My Kind Of Love

Chapter 23 High As We Fly

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYM-RJwSGQ8

**Bea’s POV**

“Who’s the unfaithful one now?” His words echo through my mind as reality hits me harder then ever. I am a cheater.

I quickly shoot up while covering my breasts and snap. “Harry get the fuck off me!” His evil smirk changes to a shocked yet pissed off appearance.

“Why are you mad at me babe, after all you gave me permission to go further so don’t make me look like the fucking bad guy. “ He calmly says while looking down at his cuticles. Showing no interests in this conversation.

“Oh my god! I fucking cheated on Myles with his worse enemy.” I yell while hastily putting back my clothes on. Harry stares the whole time to my discomfort.

Suddenly he looks up his expression angry as he shouts. “It’s not my problem, the fucker deserved it! Why do you care so much for him?” Did I? I don’t think I was even able to answer myself.

“Because I am a genuine person who cares UNLIKE YOU!” I whine while pacing back in forth struggling to tie the back of my bikini.

His expression grows angrier as he grabs me and spins me around, my back facing to him. His cool hands send shivers down my spine as they gently graze my skin trying to grab the bikini string. I feel his warm breath against my neck as he gently ties a knot.

“You think I never cared Bea, you think it was all a bloody game to me?” I say nothing showing him the answer to his question; he takes a deep breath and continues to gently speak. “I know I may have not shown that I did care, but I really did. Fuck like-like I don’t know I am not the type of guy to be all romantic and shit. Look Bea you meant something big to me, I mean you still fucking do!” He was so vulnerable, like a fawn just born struggling to take its first steps without its mother’s aid. He had a hard time expressing his feelings because he never showed them. Always bottled up from the whole world. I realize Harry only used his “bad boy look” as a shield against our fucked up society and that deep down inside he might be a sweet gentle boy.

“Harry you hurt me, you cheated on me!” I surprise myself as I break down sobbing, collapsing. He wraps his big strong arms around me and holds me so tight it hurts my ribcage but I did not care because I missed him too much.

He suddenly releases from our embrace and grabs my cheeks between both his hands and softly speaks. “Bea I did not sleep with her, she came home with me to deliver a package from one of the deals. I mean she did try to sleep with me but I said no, god dammit.”
I pry myself from his hold as I know what he is saying is bullshit but somewhere deep down there inside me, was a part believing him. Tears start pouring down my cheeks as the memories of the site I saw that night in his apartment come flooding back in.

“Don’t play those stupid lies on me, I know how it works!” I cry while pushing him away with my full force but to my disadvantage he doesn’t budge. He just seems to get irritated.

“I am not fucking playing… If I didn’t care about you I would have dumped your ass a long time ago and have fucked 20 sluts by now!” His strong words hit me like a brick falling from a wall. I just wanted to be alone and cry, but I was too embarrassed to fully cry in front of Harry. He exactly wasn’t good with his words but he did have a good point; Harry would have left me if he didn’t have feelings for me.

“Whatever! I am gonna try to find a way out before I strangle you!” I snap while walking away.

He snorts while bursting out laughing. “Is that supposed to be a threat because oh I’m scared as hell!” Obvious sarcasm comes from his voice as he holds his arms up in defense.

While I walk away from him I shoot my middle finger up and I hear him laugh. I didn’t find his humor funny at the moment because I was tore in half by Myles and Harry. I don’t know what to do; I already cheated on Myles. I just wanted to punch myself for letting Harry get to me like that, it’s as if he hypnotized me.

I push away my thoughts as I search for a way out but all the windows were barricaded and no sign of back doors. Suddenly a strange unknown smell fills my nostrils as I see a white cloud of smoke floating above in the air. I snap my head to Harry’s direction as I see him lighting a long cylinder object that is resting between his lips.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I shriek as I go up to him trying to identify the object.

He looks up at me and smirks. “Do not know what a fucking blunt is?” Oh my gosh!

“You smoke weed?” I yell while covering my nose.

He winces from my whining and speaks up. “God dammit in what prude household were you raised in? Relax weed isn’t dangerous if you know how to use it. Plus it relaxes me.” He says calmly while inhaling a big puff and releasing it above our heads. I examine the strange clouds swirling away into the air.

He laughs, as I stay dumbfounded about this whole situation.

“Here” He gently says while inhaling another puff and grabbing my cheeks between his big hands. Bea stop it now! Don’t be stupid! But I choose to ignore the voice in my head and let my guard down.

“Pucker and inhale.” He orders me while coming only a few inches away from my face. Slowly he blows out the white smoke from his mouth and I do as I am told; I pucker and inhale the substance while lightly coughing.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9eectHdEe1req4fno1_500.jpg

Instantly I start to feel calm, relaxed and slightly dizzy. I look up into his eyes and realize he is already staring into mine.

“Can I try again?” I beg while lightly giggling.

“No.” He says sternly while throwing the blunt to the ground and crushing it with his vans. I stare at the smear left on the ground from the damage.

“Why not?” I whine while pulling his arm like a little toddler at a candy shop.

He gazes at me for a while until he softly sighs. “Smoking weed is dumb, not thinking of the things that it can become. It can mess up your brain, your heart and your lungs. We wouldn’t want it to ruin your perfect body, now do we?” His words creep in my mind like a catchy song.

“Then why do you do it?” I question while stepping closer to him and grabbing his arm for balance.

“Can’t you see my life is fucked up Bea? I run the most dangerous business that is out there, I live in anxiety everyday, I am an alcoholic and too top it all off I lost the most precious thing that matters to me. You…” He stammers as if he was about to cry, but I know he wouldn’t.

This was all hard to process as I take the information bit by bit.

I start to yell as I realize one of the things he has said. “You didn’t freaking tell me you were an alcoholic Harry!”

“Because it fucking happened after you broke it up off okay!” He shouts while gripping his hair. A deep groan escapes his lips as he continues. “Bea can’t you see I-I just need to be with you, I want you. Fuck my life is so fucked up without you.”

Without even thinking my body takes over as I wrap my tiny arms around his torso, my head wresting against his chest. The thumping of his heart makes a comforting noise. Tiredness over takes us so we decide to lie down on the cold dusty floor, my head wresting on his chest as he holds me tight in his arms.
His soft lips press against my for-head, then my cheek and finally my nose. If I weren’t so tired I would have kissed him back. He presses me tighter against him as I feel him drift off.

I do not regret anything I did with him and I hated myself for that, it wasn’t fair to Myles. I wanted to be with Harry yet I didn’t want to leave Myles. I was worried for the future.

My thoughts are soon lost and gone as the darkness swallows me up to a restful sleep in Harry’s embrace.

Notes

Hey everybody!

Omg Harry and Bea ahhhh!

Hope you are enjoying the chapters with the music. So PLEASE, COMMENT, VOTE AND SUSCRIBE!!!! kik: Katniss_Peeta!

Love you and and thank you guys <3

-Michaela