Feeling Safe With Danger

He opened up the passenger car and threw me into the seat.

Ouch.

But I didn't say anything, deep down I knew I deserved his rough handling.

"Where are you taking me? My house is in this neighborhood."
"Shut up."

I decided not to argue back with him. He was obviously fuming, not that I'm surprised or anything.

I looked out the window as he focused on the road.
We were stopped at a red light. I looked at the sidewalk to see an elderly couple holding hands taking a walk. The elderly man was holding the elderly woman's purse, and he had a dozen red roses in hand. She kept smiling at him and glancing at the flowers that he was obviously carrying for her.

I sighed, wishing Harry and I could be in such a place.


I looked down at my legs. I was only in my panties and bra with Harry's shirt on, so my skin was exposed. I looked at the light scratches that decorated my legs, reminders of last night.

I closed my eyes as I held onto the fear I had experience last night. I placed my hand to my neck and winced at the soreness on my neck. It's like I could feel Harry attacking my neck all over again.

I wasn't sure what was going on, but one thing is for sure; I still didn't know what Harry wanted to do with me last night, and I guess I was going to find out soon.

I began to cry again, I was trying to hide it from Harry, but I sniffed several times, signaling my tears.

I caught him rolling his eyes.
It's like he doesn't even care anymore. I wanted so badly to see the sweet caring side of Harry, but all I saw was this hurt angry asshole side of him.

I recognized where he had pulled into: His apartment.

He got out of the car, not bothering to help me out. I sighed as I pushed open the car door and followed him.
Once we got into the apartment, he locked the door behind us. I just stood there looking down at my feet waiting for whatever it was he had in store for me.
He just turned away and walked towards the kitchen. I kept standing there for a few minutes, unable to move.
I heard a cupboard door slam, then I heard glass shattering.
I ran to the kitchen to see glass shattered all over the counter, some of it had fallen onto the counter. Harry had a hold on the counter, he was trying to steady his breathing, but I could see it was hard for him to control his anger.

He must have heard me come in because his head whipped around and his eyes met mine. He reached for something, a bottle of clear liquid. I realized it was Vodka.

He walked towards me.
"Look at what you've done to me!!!" He ripped off the bottle cap and was about to down the alcohol. If he got drunk, he would have even more power in him to hurt me, rape me, do whatever it is that he was gonna do.

"What are you gonna do to me?! Please don't hurt me!"
Right at the bottle reached his lips, his anger subsided.
"What?" He stated rather confused.
I broke down, falling to the floor letting sob after sob escape my mouth.
I heard a loud crash, realizing Harry had thrown the Vodka bottle against the wall.
He immediately scooped me up in his strong arms and carried me to his bedroom.
I heard him sigh as he gently placed me on his bed.
I winced waiting for the blow he was gonna give me, but instead I felt his warm hand press up to my cheek.
"Vana, please look at me." He pleaded weakly.
I braced myself to see the anger on his face as I opened up my eyes, but I didn't see it.

All I saw was concern.....and guilt.
"Harry?"

"I'm not gonna hurt you."

"You aren't? I don't believe you!"

"I could never...not on purpose." I looked away from him, his gaze was overwhelming.

"B-but last night, y-you scared me."

"I just didn't want you run away. I didn't mean to frighten you that much."

"Then what were you getting out of your car? A gun?"

"I was angry." Harry admitted.

"So it was a gun you were getting?!" I cried.

"What? No! I don't have a gun!"

"What kind of weapon was it then?"

"There was no weapon!" I cowered as his voice boomed around the room. He was obviously getting frustrated.

"But..."

"Will you shut up for once and let me explain?"
I nodded.

"I was telling you the story about the girl."

"Yeah, I remember her." I rolled my eyes.

"I said shut up."

"Sorry."

"Anyway, you got offended that I had been chasing after this girl practically my entire life, and you seemed to think that I led you on. Well, what you didn't realize is that you are that girl."

"Wait, what?"

"I got angry when you didn't catch on, because we made a promise a long time ago that we would always be together and protect one another."

My eyes widened as a memory came rushing to the front of my mind.

*Flashback* (Harry's POV retelling the story to Vana)

"Dad, I'm gonna go out to play, ok?"
"Be back before it gets dark, son."
I marched outside eager to play around with my best friend, Niall. Niall told me that after he finished his homework and chores he would come out to play, so I just had to wait for him.
That's when I saw the most beautiful girl my eyes had ever seen.
She was coming out of her house with a bag filled with something. I don't know why I had never seen her, but I knew her family was moving houses the next day.
I literally just stared at for minutes, I loved the way her curly brown hair flew everywhere, and then she noticed me.
The second we made eye contact, I felt my heart race for the first time. I got sweaty too.
Of course, being the immature boy that I was, I yelled the first thing that came to my mind.
"Hey, ugly!"
She rolled her eyes and looked away and she proceeded to play with the items in her bag.
She kept looking at me and glaring, so I felt bad. I guess I made her mad.
Being the young, charming man that I was I decided to apologize to her.
I walked over and said, "I'm sorry. I actually think you are pretty."
Her eyes beamed up at me and she smiled, showing me that she had a missing tooth.
"It's ok. I forgive you."
"So what do you say, wanna be friends?"
She shrugged.
"Yeah, I guess so, but I'm moving houses tomorrow so I can only be your friend for a day."
"What school do you go to?"
"Maple Glenn."
"Same here! So we can be friends for more than a day."
She smiled at me and nodded. I looked at the contents of her baggy.
"Are those rings? Where'd you get those?"
"A toy box at a restaurant. My mom put a quarter in it and these came out."

I paused. "Do you wanna get married?"
"Sure, but how we do get married?"
"Well, we have to wait until we are older, but we could each have a ring as a promise that we will always be together...maybe always even love each other. I always thought love was gross, but now I'm thinking it could be a good thing. Maybe it's not gross if it's with you."
"Love is a good thing."
With that we gave each other rings. There was a small one and a big one, but both were far too big for either of us.
"I guess we will have to wait until we are bigger for them to fit. Either way, just don't lose it. It'll be like a symbol of our promise to each other." I continued, "Can I kiss you?"
The little girl nodded her head, we both leaned into each other and then....
*THUD*
"OW!" the girl cried out.
I looked over to see Niall grinning ear to ear, he had just thrown a ball at her! He was laughing and pointing at her when I walked over to him and said, "Don't mess with my girl." He hurt her and I didn't want him to be my best friend anymore.

"Okay!" He said. I decided he was still my best friend.

I turned to the girl, "I will always protect you."
She nodded. "I need to go back home, my mom is calling me in for dinner. It was nice meeting you."
"You too...hey! What's your name?"
She turned around to face me, "Vanessa but most people call me Vana."
She walked into the house and the door shut closed after I heard something fall on her driveway.
"Uuugghh, I forgot to tell her my name! Oh, well. Maybe I could tell her at school."
I looked at the driveway and jogged over to it. I saw that she had dropped the ring, so I picked it up and decided to give it back to her the next time I saw her.

I sighed as I thought of the beautiful girl with the beautiful brown eyes that I had just pledged myself to.

*End of flashback, back to Vana's POV*

"The only problem was that when she moved houses, she ended up moving schools. I was pretty bummed about it. I didn't see her again until one day in 8th grade in a store. I ended up following her car home on my bike. I found out where she lived, and found out we would both end up in high school together, but she seemed to have moved in when she entered as a freshman. She never took a second glance at me. She forgot about me, but I never did. I got angry, really angry. My dad...he passed away. I guess it was too much. I started lashing out, at first Niall kept trying to keep me away from all the girls, the fighting, the bad grades, the alcohol, the........anyway eventually I brought him down with me, corrupting him. We pulled other people down with us. I started sleeping with girl after girl to forget about you. It sometimes worked, but I kept seeing you at school with Caleb, and I would get angry, but I never did anything about it. I knew you loved him, even if it was just as a friend, and it would upset you if I hurt him. One day I finally walked up to you, I was really pissed at something someone said. The first thing to come out of my mouth was that you had a nice ass. You got angry, and I beat myself up for my immature behavior. I followed you, always trying to protect you. All the fights I got in either had to do with you or someone egging me on about how big of a jerk I was...how big of a jerk I am. Actually, one fight in particular comes to mind. This one basketball player threw a ball at your head in sophomore year. I got so mad at him, because it reminded me of the time Niall threw a ball at you. It reminded me of the time that you forgot about, when we pledged ourselves to each other.....Then I got kicked out of school. I ended up getting my GED with Niall and some other friends. We ran away from our homes and got involved with Andrew. Two years later we came back, then I saw you at your graduation party. I didn't know what to do. You were still as breathtaking as ever. But I realized Caleb wasn't with you, so I figured he was sick. And then I saw that blonde guy all over you, and then Andrew grabbed you and I......." He shook his head.
"Last night when I went to the car, I went to get the rings. I've kept them over the years. I thought if you saw them you would remember, but when I got back to the tent. You were gone.......again."

He looked down as I tried to absorb everything he tried to say to me. He looked so vulnerable, and I was the cause of his fragility right now.
I tried blinking away the tears as guilt rushed over me again. How could I forget our promise? It seemed silly at the time, so I ended up forgetting, never once remembering my first encounter with Harry. But he didn't find it silly, he was serious.
I leaned in to Harry's face, I gently placed my hands on his slumped shoulders. His face was down, so I had to bend into it to find his lips with mine. When our lips met, he pushed away, but not before a jolt electricity shot through my body.

"I can't Vana...I just can't. You were about to have sex with Lane." He said as I bit down on my lip.
His eyes widened.
"Please don't tell me you already had sex with him last night. Please don't tell me I'm too late. No, no, please no." His voice was broken.

Did he still see me as a whore?

Notes

WOW. That was a lot.

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