Ashlynn's POV.

I left the room with my phone in hand. A part of me wanted to throw my phone against the wall hoping my father would feel it on the other side. Another part of me wanted to answer it so I could just cry to my father. I had so many emotions built up and so much anger and resentment towards him that I couldn't even fathom it. When I finally decided to answer the call, it had ended. I sat on mine and Harry's bed and let out a sigh almost in relief that I didn't answer. Then he called again.

"Hello?" I said into the phone my voice shaking.

"Ashlynn. baby is that you?" he said. Nope..I hated him. It was anger. Pure anger.

"Well this is my number."I said as rudely as possible.

"Happy Birthday Princess." he told me with joy in his voice.

"Thanks." now ever more pissed off.

"So when were you going to tell me you moved to London?" he asked as if he had some sort of right to know things about my life.

"Uhm. Never." I told him, that would piss him off.

"Excuse me young lady." yep he's ticked now.

"I said NEVER. I was never going to tell you. Last time I checked it wasn't any of your fucking business and last time I checked you wanted nothing to do with me. So there's that." I told him now laughing.

"Don't you fucking talk to me like that young lady. I'm your father." he yelled back at me.

"No, you're not. You haven't been my father for 4 months. You lost that privellage when you told me you didn't love me anymore. Sorry. Not sorry." I told him now proud of how brave I was being for standing up to him.

"Ashlynn Grace Martinez..don't you dare talk to me like that! You get your ass on a plane right now and you come home." he demanded of me.

"NO! I HAVE A LIFE HERE. I HAVE AN AMAZING JOB I HAVE AMAZING FRIENDS AND AN AMAZING BOYFRIEND. I BELONG HERE." I yelled at him letting him know how much I had.

" I don't fucking care what you have. And that Styles boy..he's no good Grace." he told me. That was the final straw.

"Oh my god, shut the fuck up. You don't know anything. You did this to me, you're the reason I applied for this internship here. You know I tried killing myself after all of your bullshit. YOU DID THAT TO ME. So don't come here playing all nice to get in good with me just to tell me that my life is crap. I'm done. I'm 21 fucking years old and can do whatever I please. So just stop." I told him now in tears when I realized how much damage he had really done to me.

"You should have tried harder at killing yourself." his words stung.

"Well maybe next time I will. You know I get that from you...the not succeeding at things like that." with those words I hung up the phone.

I was so upset and crying so hard after I hung up that I puked for 5 minutes till I finally had nothing left in my system.I sat on the floor against the wall in the restroom staring at the razor that I swore I would never touch again. I was holding it in my hand just staring at it. Wondering how something so small could hurt so much. Wondering why the man I loved so much couldn't love me back. Wondering why I could never get anything right. 10 minutes passed when Harry and Jayci walked in the room looking for me.


Harry's POV.

Jayci and I finished our conversation and decided to go upstairs to check on Ashlynn. We walked into our room to see nothing. I walked into the restroom to see my beautiful girl sitting on the floor staring at a razor that she had in her hand.I took a deep breath and then I kneeled down to her to take the razor from her hands setting it on top of the vanity.

"I wasn't going to." she said. Her words very convincing but I still really worried.

"I know." I told her as I swooped my arms underneath her picking her up carrying her bridal style to our bed sitting her next to Jayci. Jayci put her arm around her and Ashlynn cracked. She cried into Jayci's arms and held my hand at the same time.
It reminded me of the time I found my mom crying in her bed after my Dad left. I could never wrap my head around how someone who was supposed to love us just left and wanted nothing to do with us. Like now, I couldn't understand how someone who raised his own daughter could tell her he didn't love her, could tell her that she was worthless.

This girl that was holding my hand...she was the furthest thing from worthless.

"Why doesn't he love me?" She looked at Jayci asking her.

"Because he's a sad excuse for a man babe. He doesn't deserve your love" Jayci told her still holding her in her arms.

There was a knock at the door, I went to open it.

"Hey man, everything ohkay here?" Niall asked me concerned about our disappearance.

"Uhm..not really. What's up?" I asked him while I pushed my hair back.

"We are all getting ready to go to the lake. Y'all comin?" He asked me.

"Uhm. Jayci will meet you out there. Wait for her so she doesn't have to walk alone," I told him winking.

"alright, I'll be downstairs." he told me as he walked away.

"Hey Jayci, go to the lake. I'll sit with her." I told Jayci with pleading eyes.

"Harry, it's fine. I can stay." she said not wanting to leave her best friends side.

"No. Go. You need to get to know Niall more before this weekend ends. I'll be fine. " Ashlynn told her. I was so amazed with how selfless she was. Even after her dad calling her and ruining her birthday she still wanted the best for Jayci.

"Fine. But only because Harry is here" she said towards Ashlynn now standing up off the bed. " I love you. " she said when she pulled her into a hug.

"I know. I love you more." Ashlynn said back to her best friend before she walked out of the room.

I got onto our bed. and leaned against the headboard with my legs straight out. Ashlynn crawled in between them and layed her head on my chest and played with my fingers as I ran my other hand through her hair. We layed there like that for about 5 minutes before she finally spoke.

"Did Jayci tell you everything?" she asked now a bit calmer then before.

"yeah...she did." I said back to her.

"I was going to tell you." she began.

"Babe, don't worry. I know now. " I said to her reassuringly.

"Since you know that now you know basically everything except one thing...I got offered a job at YLWM. I don't know if I'm going to take it. I mean I'm thinking about it..but I don't know." she told me unsure of what she should do. She was being honest with me. This was my chance to tell her about Kendall..I needed to tell her. She needed to know.

"Remember last night when you asked me if that was all...about the Kendall thing?" I asked her no heart beating faster than normal.

"Yeah..." she said as she pushed herself up from my chest now staring at me.

"Well that wasn't all..." I said to her looking down at my hands feeling guiltier then ever.

"Harry..please just tell me. Just please just get it all out now. I'm begging you." She said to me as she held her eyes closed crying.

"Yesterday when we got to the studio. We kissed. She kissed me...but I'll admit it I got caught up in it before I pushed her away. I'm so sorry." I told her now tears in my eyes knowing I was about to lose the best thing that's ever happened to me.

"You kissed her..you lied to me." She said as she pulled her hands away from mine.

"I know...I wanted to tell you..." I told her knowing there was no excuse.

"Then why didn't you fucking tell me?" She said now upset and standing.

"I was scared . I CAN'T LOSE YOU." I told her now tears coming out faster standing up with her.

"Oh yeah, why is that? Because I'm good back up . Because you feel the need to save me? " She yelled now pushing me letting all her anger out. " Because I'm normal. What...what is it Harry?!" I stood there in silence thinking about my next move. " GOD DAMMIT TELL ME!" she yelled louder now pushing me again harder.

"Because I love you. I can't lose you because I'm in love with you..that's why.." I said to her causing her to step back changing her facial expression from anger to relief.

"You..love me?" she said quietly.

"Yeah...I love you..a lot. So much it scares me." I told her.



Ashlynn's POV.


"You..love me?" I asked him now quieter then before. Totally taken back by his words.

"Yeah...I love you..a lot. So much it scares me." He told me. His words caused me to fall to the floor in defeat and cry more than before.

Harry sat next to me and cried with me then I asked him a question.

"How can you love me?" I asked me needing to know.

"The same way I breathe air. The same way I get up on that stage and sing every night. Without those things I wouldn't be here. I love you like that. I've been in love with you ever since that day when we talked on my bed. That's why I was so scared to tell you about the kiss...I can't lose you. If I lose you..I lose air..I lose what music means to me. None of it matters without you." he said to me causing me to cry more. "I know it's over...I just needed you to know." Over? It's over when I say it's over..and It's not over.

"Over? Where did you get that idea?" I asked him my tears now slowing down a bit.

"I just figured..." He told me looking down at his hands. Something he does when he gets nervous.

"Look at me. Harry look at me." I demanded of him as I grabbed his hand. "Look, I wanna be with you. I'm scared I'm so so scared. But..I need you. You're that missing piece that I've been searching for. This hole I've had in my heart for so long. I thought moving to London and getting this amazing job would fill it...but it didn't. You did. I'm not going to throw that away because of some girl that threw herself at you. I trust you. I'm not happy about it. I'm hurt..really really hurt right now from everything. But you told me...and that's more then I would of ever expected from you. So thank you." I told him leaning my head on his shoulder.

"I'm going to talk to Paul on Monday and make sure this whole Kendall things ends." he told me reassuringly.

"Please do. I don't want you to be with anyone else but me. I love you Harry Styles." I told him as I cried more.

"I love you so much Ashlynn Grace." he told me as he pulled me in for a kiss.

"If i ever see that bitch I'm going to punch her. " I told him causing him to laugh.

"Baby, you do it!" he told me kissing my forehead.

He was it. He was the piece that filled the huge crater I had in my chest. I needed him. He needed me. I love him and he loves me.

Notes

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