Beats dropped onto the dance floor and I could feel the music run through my veins as his fingers traced up my sides, my skirt flirting with my thighs and his breath trickling down my neck with soft words of promises and better days. A few shots and a throbbing headache, we were alone in a bathroom cubicle lips locked and hearts thriving. Tall, dark and handsome was all I could have imagined for. Snorts of cocaine by pleasure seekers could be heard off the rims next door; I was shaky, cold, a total mess. Fists of hair and tongues dancing to god knows what, I felt a pull on the back of my dress… superman had come at the wrong time.


When you’ve been told that someone you know as died, you have the thought on repeat inside your mind until you realise they’re gone. Funnily enough, this time the person wasn’t dead, just erased. The cafe we sat at was dark, covered from ceiling to floor in posters of fine art and music only your parents would enjoy. Light filtered gently through the entrance and the booth seats we’d claimed were uncomfortable - just like the last 3 dozen times we’d met here.

“The least you could do is say thank you.”

I let my fingers wrapped around the warm mug of hot chocolate and sighed gently keeping the sound to myself. Louis and I never had a proper relationship - our friendship was built on dirty obligations, lies and family values the Tomlinson’s and Elwood’s had in common. My brother pulled a favour for his father, he’d pull a favour for my mother and so on. Bumping into each other last night was pure coincidence. Limelight wasn’t a club I thought anyone from Chelsea would be at.

“Thank you for what?”, I asked, looking up at him. My eyes peering through my bangs.
“Being your knight in shining armour.”
“Am I meant to believe in happy endings Louis?”
“No.. but…”, he stuttered, his eyes darting around in a search for words, “Do you like silent movies?”, he asked changing the subject.
“What, like the ones with subtitles?”, I asked taking a sip.
“Mhmm.”
“I hate them.”
“Me too..”, he agreed, “All on account of the fact they..”
“Don’t have happy endings?”, I suggested raising an eyebrow.
“That’s it. No fairytale.”

Chuckling to myself, I shook my head, pushing my bangs out of my eyes and smiled over at the older boy. We were only a few months apart but I always felt that our maturity set us up for years. Perhaps its just the way we both saw life - dry, impossible and a dream we’d both never wake up from.

“You got plans for tonight?”, I asked quietly, breaking the silence we sat in and took a last sip, finishing off my cup. Just as always, Louis’ tea had gotten cold and overflowed with the amount of sugar he’d added to it.
“No”, he responded bluntly.
“But why.. it’s Christmas time”, I added sweetly. A smirk made its way across my face but didn’t stay for long. They never did.
“That’s exactly why”, Louis continued with the same attitude.
“No need to be a grinch mister, we might have to watch Miracle on 34th street tonight. Get you into the spirit!”
“I’m not being a grinch Bella, it’s a known fact nothing good ever happens around christmas. It’s just a hallmark holiday.”

Only minutes seemed to pass between our final words and making our way out to the snowy streets of Chelsea. I tugged my scarf around my neck gently choking myself yet keeping warm. Perhaps it’d make a nice temporary noose if the time arose. Cheeks flushing primrose and my skin turning a pale white, I shoved my hands into my pockets keeping my hands warm.

“I guess I’ll see you later hey Bella…”
“Sure Louis… sure.”

We’d never been ones for goodbyes, in fact - I can’t ever remember a conversation we’d ever had with that word included. I knew he’d be around to see my brother Thomas later that night - he’d sneak through the garage like he always did and they’d smoke until the early hours of the morning coming up with time wasting plans they’d never put into action. Coming back from my own daydream into reality, I felt the urge to say something.. break the silence I’d awkwardly once again created and leave on a high note. Watching Louis take a cigarette out of his jacket pocket and light up, slowly wandering away in the opposite direction I tried to think quick.. it could be an only chance - not that I believed in them.

“Hey Louis..”
“Yes Bella?”, he responded, turning around to face me.
“Miracles happen on Christmas, everyone knows that shit..”

A with matching smiles, we parted our separate ways.

Notes

Let me know what you think! I'm also looking for a co-writer if anyones interested <3