“Harry?” Nick snapped his fingers in front of the other boy’s face. Harry snapped to attention the pair of them were in group therapy with a few girls from their wing, all self harmer's, all there to talk about their problem. Harry hated therapy, but group therapy seemed to be more bearable than the one on one sessions that he was always trying to avoid. His therapist was nice, a lovely woman named Caroline but the questions he wanted to avoid, those memories he wanted to block out somehow she had a way of pulling them to the surface just from her greeting of hello as soon as he entered the room.

“What did I miss?” He whispered back at his only friend. Nick smiled and shook his head, signalling that there was nothing worth repeating back to him. The two of them usually mucked about, giving bogus answers, taking the mickey out of their therapist Paul, even though he was only trying to help.

“Harry would you like to go first?” Paul interrupted their conversation with his raised eyebrow. Nick chuckled, hiding behind his hands as he did so, Harry wanted to kick him, he wanted to do it so badly, but he knew that it wouldn’t end well. So many questions would arise from that action.

“Go first at what?” He asked, feeling stupid. Paul always did this, he picked Harry when he knew he hadn’t been listening. It annoyed Harry severely. He must have found it amusing, Harry thought. Otherwise why would he do it so often? It didn’t seem to make any sense to him.

“What are three things you would like to change about yourself?” Paul asked, repeating the question he had already said to the group. Harry smirked as he began brainstorming smart arsed answers but for a reason unknown to both he and Nick he decided to answer truthfully.

“How about the fact that I am gay, I know what people say about me behind my back, it’s not my fault I want to like girls and be turned on my breasts, but I just don’t. I hate the fact that my parents only care about me when I am cutting, I wish I was the perfect son but I’m not. Just one more right? Well I want to be loved, I spent my life feeling unloved and I want to change that.” He spoke with emotion, not daring to look Nick in the eye as Paul’s face changed. The girl beside Harry patted him on the back gently, as if to comfort him.

“Well done Harry. Who is next?” Paul smiled at him sweetly as if to say thank-you for answering. A girl on the opposite side of the circle raised her hand and Harry zoned out once more. He had only been in the hospital for two weeks, that very first day had been the longest. Perrie was a talker, he liked that about her. Harry had a plan as soon as he had met her. He wanted to fall for her, he was trying to make himself love the pretty blonde. She made him laugh, she made him feel good about himself and that was why she was perfect.

“So this button here will send a message to my pager, if you press it three times it will alert the emergency staff, so be careful. They don’t like being summoned for no reason. “ She chuckled, helping him unpack. It was her job to inspect every item he had brought in, to make sure he hadn’t bought in any harmful objects into the facility.
“Right, three times bad. Got it.” He too chuckled, sitting down on his new bed. It was comfortable which surprised him actually. He had expected it to be a horrible mattress adding to the experience that he had imagined to be terrible.

When Perrie had finished unpacking his things, she told him to get off the bed. Harry in all his confusion did what she told him, a smile spread on her pretty little face as she headed towards the door of his room. “I have someone for you to meet.” She explained, leading him down the hallway and into a room. Harry stared at the boy who sat on his bed, reading a magazine. He looked bored, as if he had been doing the same thing for a while.

“Nick, this is Harry.” Perrie introduced, Nick looked up and smiled, closing the silky paged book and placing it on his bedside table. He stood up and walked towards the new kid, offering his hand to be shaken. Harry grabbed his hand, admiring his firm grasp as he shook.

“What brings you here?” He asked causing Harry to shift awkwardly on the spot. He didn’t like to talk about the incident, he didn’t like to admit he had any problems at all. That was what his mother called it. ‘Problems’ as if they were easy to fix, like they were mere kinks in his life. Ones that could be shaken with a blink of an eye. He didn’t have problems he had something deeper than that. He had scars.

“The same as you I am guessing.” He shrugged, trying to act casual as if Nick needed the same bull story to keep him believing that everything were fine, but Nick was different he had the same issues, sure they weren’t identical but they were close enough for him to realize that Harry was still hurting on the inside. He knew then that Harry was the friend he had been waiting for, and Perrie knew it too.

“I’ll leave you boys to it.” She grinned before exiting the room. Nick sat back down waiting for Harry to sit back down beside him. He offered him a mint but Harry shook his head. “So, what do you do here for fun?” He asked with a sly grin.

“People around here don’t really know what that means.” He answered with a small sigh. Nick had been there for months and still found boredom his closest friend. Harry had guessed as much, the hallways didn’t exactly scream excitement.

“We’ll just have to change that.” As soon as Harry said that, Nick knew his stay was about to change and it did. The pair of them soon became closer than brothers, they knew everything about each other, from Nick’s first wet dream, to Harry walking in on his parents when he was 8 years old. They knew the age of their first wobbly tooth, the time they were first taught to drive, or when they had their first girlfriends. Harry told him about coming out and Nick listened. So when it was Harry’s turn to listen to Nick sharing about his abuse, he shoved away all other thoughts. They knew each other inside and out, after only being friends for 15 days.

Sometimes Perrie even joined in with their card games, she’d tell them embarrassing stories about her life and they would do the same.


As soon as therapy finished the two boys raced out, but not before Paul could haul Harry back inside. He walked back in and sat down on the chair that was still warm from his own bum. He looked Paul in the eye, waiting for him to spit out his reasons for making him stay back.
“Thank-you for answering during the session. That mustn’t have been easy for you.” Paul said finally as he sat down in Nick’s previous spot. Harry swallowed thickly, looking into his eyes before responding.

“You asked I answered.” He said swiftly, lacing his fingers together, fiddling his hands were one thing that he did to distract himself. He could never sit still for long.

“You and Nick are close, I can see that. “ Paul pointed out, causing Harry to frown. What was he getting at? Talking about other patients wasn't normal for therapists, they usually wanted to know about you and only you.
“What of it? We are mates.” He said coldly, he wasn't about to start revealing details about his mate, that was just wrong and Paul could never make him do it.

“Just mates?” Paul pressed, he thought Harry had feelings for Nick. He didn't know for sure which was why he was asking. Harry felt his cheeks go warm, how dare he assume that? They were just mates. Nothing more or less. Best Mates.
“Yes just mates, what are you trying to say here? Because I am gay I can’t be just friends with a male?” He scoffed, standing up and heading towards the door. Paul sighed. “It was just a question Harry.” Harry ignored him and ran back out to the hall. That was when he saw Louis for the first time, a thin little stick, that was his first impression. He stared at the tiny boy sitting across the hall with another pretty nurse.

Nick was always joking about the hospital only hiring attractive staff members, and he could have been right but Harry doubted him. Louis looked upset, but without knowing him Harry couldn’t be sure, all he was sure of was that boy looked dead. He was so frail you could practically see right through him, and that was what only made him more and more curious.