Blue

Six days. It's been six days since I've talked to Harry. New Years passed in a blur, the first five days of school are mushed but the one thing I remember is waking up to a disraught Harry who told me I was drugged. I never knew how difficult it was to process that kind of information. When he drugged Emma I just kind of got angry but after feeling the way it makes you sluggish and numb, I can help but feel-there's no words actually.
Six days since I've spoken with Louis.
Six days since I've spoken with Zayn.
I don't know if I want to see him, not after what Harry told me. My mind can't process if I should believe him or fight his words and it scares me. What if it's true? What if Zayn really helped him. The scar on my leg could be from anything, Zayn could ahve nothing to do with this, this could be a another one of his lies. I pull my hair into a pony tail and pick my phone up off of my bed and stare at a sleeping Emma, I won't wake her up even though I feel the need to. Harry's name litters my call log screenbut I don't dare to click it.
I get dressed in a pair of grew sweats with the school name printed on to the front . When I make it to campus I hurry to class. My literature class is packed so I rush to the back to aviod any confrontation with anyone. I don't want to miss any days but I don't want to talk with anyone and just as class starts Zayn steps in searching the rows for me, I litterally sink into my chair to hide myself from him and shove myself under the desk, with wandering eyes wrinkling at my every move.
I hear his boots climbing the stairs and his legs stop only feet away from me.
"Norie, can I talk to you?" I cring at his voice and stay quiet but he crouches dow, staring into my eyes.
"Please, I need to talk to you." He extends his hand out to me and smiles, the most brilliant thing I've ever seen, but even the devil can be perceved handsome and I don't know whether to think of him as a Saint or the devil fueling the fire that is everything bad I've come to in the past few days.
His hand brushes against my cheek and I flinch.
"Mrs. Baragan we need to start class please take this somewhere else." My professor instructs. He gestures to the door and when I don't move he grabs my wrist.
"Sorry," He tells professor Grinling. "We'll be out of your hair." We walk for what seems like forever until we're turning into the furthest hall from my classroom.
"I'm sorry about last week. I really am but you can't avoid everyone. At least not you're friends."
"What friends?" I say breathless.
"Louis. He's done nothing. Harry was-"
"Don't." He pulls his lip between his teeth and turns from me.
"I just-I'm sorry for everything. I should of told you from the begining and I didn't and I'm sorry."
"I don't remember much so, it's fine. I just don't want to talk about."
"I understand."
"Well, I better go." I step over to walk past him but he grabs my wrist.
"Leave with me."
"No i can't."
"You can't or won't."
"Both." He sucks in a sharp breath and stares past me to the wall. "Look, let me ask you a question. Be truthful because I'm done looking like the stupid one with half of the puzzle missing."
"Fine."
"Did you help?" I can feel his body goes lip as he lets go of my wrist and stubles back. I want to know but on the other hand will it be to much to handle? Will these words be the death of me? He fidgets, pulling at the hem of his shirt, looking past me, away and finally back at me.
"Yes, but you have to hear me out." I figured he would say yes but the pain I'm feeling is worse. The way it feels as if my heart it being suffocated by my ribs is worse than any physical pain and it takes me a moment to catch my breath.
"Why?"
"I din't know. I jsut thought he would-I didn't know what he was going to do and I told him. I said we couldn't do it but it was to late he gave you the cup and I didn't know whether to tell you in fear of what he might do. I'm sorry."
"So you're a coward." I spit and watch his face sink.
"No, I wasn't afraid for me!"
"Then who?!"
"You! Are you that stupid to not see the tension between everyone. When you showed up it was just another reason for Alex to pull shit with Harry. I genuely care for, i don;t want you to get hurt and that's all he's going to do to you. Harry and Alex both."
"I trusted you. Do you know how that makes me look, how that makes me feel. To wake up and hear that you were apart of it."
"I know and I'm sorry."
"You're apology is all you have. You knew you could stop it and you just let it happen. What is your problem." I push him out of my way and hurry back to class. Everyone stops and stares at me as I throw the door open.
"Norie, you're wanted in the chanclors office." He tells me and extends a slip of paper to me.
"You may want to gab your things."

Notes