Behind The Backstage Doors

"Alison, look at me into eyes and tell me one more time you're sure about this," Brianna said as Alison was packing her clothes in the luggage. She sighed out loud and turned her head to Brianna who was sitting on the bed. "Yes I am," she told her irritated by her friend's question.

"But do you understand you have to face him everyday?" she asked.

"Do you understand this is a fucking big thing for me? I don't care if he's there," she said while zipping the bag. Brianna sighed and helped her to get the bag closed. "But it's-" she started to say but Alison cut her off. "Shut up! Will you," she shouted trying to be angry but when she saw her friend pouting her lips she cracked up.

"I'm sorry I'm just gonna miss you baby cake," Brianna told her and she cooed at her.
"You can come to see me when we're in France ...or in Germany," she told her hugging her side.

"Oh yes! A holiday in the city of love would do good for me and Daniel!" she said getting excited of the idea. "I'd love to have you with me in Paris ...as long as your hotel room isn't next to mine. I couldn't stand to hear you two shagging," she told her with straight face. Brianna's jaw dropped as she looked at her friend.

"You're gonna pay for that!" she yelled and lunged to her. Alison screamed when her friend started to tickle her sides and they fell on the floor laughing. "Who is the loud one now ha?" Brianna asked laughing and after a while they finally calmed down.

"I'll miss you too," Alison smiled at her as they were lying on the floor next to each other. She smiled back at her getting a little emotional.

"Okay," Brianna breathed and sat up. "You need to leave soon so move your ass," she said and offered her hand to help her friend up of the ground.

-----

The O2 arena was huge as she stumbled with her bags through the hallways. She felt a little lost and when she saw a familiar woman leaning against the wall she felt relieved.

The woman turned her head when she heard her walking towards her. "Alison! Hi," she greeted when she recognized her. "Hi Lou! It's been awhile..." she smiled a little nervous.

"Well yeah... Your hair is blonde!" she laughed. Lou Teasdale was the only one who would pay attention in such things as hair. Alison was surprised when she came towards her and hugged her side. At least one person was making her feel welcomed.

"Do you need any help?" Lou asked when she saw her struggling with the bags. "Yeah thanks I could use a hand," Alison laughed and Lou led the way towards where everyone else was.

The room was way too small for that many people work there. Alison shook hands with everyone before Lou offered her a coffee and they sat around the sofas. The chatted away at least an hour before Lou needed to get her stuff ready as the boys were there soon. It was their last gig in England and then they were heading to Central Europe.

"You could go to watch their sound check. I think they're starting soon," she smiled but Alison shook her head. "I think it's better if I stay here so they can focus," she said. Lou placed her hand on her knee. "I know it's none of my business... but you need to have a talk with Harry before the tour starts properly and you've to spend 24/7 with him in the small bus," she said patting Alison's knee and then getting up.

Alison knew she was right but she just didn't have a clue what to say to him. She couldn't let the management down because they needed photos for the year book of their last tour before the three years break. Also if she messed this up she knew her career would be ruined. So after all she didn't have much choice.

She plucked up some courage and got up of the coach. "Hey, do you know if Harry's here already?" she asked one of the guys there. "I think the boys getting ready for the sound check in the hall," he said pointing towards the door. She thanked him and exited the room heading to where she thought the stage was.

After asking a few people directions she found the big hall. It was huge and she couldn't even think what it would feel the perform in front of that many people. She made her way towards the stage as there were some people putting the stage ready.

"Hiii!" she jumped when Louis came in front of her out of nowhere. "Oh hi," she managed to put a smile on her face. "What's up? You coming to see our sound check?" he asked clearly being excited about the gig already. "Yeah I thought it'd be nice," she smiled and they fell in awkward silence for a while.

"Hey I know! You could come with us to have a few pints after the gig! What do you think?" he asked her suddenly. They had walked next to the stage and Louis lifted himself to sit on the stage patting the space next to him. Alison thought what to say as she sat there.

"I think I know your 'few pints'," she laughed trying to lighten the mood. "But yes I'd love to," she said then locking eyes with him.

Louis looked genuinely glad when he smiled back at her. "Great! I've kinda missed you sister," he said poking her hand and she almost fell off the stage. "Heyyy! I've kinda missed you too big bro," she laughed. Louis placed an arm around her and she put her head against his chest.

"Okay, okay enough! I don't want you to start bawling," she laughed and pushed him gently away.

"I wouldn't want to see that eather," they both were surprised when a voice spoke in front of them. Harry was standing there looking at them two and she wondered how long he had been watching them. He had a black beanie in his head and a grey sleeveless shirt which made his tattoos stood up amazingly. She noticed some new ink in his skin but tried to keep her gaze in his eyes.

"Okay," Louis said getting up of the stage. "I'll leave you two," he said and Alison tried to made up something to say to him but he disappeared quickly.

She found herself playing with her bracelet. "So... I think we should go somewhere more private," Harry said starting to walk. She got up quickly and tried to keep up behind him. She couldn't help herself as she stared at his back but when he quickly turned to face her she moved her gaze on the floor.

He motioned her to sit on the chair with his hand. As they were both sitting the silence fell between them again.

Harry looked like he wasn't going to talk before her so Alison opened her mouth to say something. "I know this is weird... and maybe not the best decision but I was offered for this..." she started to explain but he cut her off rudely. "So you decided to come here and make me feel like crap again?"

She was speechless for a moment before anger started to grow inside her. "What?" she asked with high pitched voice. He shook his head and sighed tiredly. "Whatever. You're here now so I guess we need to act friends and shit," he said getting up.

"Don't you dare leave now before we've talked this through," she took a hold on his wrist turning him around. His eyes looked emotionless. "The last time I checked you were running away from me so what's the point," he said wrenching his hand of her hold.

"Harry please," she said more calmly and looked at his eyes beggingly. He thought for a while but decided to stay there and wait for her to finish what she was trying to say. "I'm sorry okay. But this is a one in the life time offer so I just couldn't turn it down. It just... It's a huge push for my career and believe me these few years have been tough for me in many ways also with money. I really need this," she explained.

He felt sympathy towards her but he just didn't want to admit that he still cared about her. "Okay," he sighed after a minute or two. "We'll just act everything is alright for the rest of the team, right?" he asked and she nodded lightly. As he left she could breath again and even though the conversation wasn't exactly how she wanted it to be she felt still relieved it was over and done.

She watched as the boys fooled around the stage only Niall still missing. They sang a few songs jokingly while the choreographer tried to keep them down. She couldn't help but smile as she watched them. Nothing has really changed after two years.

"Niall wheeereee aaareee youuu," Louis half sang and half screamed on the microphone making everyone cover their ears. The others joined with him and it didn't take long when they were chanting Niall loudly on the mics.

"Turn the mics down!" the choreographer shouted for the man who was in charge of the sounds. He quickly switched off the microphones and Louis protested by screaming his lungs out.

Alison laughed loudly on her seat and showed thumbs up to Louis. But her laugh died quickly when she saw Niall looking at her on the corner of her eye. He didn't look too pleased and he was motioning her to follow him. She frowned but made her way to his direction.

"Shh be quiet," Niall said pointing towards the rest of the group as they were still calling his name. "What?" she was really confused because she didn't know why Niall wanted to suddenly talk to her. He led her one of the changing rooms closing the door after them.

"Niall you're scaring me right now," she laughed nervously. "You're scaring me when you appear here suddenly out of nowhere after you've been hiding for two years," he said back leaving her dumbfounded.

"Sorry that was gross... But I do have something to say to you," he said. Alison was curious what he had to say so she kept her mouth shut and waited for him to say something.

"I go straight to the point," he started and she gulped. "After... what happened and you left Harry kinda... he was really down. Like I mean really down," he said and she opened her mouth to say something but he spoke before she had a change. "He tried to forget it by drinking and smoking and you know... Women throw themselves at him so it wasn't really that hard for him to have some company sometimes," he explained and she started to feel more and more horrible with each words.

"And now he has finally got back to his feet and you're back here and he has to face you everyday. What do you think could possibly happen after the tour?" he asked raising his eyebrow. "Honestly Niall I didn't mean to-" she felt her eyes watering. "Save your apologize for him. But for now I want you to stay away from him. I've never seen him so miserable before and I don't want it to happen again so it's better if you just speak to him when you have a good reason so," he said his expression cold.

Alison felt weak under his gaze and she could just nod. "Good. I didn't want to sound too rude but I needed to do it for him. We can be friends as long as you won't hurt him again. And I'm not saying now that it wasn't hard for you too. I can't even image what you've been through. Losing a baby," he kept going while trying to read her expression. Had he gone too far?

"I understand," she breathed after a moment. Niall made a move towards the door and she closed her eyes waiting for him to exit before sniffling hard. She really thought she had got through this but little by little it seemed that she hadn't. But for now she wiped a few tears that had managed to fall down her cheeks and made her way towards the stage. She still had some work to do today as the band had their last gig at the O2 arena for a long time and she needed to capture it in photos.

Notes