Loose Change (Harry Styles) [BOOK 2]

“Jane.” He repeats with his eyes a little wide.
I kick the jar behind me, so he won’t see it.
“How do you know her?” Liam asks as he glances at Harry with curiosity.
“Why are you here?” Harry asks, ignoring Liam completely.
He begins to walk closer to me and I’m starting to feel more nervous. I tighten my grip around my sketchbook.
“I-I ugh-“
“She’s collecting money.” Liam says for me.
Harry raises one eyebrow at Liam and looks back at me.
“Why?” he asks.
Liam looks at Harry confused.
“Mate, she’s ho-“
“Hoping to earn money for my drawings.” I interrupt Liam.
Liam looks even more lost as his eyes meet mine.
I bite my bottom lip and I nod a little at Liam, hoping he’ll just go with what I’m saying.
He stares behind me and at my sketchbook, before looking back at Harry who looks suspicious.
“Ya, I was just going to buy a drawing from her.” Liam states.
I mentally thank him.
Harry looks at Liam with his eyes narrowed.
“Well where is it?” He asks as he begins to cross his arms.
Liam’s eyes widen a little and he turns to me, waiting for my say.
I loosen my grip on my sketchbook and lower it, so I can see it better.
“Um, this one.” I say as I open my sketch book and begin to flip through the pages.
I feel Harry’s eyes staring down at me.
I stop on the drawing of the crowd and I carefully rip it out.
“Here.” I say with a fake smile as I hand Liam one of my best drawings. Calm down. You can always draw another.
Liam grabs it hesitantly and his hand even shakes a little. I guess he’s one of those people who get really nervous when they lie.
“Thanks.” He whispers.
I smile slightly and I look at Harry, who still doesn’t look convinced.
“Why are you here? Why couldn’t you sell them in another area?” Harry asks as he stares at the paper in Liam’s hands.
I feel my eyes widen and I quickly calm myself down, so he won’t notice.
“I um-“
“I wanted her to hand it to me in person.” Liam adds.
I glance at Liam and all I want to do is hug him. He doesn’t even know me and he’s helping me. He is too nice for his own good.
I just nod my head as Harry looks back at me.
“Well why d-“
“We’re both your friends. We wouldn’t lie to you.” Liam defends as he rolls his eyes.
Harry un tangles his arms and clenches his fists slightly as he looks me up and down with a face of disgust.
He steps back from me and begins to walk back to the studio.
“She isn’t my friend.” I hear him say.
I feel my stomach clench and I can’t help but shut my eyes closed.
“He didn’t mean it.”
I open my eyes slightly to see Liam looking a little concerned.
I hold back my emotions and I force a soft smile.
“I’m fine. Thank you by the way.”
He mirrors my expression.
“No problem…but why won’t you tell him the truth? There is nothing to be ashamed about.”
I take a deep breath.
“We’re not friends…remember? I’m just a girl he met at a park. That’s all.” I whisper a little hurt.
I turn around and I grab my jar. I hold it carelessly as I look back at Liam. If it falls out of my grasp, I wouldn’t even care.
“Bye… Thanks again.” I say while forcing yet another smile.
As I begin to walk, I feel someone touch my shoulder and I turn around.
“I never got to pay you for the drawing.” He states.
I raise one eyebrow in curiosity. What is he talking ab- Oh.
“No It’s fine. I swear. I want to give it to you for free. I’ve never even sold a drawing of mine in my life.”
He takes out the bill from earlier out of his pocket and puts it in my jar. Before I can argue, he walks away from me. I sigh and stare down at the piece of green paper. How can a simple piece of paper be worth so much?
I grab the bill from the jar and I slip it in my jacket’s pocket. I glance at the studio one last time before walking back to the mall. I shouldn’t have come back. I shouldn’t have come in the first place.
…
I sit down next to the Chanel store in my usual spot. More and more people begin to pass me and to be honest I don’t care.
All I want right now is to be in my father’s arms, feeling safe…but I can’t. If I just run to him, it will cause a scene and he’ll ask why I’m feeling like this. I’ve already lied to him enough and I don’t think I can live with myself if I do it once again, so I just have to deal with it.
I slam my fist lightly on the ground. I’m tired of having to deal with this, that, everything… I wrap my arms around myself and I look down on the floor. I hate feeling this small. I want to be big…strong.
I sniffle, trying to hold back my tears. I just want to be alone, but I have nowhere to go. I can’t take it anymore. The tears spill out of my eyes and I don’t want to even imagine what the people surrounding me are thinking, saying.
“Why the hell are you crying?”
I look up and I quickly wipe my tears. Two skinny teenage girls with long hair and oversized hand bags, are staring down at me.
I look up at them in confusion and I have no words to say. Maybe they’ll just go away if I ignore them.
“Hey, loser I’m talking to you.”
My self-esteem begins to get punched and kicked with each word coming out of both their mouths.
“Oh look she’s crying. Poor baby.”
“How does it feel to be worthless? You are literally worth nothing.”
I hug myself tighter and I slowly look up at them.
“Please leave me alone.” I whisper.
They both have beautifully straight brown hair and manicured nails. Typical.
The one on the right begins to snicker.
“Aw, we just want to help you out.”
“What?” I ask completely lost.
They both grin evilly at each other and I feel scared.
The one on the left who is holding a cup that has a green mermaid symbol on it bends down and stares into my eyes.
She observes my face and chuckles before she lowers her gaze to my jar.
“Hungry, anything will be much appreciated.” She reads aloud.
I feel my face redden and I look down at my hands ashamed.
I don’t want to look at them, I can’t. There laughter is already tearing me apart.
“Aww she’s hungry.” I hear the one next to me say.
I open my eyelids hesitantly and I see how the girl stands up and looks down at me.
“Do you think she’s thirsty too?” She asks her friend, while keeping her eyes locked on me.
“I think she is.” Her friend responds.
I feel my mouth open and I can’t form any words. I’m literally frozen right now. It’s pathetic.
“Maybe we should give her a little something to ease her thirst.
Wha-
“AGH!” I scream in pain as hot coffee is poured all over my head.
It’s blazing hot.
I begin to cry uncontrollably as I place my hands on the top of my head, still in shock.
“What have I ever done to you!?” I yell as my face continues to soak.
The girl bends down again and lowers her head to my ear.
“I’m just doing what I normally do. I step on dirt.” She whispers.
She pulls away and her and her friend, laugh uncontrollably as they walk away from me.
What did I do to deserve this? I mean I’ve been spit on before and a person has even kicked dirt in my face, but never this. I know my scalp is going to be sore tomorrow.
I grab all my stuff and I just begin to run. I don’t care if I cause a scene, I don’t care if I have to tell him everything, I need to hug my father. Coffee drips from the tips of my hair as I continue running towards the bistros at the back of the mall.
I spot a man sitting down on the floor, trying to catch people’s attention. My dad.
I run to him and I drop myself into his lap as I desperately wrap my arms around him.
He seems completely startled, but then calms down as he realizes it’s me. He pulls away and stares at me in complete shock.
“What happened? Who did this to you?” He asks as anger begins to take over his features.
I cry even more and I hug him tighter.
“I don’t want to be here daddy. Please, can we leave…please.” I plead.
I feel his hand begin to stroke the back of my now damp head softly.
“Let’s go.” He whispers.
We both pull away and when he gets up, he helps me up as well.
He grabs my wrist and begins to walk, dragging me.
As we walk out of the mall, people begin to look at me and whisper things to each other.
“Don’t pay attention to any of them Jane. Just keep looking forward. That’s all you have to do.” I hear my father say.
I swallow hard and do as my father says. I just look straight ahead.
Maybe that’s what I should be doing…looking forward.
…
We’ve been walking for half an hour and I have no idea where he’s taking me. The liquid has dried in my hair and now I smell like a walking coffee bean.
“Where are we going?” I finally ask.
“Where we belong.” He simply states.
“Wh-“
I’m stopped in my tracks as I see the recognizable white building with the recognizable mural of angels.
We’re at the homeless shelter.
I feel my heart ache inside my chest and I look up at my dad who looks guilty.
“Daddy I-“
“I’m so sorry Janey. You don’t deserve this life, I know you don’t and I keep bringing you into all this horrible shit. I’m so sorry that you don’t have a home and you get treated like this.” My dad says finally looking at me. His eyes are beginning to shine and I can’t help my tears.
“You’re my home, dad.” I respond as I wrap my arms tightly around him.
He hugs me and squeezes me tight. I can hear the beating of his broken heart as my head lies on his chest and I begin to soak his shirt with my tears.
He pulls away and stares down at me.
“You are going to sleep here every day. You’re going to stay here every day. Do you understand me?” He says.
“W-what about you?” I ask.
“Don’t worry I’m not going anywhere. I’m of course going to stay here as well. I’m going to see if maybe Katherine can help me get a job.”
I smile excitedly and I hug him again.
“You’re going to do great. Everyone is going to want you!”
He chuckles.
“Let’s just see.” He states.
A few days later
I slowly open my eyes and I yawn loudly. I look around me and I notice how I’m the only one in a bed. How long did I sleep?
“Good morning or shall I say good afternoon.” Katherine says as she walks in the room with an amused smile on her face.
“Afternoon?” I ask.
She walks up to me and sits at the edge of the bed. She nods.
“It’s almost two.”
I feel my eyes widen.
“What!? I can’t believe I did that again!”
She chuckles.
“Why have you been so tired lately?” She asks.
The past couple of days I have been waking up in the afternoon. I’ve never done that before. I usually go to sleep early and I wake up early so I can watch the sun rise. Ever since I got here a few days ago, I haven’t been able to sleep at night nor have I watched the sun rise. I miss it dearly. I guess I’m nervous for my father. Katherine helped him get two interviews for this month and I’m stressed out. I mean he’s going to be fine right? He’s going to get the job…Who am I kidding. Even though my father is amazing and I have confidence in him, he’s a homeless man. I don’t know if they’ll be able to look passed that.
“Jane?”
I shake my thoughts and I look at Katherine. I think too much.
“What was the question?” I asked a little embarrassed.
“Why have you been so tired lately?”
Should I lie or tell her the truth?
I glance at Katherine and see how concerned she looks.
“I’m just worried about my father, I guess.”
Truth it is. I’m tired of lying anyway. Lying gets you nowhere in life.
She gives me a sympathetic smile.
“He’s going to do fine sweetie.”
I smile back and I nod my head slowly.
“I know.”
A month later
The door begins to open and I can’t help my hands from sweating nervously.
My dad walks in and I quickly run to his side.
“How was it?” I ask anxiously.
He looks at me and kisses the top of my head.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers.
My hopes fall and I sigh.
“It’s okay dad. Maybe, the next job, I mean…”
“I’m going to sleep.” He says.
Before I can respond he brushes passed me, saddened. I want to follow him, but I know that look. He wants to be alone.
I can’t believe no one will even give him a chance. I mean he has all his degrees and has had various working experience, but just because of one mistake….people are cruel and blind.
Maybe I should draw… I haven’t drawn in a while.
…
“I’m so sorry. Please, she needs this. All the bad things I’ve done in my life….please take it out on me. Not her. She deserves more than this. Please God.”
I open my eyes slightly and I see how my dad is sitting up on his bed, staring at the ceiling.
“Please God. Please.” He pleads.
I feel my heart stop and I close my eyes as he looks at me. I don’t want him to know that I was over hearing. I suddenly feel lips touch my forehead and I shut my eyes tighter.
I need to get him the watch. I have to.
…
Next Night
Everyone is now asleep and it’s now time for my plan to commence. My dad doesn’t let me ask for money anymore. He told me how he doesn’t want me to get hurt again. He also told me that I cannot leave the shelter without him. He’s being really over protective and it’s kind of annoying. He even told Katherine to watch me the whole day to make sure I don’t leave! Ever since last night, I knew that I have to make my father smile again. And not one of those fake ones I keep on seeing, a real genuine one. I still have the money I saved, but it still isn’t enough, so my plan is to sneak out when everyone is asleep and to ask for money. Ya I know it’s late, but they’re usually people still up. They’re has to be someone that can give me something.
I tippy toe out of my bed, I grab my jar, and I begin to head toward the back. Karen, the desk lady is at the front and would tell my father if she saw me try to sneak out, so I have to go through the back door.
Where the heck is this door? Remember Katherine showed you how it’s near the kitchen! Oh yes!
I walk to the kitchen silently and I can’t help but feel like a spy. I’m pretty good at this sneaky stuff.
I find the kitchen and I open the ‘For Personnel Only’ door. Not today door. Not today.
As I walk through the kitchen, I stare at the floor to make sure there isn’t anything that would cause me to slip and fall.
I feel a sharp pain in my pinky toe as it hits one of the tables.
I quickly cover my mouth with my hand, trying not to scream. That’s what stinks about flip flops, they don’t protect your feet very well.
I bite my bottom lip hard, trying to hold in my scream. Dang that hurt!
I limp a little as I continue to walk towards the door.
“I found you!” I whisper to myself as I spot the door.
I slowly twist the door knob and I push it slightly.
When I walk out I close it and I run as fast as I can away from this place. This must be how normal teenagers feel when they sneak out.
I smile in victory as I am now far away from the building.
Okay, now where do I go…
Maybe I should’ve thought about this better.
I begin to walk around the town, trying to find lights. Ah there’s one! I follow the direction where the light is coming from. It’s a Target. Target is still open? Wait what time is it anyway? Whatever, it’s open.
I walk to the entrance and I sit down at the side of the door next to a red trash can.
I place my jar in front of me and I wait patiently.
…
A few days later
My plan is working perfectly! I almost have enough money. I just need about thirty bucks more. If I stay long enough this time, I might get it. The watch I want to get my dad looks exactly like his old one. It’s gold and has a dark brown leather wrist band. It’s beautiful. It’s sadly very expensive, but hey… I almost have enough money so I’m not complaining.
The security kicked me out from sitting next to the entrance, they said I was ‘Harassing the customers.’
Whatever. Now I just sit next to a tree in the parking lot. Sure, I don’t get as much money as I did when I was near the entrance, but I still get money.
“Thank you sir.” I say with a smile.
The man smiles back and walks to Target.
I also like the people here better. They are much kinder and are not snobs. My dad and I should’ve come here instead of the mall.
I can’t help but yawn. I’ve been here for a few hours and I’m exhausted. Maybe I can just rest my eyes for just..a….seco-
…
“Do you think she’s dead?”
“No, look her chest is moving.”
I begin to move around and I feel how a blanket is on me. Wait what?
“Look she’s moving.”
I spread out my hands and I feel the pillow that my head is resting on and the fabric beneath me.
I quickly open my eyes and I sit up. I can’t help but scream as I realize how I’m in a room…in a bed. Am I dreaming? This has to be a dream.
“Jane calm down, it’s me.”
I look to the side to see Liam walking up to me. He rest his hand on my shoulder and I can’t help but stare at it wide eyed.
This isn’t a dream.
He removes his hand as he notices my reaction and I hear someone laugh. I turn my head to the right to see a blonde kid with tattoos staring at me, a little amused.
“W-what am I doing here? Where am I? W-what the heck is happening!?!” I ask as I begin to feel more frightened.
I hold the blanket tighter and I bring it up to my face as I scoot back.
The two boys look at each other and nod.
“Well Jane-“
All of our gazes turn to the room door as it slams open.
“Liam what the fuck are you doing here an- Wait what the fuck are you doing in my house!?” Harry yells as he stomps his way to me.
Why am I here?

Notes