Ashlynn’s POV.

It was 4:06 AM and I was wide-awake in my bed with my laptop sitting in front of me. I pulled up my Photoshop to edit the few pictures I had left of Kendall. Don needed them in 5 hours and I wanted to get them sent in so I wouldn’t have to worry about it any longer. I was going through her photos examining every bit of them.She was beautiful and tall something I would never be…well tall at least. If I’m being totally honest constantly working with models put me on the insecure bus every once in a while and I didn’t enjoy it. I will never understand why Harry decided he wanted to be with me more than her but I’m glad he did.

“Hey” a groggy voice interrupted my focus.

“Oh, hi.” I said back.

“You alright?” he asked me as he sat up next to me.

“Yeah. Just trying to get some work done. Is the light bothering you? I can go to the other room.” I offered.

“No it’s not bothering me. Just didn’t know what you were doing. Who’s photos you working on?” he asked me.

“Kendall’s…they came out really beautiful. I’m actually surprised how wonderful they turned out.” I admitted not taking my focus from the screen.

“I want someone to take pictures of you…If I find a photographer to take photos of you, will you let them?” he asked me causing me to laugh.

“Uhm no way. I’m not photogenic whatsoever. Good try though.”

“Are you kidding? You’re beautiful. I could look at pictures of you all day.” Harry told me. What was wrong with him?

“Ew. Please don’t. I’m not a model…I’m short and awkward and big boned. “ I admitted my insecurities to him.

“Why do you think I love you so much? Because you’re not what everyone else is. You’re perfect Ashlynn. Don’t be like that.” He told me.

“k. Sorry.”Was all I said back. I felt angry the more and more he would tell me I was perfect the crappier I felt cause I knew I wasn’t. I knew I wasn’t worthy.

“K? That’s all you’re going to say?” he was getting mad. What did he want me to say?

“Yep.” Was all I said back. God I suck at talking.

“Seriously? Have a conversation with me.” I did it now.

“Harry. I can’t I need to finish these. “ I snapped back at him. He rolled his eyes at me and I grabbed my computer and left the room.

I’ve never really walked out on him like that. I just needed this time. I don’t think he understand that just because you tell someone they’re beautiful doesn’t mean they believe you.

I found my way to my Moms room I knew she would be awake. When I pushed through the door she wasn’t in there. She was nowhere to be found. I then heard something downstairs, I made my way down the staircase to see none other then my mother in our kitchen baking.

“What are you doing? It’s 4AM!” I told her which caused her to laugh.

“I know how to tell time baby girl! I just couldn’t sleep.” She explained.

“Yeah…me either. I need to finish these pictures so I can get them into Don on time” I told her.

“Pull up a seat then and get to work. How do you like the new job anyway?” she asked.

“I mean ya know…” I began as I pulled out a seat from the island of chairs where she was mixing batters. “I love it. I basically get to do whatever I want and Shannon and Don rock! You would really like Shannon. “ I explained more to her about how much I was loving what I was doing in London and how I felt like I was actually getting somewhere in my life.

“What about that Kendall girl? How did that photo-shoot go?” She asked the dreaded question.

“I mean as well as it could of gone. Ya know? She’s beautiful and her pictures are gorgeous” I told her as I turned my computer screen to face her so she could see what I was talking about. “I mean none of the rest matters. Just how her photos turn out right? It’s just ironic how she’s the girl who was kissing on Harry and then two weeks later I’m stuck taking photos of her.”I was now venting.

“Life has a strange way of working itself out sometimes Grace. Harry is your boyfriend not hers. Don’t forget that.” She reminded me as if I had for some strange reason forgotten.

“I know… I kind of snapped at him a few minutes ago. “ I now admitted the situation prior.

I explained the whole thing to her where she told me that she understood where I was coming from but that it didn’t give me a right to snap at him and that I needed to apologize. Shit.

“I’ll talk to him in the morning.” I told her.

“Just go get him now. I doubt he’s asleep after having a tiff with you.” She was probably right.

I made my way back up the stairs to see Harry sitting up in bed with Shelly with the TV turned on going through my DVR.

“Hey…” I awkwardly said as I climbed into bed.

“You done working?” he asked and his words almost made me sick knowing I had hurt him.

“No…just wanted to come say sorry for snapping like that.” I apologized his eyes still focused on the TV not leaving the screen.

“K.” Was all he said in how low morbid mono tone voice that stabbed me in my heart.

“Okay…well we’re baking downstairs if you want to come bake also. If not I’ll just see you in the morning I guess.” I told him as I turned around and walked out of the door back to the hallway. I couldn’t even be in my own room. His cold shoulder was cold and it made me never want to fight with him again.

I made my way back down the stairs again to see my mom still baking. This woman was crazy.

“What did he say?” she asked.

“Nothing. ‘K.’ Meaning he’s still pissed.” I told her now upset.

“Well at least you apologized just give him time to cool off. “ she explained.

“Yeah I guess.” I said as I continued working on Kendall’s photos.


Harry’s POV.

I was upset to say the least I knew she didn’t mean it and I knew I probably pushed her to that point and I knew right now more then ever she needed me to be the good kind caring boyfriend I usually am but it’s just so aggravating when you are so in love with someone and they don’t even see there own worth. I wouldn’t change one thing about Ashlynn; she was everything I always wanted. I just don’t understand how she didn’t agree with me on anything positive that had to do with her.

When we get in arguments or tiffs like this I always take myself back to Jayci’s words that one-day when Ashlynn wad mad at me about a comment I had made towards her.

“Harry, you have to remember what kind of relationship Ashlynn was in prior before yours. As her best friend let me tell you that it's a huge fucking deal that she is even with you. Do you even know her sexual history? Of course you don't cause if you did you would think before you speak. Joke or not. That’s not cool.”

Ashlynn had been constantly reminded growing up that she wasn’t good enough from her shit relationship with that asshole Brendan to dealing with her Dad for the past few years there’s no wonder she doesn’t think highly of herself. I needed to apologize.

I went downstairs to hear laughing coming from the kitchen. I followed the noise to see Ashlynn and her Mom talking while she was baking and Ashlynn was sitting on the counter top.

“Hey ladies.” I said towards them both and making eye contact with my love.

“Hey Harry! Can’t sleep either?” Her mom asked me.

“Just seems to be a lot on my mind I supposed.” I told her still staring at my girl.

“Seems we all have that problem. I’m going to run down to the basement to get some more flour!” her mom said obviously giving us our few minutes of alone time.

I looked at Ashlynn who now had her head down and playing with her nails not making eye contact with me. I had clearly hurt her feelings when I didn’t say anything when she apologized. I made my way to the counter where she was sitting and hopped up and sat next to her.We sat there in silence for a second before I finally said something.

“Did you finish those pictures and get them sent in?” I asked a bit more chipper then before.

“Yeah.” Was all she said.

“Good…so we can talk now?” I asked of her.

“I guess if you want to.” She told me still staring at her fingers.

“Okay, well I’m sorry for being short with you when you came into the room to apologize. That wasn’t very nice of me and I feel like an asshole.” I admitted causing her to pout less.

“You’re right…it wasn’t very nice. “ she said to me with her voice shaky.

“I know, can you forgive me?” I asked her.

“Of course I can. I love you. I’m sorry for being snappy.” She apologized again.

“It’s okay! I know I was bothering you while you were working. We good?” I asked her hoping this would be the end of it.

“Yeah. We’re good. “ She told me as she hopped off the counter and made her way to the fridge to get a drink.

“Then why do I feel like you’re still upset about something?” I asked her hoping she wouldn’t shut me out.

Her phone rang from the kitchen counter next to me; I looked down before handing it to her to see it was Don.I ignored the call, seemed like the right thing to do at the second that was until I saw her face.

“Why did you do that? It was work! Give me my phone!” she yelled.

“No I want to talk.” I yelled back.

“You don’t see me ignoring your calls so we can talk. Last time I checked work usually came first for you. “ She snapped again grabbing her phone from me and stomping off to the back porch where I let her cool off while she called her boss.

“What happened now?” Her Mom Rose asked when she came in through the basement door.

“I’m an idiot who can never do anything right. That’s it. Nothing new.” I told her as I held my head in my hands.

“You have to remember Harry. Her work is her life, without that job she won’t even be in London. She needs it. “ She told me calmly. “I know you love her but Ashlynn is the most independent child I know. Got to give her legroom to breathe.She would run across the world for you, it’s just a phone call.” Rose talked to me like I was her son…in a way my mom would talk things out with me.“ You know when I call to check on her…you are all she ever talks about. She always says ‘Mom…I never thought I would be good enough for him. Now I’m here and he’s mine and I’m afraid to blink.’ She loves you Harry.” Now I felt even guiltier.


Ashlynn’s POV.

I don’t know what had gotten into Harry. Maybe it was him being somewhere new and he wasn’t fully comfortable but it was starting to freak me out.He knew how important this job was to me. I sat on the back porch freezing as I dialed Don’s number back.

“There is our cover photographer! Ignoring my calls are we?” he asked me first thing when I answered.

“Sorry Don…I uhm…I dropped my phone and it must have ended the call. “ I lied.

“That’s alright, I just got Kendall’s photo. You did it again; they are flawless in every way. I’m proud of you for looking past her bitchyness and taking these photos.” He told me. I was relieved he loved them. I needed him too. “Also, we understand that you are going to need some time at home with your family to deal with the loss of your father so take as much time as you need, we will be here waiting when you come back!” he told me. I was relieved knowing I was in no rush to get back to London.

I heard the door creak and Harry’s loud footsteps walking towards me. He sat next to me handing me a cup of hot chocolate and then wrapped a blanket around the both of us wrapping his arm around me and pulling me closer into him. I leaned my head into his shoulders when my eyes began to water at the thought of us fighting and me losing him.

“What’s going on with us?” I asked him clearly concerned.

“I don’t know…maybe it’s the time zone change.” He joked but I didn’t laugh.

“I’m serious Harry…” I looked up at him.

“I know you are. Let’s start with why you’re upset.” Great. I had to go first.

“I’m not normally insecure about anything. I am who I am for a reason. But it’s hard when I see these girls who want to be with you for all the wrong reasons and they’re drop dead gorgeous. I know you love me and want only me…but sometimes I feel like it’s all too good to be true.” I admitted now tearing up slowly more.

“I know what you mean. And I’m sorry if it seems like I’m not 100% invested in us. But I am. You’re allowed to be insecure, it’s just frustrating to me that you don’t see yourself the way I do. But I’m never going to stop reminding you how perfect I think you are. “ He told me before kissing my forehead.

“I love you.”

“I love you so much more.” He challenged me.

“You win. Can we go back to bed now?” I asked me as we saw the sun slowly rise.

“PLEASE CAN WE?!” he pouted.

So we did.

Notes