and it was then I realized I was utterly in love with him. Of course I didn’t think he could ever like me back so I never said anything. And because of the fact that I was in love with the bastard it made it extremely hard to ignore him when my belly grew. It broke my heart to see him so happy the last we spoke and to know that in a week he would realize I didn’t want him in my life anymore. It didn’t make the matter better when our shirt arrived two days later.

“I still have it.” I spoke softly and realized I had stayed quiet for a really long time. He had sat down on the floor and looked up at me with a surprised expression.

“Hmm?” He sounded a little off but I didn’t dwell on it.

“The t-shirt you made for us.” His eyebrows shot up. “I still have it. I slept in it until my belly got to big, it doesn’t fit me anymore.” When I grew out of it I was also heart broken for at least a week after. I wore it a couple of times but I had to have it above my stomach, and that didn’t look pretty at all.

“I thought you threw it away as soon as you got it.” He looked really sad.

“Of course not!” I got on my knees in front of him and grabbed his hands. “Harry I felt awful for doing that to you.” I placed my right hand on his cheek and he leaned into my touch. “I love you, remember darling?” He looked at me and sighed.

“But not the way I love you…” He sighed again, sounding defeated. Is gaze sunk to the floor and he kept it there. I didn’t know what to say. If I told him how I felt before, would he be mad or think I still felt the same way? Did I feel the same way? I looked at our hands and decided it was all or nothing.

“I want to try something Harry.” He looked at me a little confused. Before he could give me a response I leaned forward and gently pushed my lips onto his. At first I didn’t feel him respond but then he sighed and leaned forward a bit. I have to admit that the kiss was the best I had ever had. I sighed and felt myself relax even more. His lips were like silk and felt good against my own. Our lips fit together perfectly. After what only felt like a few seconds Harry leaned back and I kept my eyes closed. I couldn’t dare myself to look at him.

“Ross, I am not mad at you so don’t look so mortified.” I opened my right eye and peeked at him. He was smiling. He placed his hand on my left cheek as I sighed. “That was even more amazing that I’d imagined it.” I opened both my eyes and looked at him with a cocky stare.

“You’ve imagined that in your head, you naughty boy!” I playfully slapped him on his chest and he picked that moment to clasp my wrist. I gasped as his warm hand reheated my hand. I looked him in the eyes and he looked at me seriously.

“How do you feel about me Ross?” I felt myself blush as I kept my gaze steady on his eyes.

Comments

I loved the story. The ending was so cute! :)
Hazza_Fan Hazza_Fan
7/12/13
@thelovelyreader
naaah it's fine I'm just going to be subscribed to it to save the wonderfulness lol
@Amanda_Styles
Naah I mean dislike very much because I ended the story ;)
@thelovelyreader
Well I mean I would never hate you.... Unless I know you o.O lol