Emma’s P.O.V.

It's hard to say that everything sprung right back into where they left off before that night. Things just didn't go that way, I tried my best for them to but it was difficult. Harry would place his hands on my waist from behind and I'd freak out. Every touch reminded me of Riley and I didn't know how to make it stop. It's been almost a month and Harry hasn't been able to hold me. I was thankful that he wasn't ready to let go of me yet, but I would understand if at some point he was tired of my fear and wanted to end things. It would only be fair for him.

"Do you want some soda?" I asked Harry from the kitchen.

"No," he answered and I leaned against the sink. A long sigh released from my body, we were watching a movie and it got me so upset how we used to cuddle but now... Now every time his hand inches closer to me I get this itch that I just need to get away from. I needed to get over this fear so I walked fiercely into the living room and stopped right in front of him. His eyes traveled up my body and to my face where he looked confused. My mind was blocking me from just sitting on his lap and cuddling up to his chest. It was like I was frozen there, unable to move and I could feel the tears forming. But I didn’t want to cry and be weak anymore, I didn’t want this fear to control me. Without a thought, I sat on his lap and allowed my body to mold into his. This took Harry by complete shock. “Are you okay?” he asked, unsure if he should wrap his long arms around my small body.

“Yeah, just hug me.” And he did.

“God, I missed you.” Harry got greedy fast and wrapped his arms around me tight. This got me nervous and I started to doubt why I did it in the first place. He engulfed me with attention from his arms. That’s when I looked down at his hand and noticed the rings that rested on his fingers. I stopped thinking about the bad thoughts and just focused on his hand. This was Harry’s hand, I felt so much more comfortable reminding myself that it was Harry and no one else. Harry hesitated as he watched me caress his hand. “Everything okay? Did I take it too far?” He started to stress over the thought of messing up what he wanted so bad but I smiled down at his hand.

“No, no. Everything’s fine, Harry.” I brought his one hand to my lips and kissed it, looking over at his beautiful green eyes.

“I love you,” he let out a long breath.

“I love you too,” I said, sealing our words with a kiss.



The next morning, when I woke up in Harry’s arms it didn’t even scare me at all. The itch was no longer lingering around me, it felt normal again. It was almost amazing how fast I got over it by facing the fear. His hands were resting on my burning hot, bare skin that my shirt was no longer covering. “Good morning,” his raspy voice broke the silent air. In reaction to his voice, I turned around so I was facing him. His lips seemed so inviting so I helped myself. Pressing my lips to his, I didn’t waste any time. “Slow down,” he laughed against my lips. “I can’t even keep up with you,” he said smiling still. A blush took over my face because I didn’t notice my eagerness until he pointed it out. “Don’t be embarrassed,” he said kissing me and then soon enough I couldn’t keep up with him. His hands made their way all around my half bare body that his t-shirt didn’t do a very good job of covering up. But Harry didn’t seem to mind that. I hated to ruin such a good moment but I had to stop him.

“Harry,” I breathed. He got the memo and stopped what he was doing.

“Sorry,” he sighed. “I just can’t control myself around you,” he admitted. I let out a loud laugh but I don’t know why, he just seemed so adorable right now.

“It’s fine. I just don’t want to take advantage of the fact that you can touch me again, you know?” I asked, hoping I was making as much sense out loud as I was in my own head.

“I understand completely,” he smiled. He placed a kiss on my nose and then rolled out of the humungous bed. “Breakfast out?” he asked, putting on a pair of jeans.

“Yes, please.” I practically begged, jumping out of the bed as well and searched for a pair of sweats because unlike Harry I wasn’t a jean person. Thankfully, he respected that. “Do you have any sweats I can borrow?” I asked looking around the room and noticing that there was not a pair to be found.

“Well considering my girlfriend takes all my sweatpants, no, no I do not.” Harry joked.

“Where could they all go?” I asked…well more like whined because the worst thing that could probably happen after waking up is waking up to no sweats to throw on. “This is ridiculous! Why don’t you just go get me something and bring it back?”

“Or why don’t you just go put on a pair of jeans or leggings?” I thought about the leggings and then remembered that I had worn my last pair yesterday.

“No more leggings either,” I sighed.

“Then jeans it is,” Harry smirked, picking up a pair of jeans off the floor and handing them to me. He knew how much I hated jeans because my but never fit right in them. “No,” I pushed the pair of jeans away from me. “Do you want to see me cry when I put those on?” I asked, already predicting what would happen if I took the attempt to put on the jeans.

“No, I want you to put them on and smile and understand that you’re not fat. You just have a big butt which quite frankly, I don’t have a single problem with.” Harry winked at me, putting the pair of jeans back in my hands. I rolled my eyes and started to put on the jeans and as I did, Harry started to sing one of his lines from his song Little Things.

“You still have to squeeze into your jeans but you’re perfect to me,” he sang trying not to laugh at the same time. I hoped that the death glare I was sending him, that he would shut up but he just kept singing.

“Harry, shut up!” I whined and started to throw things at him until it was silent. I finally buttoned the jeans and he looked at me like I was a child who didn’t want to take a bath before bedtime.

“See that wasn’t so bad,” he smiled and walked over to me. “You’re beautiful just remember that,” he kissed my lips and then the top of my head. “Alright let’s go,” he said leaving the room.



Later that day, Niall came back to London for a week and decided to spend the rest of the day with Harry and me. We went to the park to play football (American football) with Coralie too. It was almost sad to say that Coralie and I were winning against Niall and Harry. “Niall shut up and just throw me the ball!” Coralie yelled across the field we were on. Niall threw the ball and Coralie ducked and unluckily I didn’t. The end of the football hit me right in the head, knocking me over. “Every time Niall!”

“Shit, how does this always happen? I swear this girl is a magnet to injuries!” Niall said. I heard them all run over to me and Harry knelt down beside me.

“Emma?” Harry asked. I let out a laugh.

“Niall is right, I am a complete magnet to injuries!”

“She’s laughing, we’re good!” Niall sighed with relief. Harry helped me up and rubbed my head
where a huge bump was predicted to form by tomorrow. “Sorry, Em.” Niall apologized, kissing my cheek really quickly.

“Hey, it’s fine.” I smiled and it wasn’t until now that I really noticed how prone to injuries I was. I was in the hospital once, concussed another time, raped and just nailed in the head with a football. That’s when I really realized how easy it was for me to say the word “raped” in my head. It came so freely but still stung along with the memories that rested in the back of my mind. Immediately my mood changed from giggly to upset. The dull feeling came back and Harry noticed. Thankfully, Niall and Coralie walked away to go get Coralie’s bag on the bench.

“You okay?” Harry asked, noticing my change in mood. “Does your head hurt?” I suddenly felt the need to throw up because the thought of Riley wouldn’t leave my mind.

“Can you take me home?” I asked, quietly.

“You look sick…you’re white as a ghost.” He noted and ran his hand over my forehead and down my cheek. “Yeah, let’s go home.”


The car ride was agonizingly long even though in reality it was only a few minutes. I felt like we were never going to get home. Suddenly, I felt like I was being trapped in the car and I needed to stop but Harry refused and sped home. Back at the apartment, I walked into the front door and felt like everything was spinning until the next thing I knew, it was dark.



When I woke up, the room was blurry and the urge to throw up only became stronger. I lifted myself up and Harry was sitting at the end of the couch. “Hey, you.” He half smiled and came over and knelt down on the side of the couch. “How ya feeling?” he asked, caressing my face.

“Pretty gross,” I admitted. “Did I pass out?” I asked.

“Yeah, almost hit the ground but luckily I noticed before you did. You scared me shitless,” he slightly laughed and shrugged. “Do you want anything?” he asked. I shook my head, not wanting to put him to more work as it seems to be all he does nowadays is save me from crashing too hard.

“Sorry that I scared you,” I whispered.

“Don’t be,” he gave me peck on my cheek and gave me the best reassuring smile he could.

“Can you cuddle with me?” I asked, surprising me and him but he didn’t resist. He climbed onto the couch with me and wrapped his arms around me. This made me feel safe and secure. Nothing was a better cure than his arms.

Notes