It's been almost two weeks since we left London, it was hard as always to leave but somehow it felt easier then the first times. I guess I'm getting used to it in some way, however weird that sounds. Besides I know that I will see him soon. I think about Harry every single minute that passes, he's in every move I make and it hurts that I can't share everything with him. I miss him like crazy. How many couple has to deal with this separation in the first months of their relationship? My guess is not that many. But he is doing something he loves and that makes me happy, I want him happy. To hear about every crazy little thing that happens during shows and interviews, it's so much fun, especially when he sounds so cheerful.

I woke up early from a wonderful, frustrating dream. I remember how he had touched me, his hands all over my body, his lips stroking mine before they went down to the place where my jaw meets my neck. How the feeling shot through my body, giving me goosebumps. His breath on my chest as he kissed my breasts. His fingers as they stoke my core, the ecstasy as he entered me...

God, I can't think about it anymore, I'll go crazy if I do. Sexual frustration was probably the worst.

I walked out of bed to get a shower, I was working today and we had a huge celebrity that Jack was photographing. I was very exited about it. I hadn't met too many famous people if you don't count my boyfriend and his closest friends. We had talked about me meeting Ed, but he had been out on tour and then the guys went on their tour, so it got delayed. I was very exited about meeting him though, he has been one of my favorites for a while.

After the shower I braided two strands of hair in front and tied them in the back of my head. The rest of my hair layed with soft curls around my shoulders. I put on my favorite pair of jeans and a nice flannel shirt. I took out a yoghurt drink to take with me and then I headed out the door. Leo was waiting for me down by the entrance door. He smiled as I came up to him.

“Ready?” He asked walking me to the door.

“Yes.” I smiled as I walked out, I was feeling good today. I was so exited to meet this person we were taking photos of today. We were going to a nice mansion to take these pictures and that will be cool. I pick up my phone as we sit in the car when it vibrates.

From Harry
Good luck today! Hope you have fun. I love you!

Aww! He remembered. I smiled big as I answered. I can't believe he remembered! I hadn't talked to him yesterday, they had a show and I had to go to bed early and still he remembered it.

“So, are you excited?” Leo asked from the driver seat, giving me a cheeky grin.

“Yes, very!” I said smiling back at him. “I've looked forward to this for so long.” I say and can't keep the happiness from my voice. He laughs a little at my jolly dance I'm doing in my seat.

I had decided only to bring one bodyguard today since we would be in an closed location and there would be other security their since we had a celebrity coming. We stopped at the big parking lot and walked around the huge mansion since I knew that's where we were working today. We had been here, looking at the place a week ago, to see which places we were going to shoot at. Jack was already there and I walked over to him, seeing Leo go to sit down at a bench a bit away from us.

“Hey, they're coming any minute now.” He said with a smile, knowing how much I was looking forward to this. I had butterflies in my stomach.

“Hi, great. Where do you want me?” I said and he pointed to a couple of bags with equipment. I walked over to put together a reflector and three flashes. I put it out where Jack wanted the first pictures to be taken. Then I heard and saw in the corner of my eye a commotion at the side of the big house. A group of people was walking over to us and in the middle I saw her, the one and only – Ellie Goulding. My heart started to beat faster. Wow! She was one of my favorite artist ever. She was so good, such a angelic voice and she seemed so sweet. My nerves was on edge as they stopped in front of Jack to greet him. I was standing a couple of feet behind them and felt so nervous.

Her makeup artist and stylist sat their things up by the tables that Jack had fixed. They had a lot of stuff, makeup all over the table and a bag filled with clothes. Jack introduced me to Ellie and I said a shaky hello, she smiled kindly at me. Jack explained what he had planned and she seemed to like the direction of his thoughts.

“You're dating Harry right?” She said as Jack went to get his camera.

“Yeah, that's right.” I said, smiling when I hear his name. My heart squeezing a little from missing him. I knew that they knew each other, they had meet a few times on different red carpet-events.

“I thought so. He's a great guy, I've met him a couple of times. It's so fun to meet you.” She say and I get shocked from her words. She thinks it's fun to meet me? Me? Oh my god!

“It's so nice to meet you, I've always loved your music.” I say honestly, blushing a little.

“Thank you, love.” She say before her stylist come and get her, she waves before leaving to get styled. The british people and the word love! But how I liked hearing it, it was so sweet. I was so grateful that I was surrounded with british accents, I loved it so much.

We took so many beautiful pictures of Ellie before lunch. We kept close to the mansion but we were going down to the water after lunch. Ellie and her crew went away to eat lunch at a local restaurant, but Jack ordered some food that was delivered for us. He didn't want us to take too long of a break since we needed to move all out equipment down to the water.

It was just me and Leo sitting and eating since Jack couldn't sit still and was away looking through his pictures. Leo was a pretty good company, he was funny and nice. I picked up my phone as it vibrated in my pocket. The display said Eleanor.

“Hey you.” I answered with a smile, we hadn't talked in a couple of days.

“Hi. Am I interrupting?” Her happy voice asked.

“No not at all, I'm just eating some lunch.” I said taking a sip of my soda.

“I want to hear everything about it later, you have to tell me how she is.” She shirked, making me smile bigger. “But I was wondering if you wanted to come out with us ladies tonight?” She sounded hopeful, pushing for a yes. I didn't know how much of a party mode I would be in after this day of work. “Please?” She added, making me laugh.

“I don't know. I might be a little tired.” I said, also remembering that I had given Robert the day off to spend with his family.

“The tequila will change that.” She said snickering. I looked over at Leo, covering the phone with my hand.

“Do you mind going out tonight? I gave Robert the day off.” I ask him, feeling horrible for even asking him to work day and night.

“Sure, no problem.” He say and smile.

“Okey, I'll come.” I say to Eleanor who screams with happiness. I hold the phone away from my ear until I hear her stop. She was very loud.

“Great, I'll see you tonight. Come over when you're done.” She say and hang up. I put the phone away and turn back to my food.

“Sorry for making you work tonight too.” I say, regretting asking him.

“Don't be. I don't mind.” He say and take a bite of his spaghetti, smiling huge at me. Leo was just a couple of years older then me, I think he's 25 and I know that he doesn't have any family of his own. I remember Perrie's statement when she saw him for the first time. Why doesn't my bodyguards look like that? If I were single and not madly in love with Zayn, I'd hit that. She had said and snickered. I had told her that it was probably why Zayn had given her older, less attractive men as bodyguards. We had all laughed at it. I guess he was pretty attractive, when I thought about it, which I hadn't before. He was pretty big – huge arms, brown short hair and a nice smile. He could probably find a nice girl, if I didn't keep him out all night every night, which I didn't intend too. This was a one time thing. I felt really bad for making him word tonight, but Harry would kill me if I didn't bring security with me.

Well I guess we're going out partying tonight. It's been a while and I love hanging with the girls. We hadn't meet all of us since London, so it would be nice to see them.

We brought our stuff down to the water, Leo even helped, which was great. Ellie and her team of people came and we took beautiful pictures by the water. I really loved one where she had a white maxi dress on and was wading in the water. She looked like an angel. I was really feeling photography, maybe I should photograph more myself. I hadn't really taken many pictures since I came here. I remembered that I didn't have a camera anymore since the incident in my apartment. I sighed. Maybe I could save up for one?

“Say hi to Harry for me.” Ellie said as she hugged me goodbye. It was so much fun to meet her and she was even nicer in person than I thought. I had so much adrenaline when we packed down all the stuff before packing it into the cars. I was so pumped that I wasn't even tired yet. I was hoping that I could keep that up before we had to go out.

We rode home in the car and I couldn't stop talking. Leo just smiled at me and let me babble about Ellie. It was nice. She had been so nice to me, she was suck a sweet person.

“Get some rest. I'm going to take a shower and get ready before I go to Eleanor's. We won't probably go out until later. I'll call you.” I say to him before we part ways and I go to my apartment to hop into the shower. I decide to make Eleanor happy by putting on a nice dress and some heels. She always thinks I'm too boring with my jeans and a t-shirt. I send a text to Harry before I go to Eleanor, I know he's working right now.

To Harry
Hey babe, today was AMAZING! I wish I could share it with you. I'm going out with the girls, so will probably not be able to call. Love you!!

He sends an answer almost directly.

From Harry
I'm so happy for u. Sending this while in interview. Badass! Have fun with the girls. Love you more.

I smile as I read it. Even though he's working, he takes time to text me, my wonderful, sweet man. I walk to Eleanor's and open the door without knocking, it had become an habit. Danielle was already there, sitting by the counter in the kitchen.

“Hi. I've missed you.” Eleanor shouted before hugging me tight.

“I've missed you too. Both of you.” I said as I hugged Danielle.

“Want a drink?” Eleanor asked and I accepted. I needed alcohol if I was getting through this night, I was starting to feel the tiredness of my body. I tried my best to ignore it.

“Heeey giiirlsss!” Perrie screamed as she threw the door open with a bottle in her hand. “Anyone ready for tequila?” She asked with a huge smile as she came up to us by the kitchen counter. Eleanor got shot glasses from the cupboard, as Perrie started to cut the lemons she had brought.

“Of course. What else?” I asked with a grin. We did a couple of shots and they were starting to work their magic. When the clock was about eleven I called Leo to say that we were on our way out soon. We all fixed our makeups before we headed out, needing two cars since we had so much security. It was pretty ridiculous when you thought about it, but I knew they were necessary.

We came in to the club and the music was blasting through the speakers. Perrie had called in and gotten us a VIP table and she ordered more tequila as we got there. I was getting pretty tipsy by now, but felt good. We took two shots each before we headed out onto the dance floor. Our security spreading out across the room. I danced close to the girls, following the music. We laughed so much and I felt myself getting drunker by the minute. I had a lot of fun though and didn't mind that I would feel horrible in the morning, I didn't have any job, so I could lay in bed all day.

We went back to stand by our table and more drinks came in, Perrie was a crazy one. She really wanted us drunk. Thank god that we had security with us, that way I knew that the girls would be fine no matter what. I gladly took the drink that Perrie gave me and cheered with the other girls. It wasn't really possible to talk in this club, the music was too loud. But for some reason we tried and everyone just stood there saying “What?” over and over, it was hilarious. I laughed so much that my stomach hurt. We took another shot before we went back out on the dance floor. I saw Leo on the way and he just smiled and shook his head at me. I ignored him as we started to shake our hips to the music.

After an hour of more dancing I started to get tired, I felt the day full of work come back at me and I was very drunk by now. My head was starting to cloud and I knew that I needed to go to bed. I shouted into Eleanor's ear that I needed to go home, she nodded and I said to the other girls the same. Perrie and Eleanor wanted to continue their partying, but Danielle was ready to go home also. We said goodbye to the two dancing girls before heading towards the door. I looked around frantic for Leo and suddenly he was standing right in front of me.

“Ready to go?” He asked and I put my hand on his chest and started to get an laughing attack by the surprise of his presence. “I think you are.” He said as he chuckled and helped me out to the car. My laughing brought Danielle with it and we couldn't stop, I don't think we even knew what we were laughing at, we were just laughing.

I hugged Danielle goodbye in the elevator before she went off and we continued up to my floor. I stumbled a little as I walked the hall to my door, Leo held my arm as support. I opened it and threw off my shoes the first thing I did. I hated wearing heels, why did people torment themselves with these things? The room was lightly spinning as I went over to the sink to get some water. I almost got a heart attack when I turned around and Leo was standing there, close. I had forgotten that he had walked me back. He was smiling at me and I smiled back.

“Thank you for follow me home.” I said, slurring a little.

“No problem.” He smiled and took a strand of my hair and put it behind my ear. I was too drunk to even reflect on it. I closed my eyes, the room spinning too fast. I was so drunk. Before I knew it, his lips was pressed against mine. My eyes shooting open in surprise. What the hell? It took my brain a few seconds to realize what was happening. When it finally hit me, I pushed him back with a shocked expression.

“What the fuck?” I almost screamed. He wasn't Harry. He couldn't kiss me!

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry...” He said, ashamed I think, as he walked to the door and left.

My mind was working so slow on the alcohol. What just happened? I slided down the cabinet, down to the floor and felt my eyes watering. What just happened? I put my hands in my hair, leaning my elbows on my knees and felt the tears streamed down my cheeks as the sobs started. Did I just cheat on Harry? Did that count as cheating? Why did he kiss me? What the hell!?

---

I woke up on the floor, feeling my back ache. Why was I laying on the floor? I was so stiff. I sat up slowly, wincing as my head wanted to explode. My mouth tested like... I don't even know, a bathroom floor? Yuk! Wow, I needed some painkillers for this headache. What happened last night? Why was I on the floor? I rubbed the side of my face, trying to remember.

All of a sudden the flashbacks from yesterday was returning. I remembered all the tequila, the dancing and then I remembered the lips against mine, the wrong lips. I was shocked. I felt my eyes watering again. Why had he kissed me? Had I led him on in some way? I don't remember doing that. I wasn't interested in him. Not even close!

Oh my god! Did that really happen? Shit! I didn't want anyone else besides Harry. What would Harry say? Shit! I felt the tears fall down my cheeks, making my head hurt even more. This was too much with an hangover. Harry will be so mad. He will be so hurt.

Should I tell him?

Notes

Should she tell him?

Comment!

xx.