Y/N POV:
Louis and the boys were starting their tour and were scheduled to leave on the first flight to Paris tomorrow morning. They invited you to party the night before; just a small gathering of people, a couple of friends sharing some drinks. Louis, of course, was the life of the party. He went around the room, chatting up everyone and cracking jokes. He kept you close to his side, dragging you onto the dance floor when the music started. With a drink in hand, he preformed his signature dance moves, earning a few more laughs from everyone as his drink threatened to spill out of the cup.
With just one look at him, you could tell he was teetering on the edge of drunk and completely wasted.
You lost count on how many songs you’ve danced with him. His hand was always holding yours, spinning you out and back towards him. Every time another girl would ask if he wanted to dance with her, he just kept looking at you without a word. Whether he couldn’t hear her over the beat of the music or just didn’t want to; you couldn’t tell.
You were used to the glares from the other girls, the gossiping and the rumours. Everyone always assumed that there was something going on between you and Louis. I wish, you said hopefully. You knew that what you and Louis had was just a friendship, bestfriends but nothing more. But you couldn’t help for wanting more.
He shot you his drunken finger point, telling you to come closer. You did and he held you there, almost pressing up against his chest. You felt his lips at your ear, his words slightly slurring.
“Are you going to miss me,” he asked.
His body was still moving to the music, brushing up against you again and again.
“Nope,” you laughed, teasing him. You both knew it was a lie.
“Oh really,” he chuckled. He pulled back a bit so you could see that mischievous look growing in his eyes. His lips were pressed together, trying to hide a smile.
Without another word, he had his strong arms wrapped around your legs. He threw you over his shoulder and started carrying you away from the dancing crowd.
With uncontrollable laughter, you begged for him to put you down. “Excuse me, everyone! I need to show this girl what she’ll be missing for the next two years,” he shouted. Everyone gave you both amused looks, making way for Louis to exit.
You couldn’t see where he was taking you, but you continued to kick your legs wildly, hitting his back with your hands. Your laughter didn’t stop until he finally set you down on your feet, back against the smooth white wall of the entrance hallway. The music was still loud, but it was easier to hear Louis now. You could see the crowd of your friends down the halls, piled into the main room.
You could smell the alcohol on his breath. “Tell me you’re going to miss me,” he said, putting his hands against the wall, one on each side of your head.
“No,” you smirked.
The smile grew on his face. “You just love to tease me, don’t you?”
Maybe it was your imagination, but you hear a second meaning to what he asked. Before you had a chance to think it over, his lips were trailing over the skin of your neck.
“You’re going to miss me,” he mumbled as his finger tips brushed over your shoulder.
Your back was flat against the wall now has he inched closer. His body was pressed hard against yours. You could feel your hands shaking a bit, but you ignored it. You had no clue what Louis was doing, or if he was even sober enough to know what he was doing.
“You’re going to miss this,” he barely whispered, pressing his lips to the base of your neck. “And this,” he said as his hands explored your body. His forehead was leaning against yours, his breath coming in uneven. The smell of alcohol was overpowering but you ignored it.
His voice was rough, almost like a growl. “And you’re really going to miss this.”
You felt his lips brush against yours, his hands tightening on your hips. You parted your lips with his, ready for what you knew was coming.

LOUIS’ POV:
It’s like you couldn’t get closer to her fast enough. You were practically crushing her up against the wall, but she didn’t protest and you didn’t stop. You’re head was swimming, but you weren’t sure if it was from the alcohol or just the sheer pleasure of the taste of her lips. The alcohol gave you the confidence you needed, (because if she didn’t feel the same way, you could just blame what you were doing on all the drinks you’ve consumed tonight) but what you were doing now was all up to you. And Y/N knew it too. Her lips moved with yours, forceful and eager. All that was going through your mind was her, you were completely intoxicated by her.
You pulled back slightly, unlocking your lips from hers. The smile on your face spread wider as you looked at her. She was breathless and shocked but still managed to keep that teasing look in her eyes.
You wanted to tell her every thing. You wanted to finally tell her how much she really means to you, how badly you needed her to be yours. You wanted to shout it out over the blaring music, making sure she can hear you loud and clear, because, once you get on that plane tomorrow, she won’t hear it again until you come back from-
The tour, you remembered suddenly. The two year tour. You felt your smile fading, twisting into a frown that felt so wrong when she was around.
You wanted to tell her every thing, but would it mean anything if you were still going to leave her by herself for two years? While you’re out on tour surrounded by girls and drowning in rumours while she’s here trying to figure out what’s true and what’s just a story for the tabloids? You were sure you’d still love her in two years, but a lot can happen while you’re off touring the world.
I can’t hurt my best friend.
I can’t hurt the girl I love.
Y/N POV:
You saw the frown on his face and began to worry. He was quiet, deep in thought about something at he stared at you with the saddest of looks in his eyes. Did I do something wrong?
Before you could ask him what you did, he began to pull away from you.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“Don’t be,” you said, trying to pull him back. But he just took another step away from you.
“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
You opened your mouth to argue with him, but he cut you off again. This time, his voice dead and cold.
“It was a mistake,” his eyes were framed by his furrowing brows, his mouth set in a thin line. “I’m drunk and I wasn’t thinking. It should have never happened.”
And just like that, leaving you there in your own confusion, he walked away.
You didn’t know what had made him pull away, but you knew the alcohol had nothing to do with it.
You weren’t exactly sure how it happened, but you were certain it wasn’t a mistake.
***
Despite your better judgement, you woke up early and dragged yourself to the airport. Louis left you last night without an explanation, but he wasn’t leaving today without a goodbye.
You found him fumbling with his carry-on luggage, about to board the plane. His back was turned to you, the muscles on his back standing out from the thin blue fabric of his t-shirt. You tapped lightly on his shoulder.
“Need some help?” You offered.
At the sound of your voice, he dropped his bags in shock. With cuss under his breath, he turned around to face you. You thought, for a moment, that you saw a smile creeping up on his face. But within seconds, his face was a hard mask.
“I didn’t think you’d come,” he said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck roughly as he looked down at his feet. “I really am sorry about-”
You raised your hand as if to say whatever. “I didn’t come here for another apology, Louis.”
“Are you here to yell at me, then?” he asked, a rude and clipped voice.
You glared at him, your eyes swimming in angry tears that threatened to spill over. “I came here to tell you that I’m going to miss you.”
He didn’t even look up, so you kept talking.
“I’m going to miss not being able to call you at 2 o’clock in the morning just because I want to hear your voice. I’m going to miss the way you’d call me after I leave your house just to make sure I got home safe. The way you make me laugh, the way my clothes smell like your cologne, seeing your clothes tossed on my floor from the nights you’d sleep over; I’m going to miss it all ,” you paused to take a deep breath. “And I’m going to miss the way you kissed me last night, even if it meant nothing to you.”
He finally looked up at you then. He looked like he wanted to say something, and you were holding your breath until he said anything. His eyes were rounded in sadness, silently pleading with you. He reached out for you, grabbing you hand and tugging you close.
He wrapped you in his arms, hugging you to his chest. Your head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck where it always has as you wrapped your arms tightly around his waist. Your tears were turning his light blue shirt into a dark navy, but you didn’t care.
“Now boarding Flight 457 nonstop to Paris,” you both heard echo through the airport.
He pulled back to look at you, his fingers tangled with yours. The rims of his eyes were red. Say something, you silently prayed. Say anything.
“I don’t know how I’m going to be away from you for two years,” he sighed, tucking a piece of loose hair behind your ear. “You’re my best friend, Y/N.”
Friend.
Nothing more.
Just friends.
“That’s it,” you whispered, not really a question but more like a realization.
“That’s all I can give you,” he answered anyways. You were too angry to hear the hint of a lie in his voice.
He gathered up his things and gave you a kiss on the cheek. “Goodbye, Y/N.”
* * *
It’s been six months since the boys left to go on tour. You had no clue what country they were in or even what side of the world they were on. For months, you’ve been sending Louis texts and leaving voicemails every time he would ignore one of your calls but you’ve never gotten a reply back. Its been rumoured that he’s busy with a new girl he met; Candice, an actress who’s beautiful and rich enough to be able to follow Louis all around the world if that’s what he wanted (and he probably did). There’s no point in fighting when you’ve already been knocked out, is what you told yourself. So you decided that today would be the last voicemail you’d leave for him. One last message, one last try.
The boys were all over every magazine, radio station and TV talk show. After trying to find something better to watch on TV, you gave in and decided to watch one of their interviews that so happened to be playing on 5 different channels. It was a replay of the live interview that was recorded yesterday.
You flopped down on the couch, phone in hand. You couldn’t help but take in how much Louis has changed in just six months; new tattoos were peaking under his shirt, stubble clinging to his chin. As you began to dial his number, by heart, you heard the perky interviewer ask the same questions you know they’ve heard over and over again.
“So,” she cheered, clapping her hands in excitement. “Who’s still single?”
The phone began to ring as 4 out of the 5 boys raised their hands. Louis still hand both hands on his lap. You felt your breath hitch in your throat.
“Oooh, Louis! So the rumours about you and Candice are true, huh?”
“Of course they’re true,” you mumbled to yourself, rolling your eyes. The phone kept ringing.
Louis gave a chuckle. “Candice is a nice girl, but not the one for me.”
You felt like the air was stuck in your throat. Everything was silent except for the ringing of the phone.
Louis took a big breath, his face breaking into an effortless smile. “I’m in love with my best friend.”
You didn’t hear the rest of the interview. You were totally oblivious to Harry’s “Aw, Louis! I love you too” side joke that made the audience burst into laughter because right at the moment, you heard a voice come from the other end of the phone.
“Y/N,” Louis sighed into the phone. You could hear the smile in his voice. You couldn’t even get a word in before the words burst out of him like a floodgate. “I must have been mental for lying to you and I’m so sorry. I wish I could have told you how much I was going to miss the way you cuddle up to me in your sleep and the way you smile when you say my name. You mean more to me than you know and I wish I could have told you all of this in person.”
You were stunned into silence, your mouth flapping open and trying to form words that wouldn’t come out.
“Two years may seem like a long time, but I’ll wait an eternity for you,” he promised. “I’ve learned something from being a part from you for so long…”
“Which is…,” you asked, finally finding words.

“From across the room or across the world, you’re still the only girl for me. I love you.”

Notes