Behind Her Smile [Louis]

I decided to go to a local swimming pool, I used to love swimming a lot and in this week I only showered once. I felt incredibly dirty. A huge wave of shame got me when I had to go public with my old swim suit. But I felt a lot better when I saw nobody was really paying attention.. it was super crowded so I could basically hide between all those people.
I am seriously so happy I’ve been keeping money for myself when I actually had to give dad. All those bruises are worth it. So, I haven’t really been able to search for a place to stay, because you don’t get far without internet in these days. I’ve seen Louis on his iPhone, but I didn’t dare to ask to use it. Because it’s such a long time ago when I used the internet, and he would laugh at me so hard if I asked how to use the Internet. Same goes to an internet café. One can’t simply go to that place and ask ‘hey, can you explain me what this Internet shit is about?’ I would make it to the news, I’d bet on that.
So I still hadn’t really decided what I could do.
“Hi” I was now fully dressed brushing my hair in front of the gigantic mirror when a guy - I think he was at his late twenties- spoke to me.
“Uhm, hello” I smiled.
“It’s probably none of my business, but there is always a choice.” He looked extremely worried, and I didn’t like this at all. He made me very uncomfortable and I just wanted to run away from him.
“What exactly do you mean?” I asked politely.
“I work at the social welfare center, and it sure to hell looks like you are getting abused.” He spoke very formal, like this was an interview for my new job.
“uhm, you are clearly wrong, sir. I have a lovely relationship with my parents. Thank you for your concern anyway.” There was my crooked smile again.
“It doesn’t have to be your parents. It also can be your boyfriend, or stepdad, granddad, -“
“I’m good, thanks.” I cut him off, starting to get very impatiently.
“Well, here is my phone number, so you can always give me a call if you feel like you need to talk to someone.” He smiled friendly and gave me a card, with his address and phone number.
“That’s very kind of you Mr. Middleton” I read from the card. “but I don’t own a cell phone” I walked away without giving him any more of my attention.
~
“Jessssssssss!!!!!” Laura yelled excitedly when I entered her room again.
“Laura!” I imitated her enthusiasm.
“What have you been doing today?” she sat straight, after a lot of effort and groans of pain.
“Go easy on yourself, Laura.” I said worriedly. “I’ve been working, it was so boring. And went to the local swimming pool just a minute ago.” I sighed and put my ‘bag’ next to my ‘suitcase’ what is been standing there all week.
“nice shirt” she smiled, she looked so happy and careless and excited and.. Gosh I wish I was her.
“Thanks, Jack gave it me on my 15th birthday, but dad couldn’t know so I’ve never wore it before.” I explained.
“It looks nice on you” she complimented again.
“Thanks", I sighed again, closed my eyes and sighed another time.
“Louis came today, he asked for you.” She said cheerfully.
“Really? What did he say?” I mumbled, not opening my eyes.
“He said, he’d come by later today” I opened my eyes.
“Did he stay long?” I opened my eyes, looking at her.
“ ermm , we played a game called monopoly. I love that game! Really I’m so good in it.” She shone out happiness.
“I’m glad you had a nice day.” I smiled.
“What are we going to do next week?” her shining eyes changed in less than second to worry.
“I’ll figure something out.” I whispered.
There followed a long silence and I think Laura was fighting back her tiredness.
“I don’t think Louis is still coming, darling.” I said softly.
“He promised.” She pouted and almost began to cry. It will be so hard for her to say goodbye to Louis.
“I’m sorry, sweety. It’s already midnight” she closed her eyes and suddenly Louis opened the door, totally breathless.
“I am so sorry I am late. My boss called, and I suddenly remembered I didn’t even had your phone number and-“
“Louis!” Laura smiled happily.
“Hey little one! I got something for you.” He smiled and ruffled her hair.
“Hi, Jess” He looked at me before returning back to Laura.
“I figured, since you are sitting here in bed way to long. I brought some old movies. Actually I stole them from Liam. But it doesn’t matter.” He smiled.
“Is Liam as fun as you are?” Laura looked flurried to the DVD’s.
“No, I’m more fun.” I rolled my eyes and Louis glanced over to me and laughed at my reaction.
‘So will you forgive me if I don’t come visit tomorrow? I have something really important to do, tomorrow… So I won’t make it.” he pouted. “but the movies are classics! They’re all from Disney.” He smiled widely. And I couldn’t keep my eyes from those two. How they can make each other smile so much. It’s magic.
“What’s Disney?” she asked and Louis looked suddenly sorry, almost sad.
“Magic” he smiled again. I suddenly noticed a difference in his smile, this is how my smile must look. Crooked. There’s pity in his eyes and it cannot be ignored.
~
“Can I see those?” he pointed at notebook in my lap.
“Oh hell to the no” I shook my head, laughing.
“Please” puppy face all over.
“No, really no” I laughed again.
“Okay, whatever. I brought you a birthday present. Sorry it took me so long, I’ve been extremely busy, lately.” He got me a birthday present?
“Why?” I asked like it was a bad thing.
“Because you deserve a birthday present, even it’s from a stranger.” He was right, we were strangers. He knew my name, I knew his and that was kind of it.
“Uh, well if it didn’t cost you too much money. Why not” I smiled faintly.
“Don’t worry about money, okay?”
I opened it and immediately gave it back.
“I don’t want this.” It was an extremely expensive phone. I knew it because dad had the same one.
I can’t do anything with it so I didn’t need one. I had no phone numbers and no spare money for call credit.
“please, since you told me you lost your phone, all I wanted was to get you one.” He whined.
“Louis, please, no.” I handed it back. He took the box in his hands and looked at me sadly.
‘Don’t be so selfish, I want to keep in touch..” he turned the conversation.
“Don’t change it that way, Tomlinson!” I grinned.
“Please, Jess. It’s not even a new one… “
I didn’t answer.
“It’s Zayn’s old one and I put credit on it, so I only paid for the credit. If that makes you feel better.” He smiled adorably.
“urghhh, fine!” I grunted.
“Thank you” I whispered.
“You’re welcome, Jess” he smiled proudly.
We went on chatting a lot and he explained me how the phone worked and soon it was already 3 AM.
“Sorry, I have a big day tomorrow. I had a lovely time, we have to do this more often.” He smiled stood up and disappeared.
~
2 weeks passed and we basically were living on the street. I felt so sorry for Laura, but everything was so much more expensive here than at home. So we lived from cheap food, swimming pool showers and very cheap clothes. I’ve been charging my phone every 2 days in public places with plugs. So didn’t really had a lovely time.
“Hey Jess” Louis voice came from my speaker.
“Hello Louis!” Laura yelled.
“oh hey little one” I could see his smile in my head.
“Louis? You know you called right?”
“Oh yea right! So want to meet up?” I hesitated a second.
“Uh, yea sure!”
“not in public though.” I was confused.
“Are you going to murder us?” I joked. He laughed.
“8PM large Starbucks?”
“I thought you didn’t want to be seen with me in public-“
“I’ll pick you guys up there” he cut me off.
“Okay? Sure.. see you!”
“byeee!” click
“well that was weird” Laura said.
“I know right?” I murmured back.
~
“get in, get in, get in” Louis yelled.
“How are you? I’m good jeez thanks Louis, you’re so friendly today.” I said sarcastically.
“You know me” Louis answered cheekily.
I didn’t notice there was another guy in the car until he started laughing.
“This is-“
“Liam?” Laura asked.
“no, this is Niall, he wanted to meet you guys.” He told him about us?
“God, Louis you told him about Liam and not about me?” he acted hurt.
It went on and on like that. Whenever Louis said something the blonde guy, Niall started laughing.
“we’re here.”
“where? Which one?”
“all of it.” Niall said like it was no big deal and stepped out of the car.
~
After a long amount of moments I got used to his ‘apartment’. It was already midnight and Laura was already sleeping.
“I should head off.” I stood up.
“What now already?” Niall whined and pouted his lips.
“It’s not a great plan, you can stay the night if you want. Niall’s crashing here too anyway.” Louis raised his shoulders.
“It’s okay I’ll walk home.”
“I’m going to pee, don’t leave without saying goodbye!” Niall stood up and left.
“Let me at least walk you home”
“No!” I instantly answered.
“You’ve been drinking a lot tonight, I don’t want you to end up in the hospital again.” Louis spoke with seriousness all over his face.
“No, really I’m okay.
“C’mon Jess, please.”
“No, I’m okay really!”
“I insist.” It kept going like that and going and going, and suddenly I couldn’t hold it anymore.
“I have no place to walk to, I have to make sure Laura doesn’t have such a horrible youth as I had please leave me alone. I don’t want to drag you into my pathetic little life everything is just too much!” I yelled and tears started to come down my cheeks. All the tears from 10 years. It didn’t stop and Louis stood there paralyze, looking at me with pity (again).
He hugged me tightly, and for once I hugged him back. It felt good to hug someone, I never really had that experience before.
His shirt was already soaked, and I couldn’t control myself. So the tears kept rolling down my cheeks. They just wouldn’t stop.
“It’s okay. It’s okay” he kept whispering in my ears. “Jess, everything will be okay.”

Notes