(Harry’s POV)
Two days later and we still can’t stop saying the word boyfriend. I don’t know what it is about the phrase “You’re my boyfriend.” but it does crazy things to my heart. We’re constantly whispering it in each other’s ears. During interviews and concerts and every other time. Those have changed too. Lou and I are all over each other during performances, and the fans are going absolutely nuts. I know just what I can do to him, and vice versa. In the middle of a song I’ll casually lean in and whisper something along the lines of “Wait till we get off stage, boyfriend.” and he’ll visibly shudder. And naturally he’ll get back at me by singing so amazingly on his solos that his voice breaks delicately like he knows I love, and then he’ll send me bedroom eyes from across the stage. Damn him.
Damn the songs too. They’d always connected with me, of course, as they’re our songs. But now I can finally feel the lyrics hit home. Tonight’s concert was filled with touches and smiles and whispers, but it was those stupid lyrics that got to me. You’ve got that one thing. And Louis Tomlinson does. Turned around, and you stole my heart. And he had. Can’t be no superman, but for you I’ll be super human. It’s true. I’ll do anything for my Boo. You know I’ll be your life, your love, your reason to be. Jesus that one hits me. In reality every single one does, and I might be mistaken but I’m pretty sure Louis’ feeling the same. Every time there’s a lyric that fits us he’ll exchange a glance with me. And when we’re both singing we serenade the other, ignoring the warning look from Liam.
Liam’s actually been fairly cool with everything since he caught us. We had a small conversation that night filled with things like Yes we care about each other and Yes we know it’s a risk and We’re not idiots, we’ll be careful and finished off with confirming that We got together after the fight on the bus, we’ve had feelings for ages and those aren’t going away any time soon. Since then he hadn’t brought it up, just sent us smirks and raised eyebrows whenever we did something overly couple-y. So that was nice I suppose.
Niall and Zayn have actually started up something that Lou and I have a laugh about nearly every night. Apparently Zayn knew about Louis’ feelings towards me (that I still can’t believe are real, it’s like a dream) whereas Niall knew about mine. So now they’ve told each other and are trying to get us together. We thought about telling them but this is far more fun. They’ve been sending hints, forceful texts and even going as far as locking us together in a bathroom as a ‘prank’. Well it worked out fine for us because we made out until they opened the door, and then told them nothing had happened and they were being idiots. Don’t look at me like that, Lou and I are the pranksters here, it’s our job to fool everyone.
Anyways, we haven’t gotten much further in our relationship. That’s not to say I don’t want to, believe me when I say I’ve been dying to get into his tight pants. But there’s a more emotional level to us that works just fine and we are still on tour, meaning we need to be careful. Then again, we do have a hotel room (that I am absolutely locking to avoid a repeat of last time) tonight, so who knows. I just don’t want to take advantage of Louis. He means more to me than anything, and he’s so fragile right now. I know he’s been itching to hurt himself by the way he always has his fingers on his wrists. I hate to admit it but when he’s asleep, cuddled into my side, I examine them to make sure he hasn’t done anything stupid. I just need to know.
And now we’ve just finished one of our smaller concerts and Lou exited to the other side of the stage and I have this crazy need to just hold him. So I push past Zayn and Liam who are high fiving and gushing about the performance. I weave around everyone back stage, nearly knocking a few over but I don’t bother apologising. And then I see him with Niall and I throw caution to the wind, running over and pulling him into a surprise hug so powerful that it lifts him off his feet. I always found it funny that I’m two years younger and yet I’m taller and sometimes more mature. Sometimes.
Louis laughs and wraps his legs around my hips so I’m supporting him with my arms, and I bury my face into his chest. I lean his back against the nearest wall to be safe, and his hands connect behind my neck.
“You were amazing, Curly.” He says, fingers finding my hair and entangling themselves.
“You were better. You voice is like, freaking heaven or something.” I say lamely, not bothering to hide my blush.
Lou barks out a laugh, kissing my forehead. I lean into it, ignoring the fact that we’re in public, my eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of his soft lips on my skin.
“I love you, Lou.” I utter before I even know what I’m doing.
“Love you too, Harry.” He says cheerily. But no, he’s not understanding, I need to make him understand.
I open my eyes and move our faces close enough that our noses are touching. He raises an eyebrow and I shake my head.
“No…Louis, I love you.” The way I say it changes everything. It’s not teasing or friendly. It’s romantic and shot full of emotion.
His eyes widen, lips parting in surprise. And then he smiles, eyes crinkling and nose scrunching. Geez, could he be anymore perfect?
“I love you too, Hazza.” Lou tells me simply. The way he says it is different than anything else, and his tone sends butterflies aflutter in my stomach.
I grin back, nuzzling our noses together. Our eyes don’t leave each other, soaking in the reality of how far we’ve come, the implications of what we’ve just said, and the feeling of love that surrounds me, and I assume him as well.
“Hey lovebirds, let’s go, Niall’s desperate for pizza.” Liam calls, and the moment ends all too soon.
“Piggyback?” Lou asks with a fake pout when I put him on the ground. I can’t deny that idiot anything.
“Anything for you.” I tease, turning around. He jumps on my back, one arm wrapping around my neck and the other out in a superman motion.
“TO PIZZA AND BEYOND!” He shouts and I laugh, racing us down the hallway.
*******************************************
(Louis’ POV)
That night the five of us spend time in Liam’s hotel room, eating pizza and relaxing. Paul helped us carry everything in, and then Harry and I had locked him out when he left to go grab himself a beer from the hotel bar. I don’t think he really cared, because technically he could get another room key, but didn’t. Instead he jiggled the doorknob, we heard a half-sigh-half-chuckle, and then he’d left us to ourselves, just the way we like it. We’re responsible enough, right?
“I swear to god if you don’t give me the last piece of pizza I will shave your head in your sleep!” Niall shouts at Harry, who has him pinned to the ground, wrestling him for said slice.
I laugh and exchange and amused glance with Liam, who has yet to step in. Zayn’s sleeping on the couch (no surprise) and I have the urge to draw something on his face. But not now.
“No! I’ll never surrender! The pizza is mine, asshat!” Harry says, rolling Niall over to straddle him. I don’t like the fact that it’s not me. I try to shove away the cold feeling in my gut.
Niall flails about, trying to shimmy himself over to the coffee table where the box is. Harry figures it out and pins his arms to the ground, much like he did to me the other day. Once again, jealousy flares. It’s irrational, I know. But still.
The next few seconds are a blur of motion, cries of pain, giggles and curse words, and next thing I know Harry’s sitting on Niall, pizza slice in hand, smug grin on his face.
“Cheater!” Niall whines, slapping harry. “You’re not allowed to tickle!”
“Who says? I do as I like.” Harry laughs, biting into the pizza.
He makes no move to leave his spot on Niall’s chest and my stomach flares again, eyebrows furrowing as I bite my lip. I want Haz in my arms, not that stupid leprechaun’s. Okay, rude.
“Hey Hazza? I’d like that pizza, my dear.” I say sweetly, smirking at the hopeful twinkle in his eyes.
Instantly he’s off the other boy and rushing to sit beside me on the large recliner. His legs hook with mine and he wraps an arm around my waist. He holds out the pizza and I take a bite, winking at him.
“Whipped.” Niall mutters and sits with Liam who pats his shoulder sympathetically. I smile, satisfied with myself.
Harry cuddles closer, taking his own mouthful of pizza while I massage his scalp. I could get used to this, I really could. The way we fit together, the way his fingers play at my hip, the way his curls tickle my ear, the way my hand subconsciously moves to snake around his torso.
And then it hits me. They say it grows gradually, this feeling. They say you see it coming and you feel it getting stronger, until it dawns on you. But it doesn’t. It knocks you over sideways and makes your heart stop.
And stop, my heart does. My eyes rake over Harry, taking in everything that’s causing said feeling. His curly hair frames his rosy cheeks perfectly. His eyes are focused on the tv, but they’re sparkling nonetheless, eyelashes casting light shadows on his skin. His lips are parted, pizza hovering near them, not moving closer. I continue down, taking in the way his neck moves, freckles decorating the milky skin. His shoulders are perfectly shaped and his shirt is covering too much of him. His waist feels at home within my hold and it’s perfect.
As that feeling and realization hits me, it’s perfect. Harry is my everything. I trust him with everything and I love him with everything. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him and the amount of feeling…the amount of raw love I have for him is utterly overwhelming.
I love him more than anything.
Instead of leaning over and kissing him like I really, really want to, I nudge him slightly. His eyes meet mine, light dancing within them and I gesture to the pizza. He feeds it to me, my teeth ripping off a piece.
As we finish it off, bite by alternating bite, our eyes don’t leave each others. It’s a well known fact that Harry is terrible at hiding his emotions. He can try (and believe me, he will) but it never works for long. Though it’s clear that in this moment he doesn’t put up any thin barriers. The open, longing look in his eyes says it all.
He loves me just as much.
“Let’s get out of here.” I mutter, barely aware of the fact that good god, I just said that in the huskiest voice….
He doesn’t break his gaze, and I watch as his eyes dilate, comprehension showing on his face. His grin falters, breath hitching. I try to ignore the feeling that spreads in my chest as he takes his bottom lip in his teeth, his eyebrow rising.
“Are you…sure?” He asks. Anyone else listening in would have been confused but we know exactly what he means.
Am I sure I want to do this? Go farther with him? Let down my final wall and just let him see me as me? It scares the shit out of me, but yes I do.
I take my free hand and touch it to his, fingers threading through his own. I watch the way our palms fit together, and the way his thumb plays with mine.
I know my gesture was a silent answer, but I speak anyways. “Yes.”
*********************************************************
(Harry’s POV)
After a quick and stupidly put together excuse we said goodbye to the boys, hands still entangled, nearly stumbling down the hall in our eager haste to get to our room. I’d struggled with the task of getting the door open and Lou had sniggered, making me slap him playfully, but the mood of tension hadn’t lifted even then.
As soon as the door had shut (and locked) I’d pressed him against it, mouth smashing onto his. My tongue had entered immediately, not bothering to wait. And Lou had moaned, the most amazing fucking noise, and I’d lost it.
I’d grabbed him by the hips, lifted him up until he wrapped his legs around me, arms linking behind my neck, and I’d groaned into his mouth as the movement rubbed our crotches together.
I don’t remember much about stumbling to our room, just that our mouths hadn’t left each other once, and my fingernails had dug into his jumper as we attempted to find the door.
And that’s how I got here, falling onto the bed atop of Louis, tongue running along the roof of his mouth. He uses his legs’ grip on my waist to pull me closer, flush to him. My hands hold his back tighter and his thread through my hair.
I realize now would be a good time to use every bit of knowledge only I have about Louis. I take his bottom lip within my teeth and bite down with fair pressure, hearing him whine into my mouth. His fingers tug at my curls as payback and I bite back a moan. Two can play at that game. I let my fingers crawl under his shirt, scraping along his hips. He arks up against me and I smirk into the kiss.
Breaking away breathlessly, his eyes darken. “You suck.” He utters.
“I know.” I grin, capturing his mouth again. He chuckles against me and I take that as a good sign.
Taking a chance, I roll my hips downwards against him. Pleasure shoots through me and I feel Louis gasp into my mouth. But he doesn’t pull away. Instead, he uses his grip on my head to pull me impossibly closer.
And I can’t get enough of him. He tastes like pizza and he smells like his intoxicating vanilla tinted cologne and god he feels so good. He moves his hips against mine tentatively, and I let out a groan. Neither of us really know what we’re doing, but I don’t think we care at all.
My slightly shaking fingers reach up to his shirt and he senses what I want, pulling away from me so I can yank it over his head. He smirks and tugs at my own t-shirt, so I lift my arms up for him to pull it off. Once the cloth barrier is gone, I prop myself up above him and just stare, letting my eyes rake over his chest.
It’s not like I’ve never seen him shirtless. I’ve seen him bloody naked, but I wasn’t looking then. I’d never had him as mine, as my amazing boyfriend, laying underneath me glancing up with a blush on his cheeks as I look at him.
“You’re kind of gorgeous, you know that?” I say before I even know what I’m doing.
Louis blushes further, slapping my chest playfully. “Nothing compared to you, Mr Four Nipples.” He teases and I roll my eyes, burying my face in his chest.
“You know I hate that.” I groan out of embarrassment, but really I’m mostly just playing. I do in fact despise the birthmarks, but it’s just Lou being Lou.
His hands roam over my back, nails digging in at random intervals as he kisses my hair. “Did I say you could stop snogging me?” Louis asks, and his tone is filled with unmistakable want.
I snap my head up to raise a cheeky eyebrow. “No I do not believe you did.” I tease.
“Well then, I suggest you get to it.” Louis demands and I fight down the butterflies in my gut as I move to hover incredibly close to his mouth. I hesitate there for a moment.
“Boyfriend.” I say, my breath hitting his lips.
“Boyfriend.” He confirms, and hearing it like that, full of wonder, I lose control.
Our lips crash together again, somewhat painfully, and my grip on his hips tightens. He scratches along my back again, slowly and not enough to hurt, and god I never knew this could feel so good.
I’m not going to lie, I’ve had sex with plenty of girls. I know it sounds shallow, but when you’re a celebrity they kind of throw themselves at you, and sometimes you just give in. But nothing had ever felt this…equal. We haven’t even taken our bloody pants off and this feels better than anything I’ve ever done. This has feelings, this has meaning. This is…perfect.
I reach down for his trousers, tugging at the waist band as a warning. He nods a little into the snog and I undo the button and zipper, pushing them down to his knees. We shimmy up the bed a little to allow him to kick off his jeans, and his slim fingers undo my own, shoving them down.
I break the kiss to look into his eyes once more. A silent question is clear in my eyes, but I vocalize it anyways.
“You sure?” I ask. There’s no going back now, not that we’d want to.
“Yes.” Lou nods hastily.
I lean in to kiss him lightly a few times before pulling back again, pulling my jeans off.
“To be honest, I have no idea what I’m doing.” I admit, flushing scarlet as my hands hover on Louis’ boxers.
“Me neither, obviously. Um…how do we do this?” Lou asks awkwardly, but he still looks so lustful that it nearly kills me.
I shove our lips back together, snogging him reassuringly. His fingers tweak my hair again, pulling at sensitive curls and I quite literally whimper into his lips.
“We do this…our way.” I answer when I tug my face away from his, lips kiss swollen in the most amazing way.
“Our way.” Louis repeats between deep breaths, as if for himself. “Sounds perfect.”
I grin, pulling his face back to mine. Our lips work slower this time, moving against each others with false confidence. My fingers walk along his chest, mapping him out. I scratch along his sides, over his lean muscles, flicking his nipple which makes him keen against me and roll his hips upwards.
I try not to gasp as I take a chance and move my crotch against his, electricity shooting through me. Louis moans into my mouth and I scratch his hips further.
It takes me a second, but once I think about it, I realize that being hesitant isn’t going to help in this situation. So I shove down my nerves and let my fingers trail down Lou’s chest until I reach the band of his boxers. His hips arch upwards and I take that as a yes.
I pull them off without breaking away from his mouth and I feel his fingers pull away from my hair to travel downwards, grabbing my own boxers and shoving them down. We shimmy further up the bed in order to pull them fully off, and then I realize wow, we’re naked and making out and god this is amazing.
Experimentally, I roll my hips downwards once more and whine into the snog as the friction between our naked crotches makes me weak in the knees. Lou’s hands find my back again, digging in his nails perfectly.
I rub us together again, making Louis moan. God, I love that I can make him do that. He pushes upwards again, and we find a sort-of-rhythm that induces more moans and shaky whimpers.
Within a minute or so I’m close. This normally doesn’t happen but god, Lou feels so good, and the little shaky breaths he’s inhaling are so hot, and the way his tongue plays with mine is so perfect and-
He rolls his hips up again and I moan loudly, pride shoved out the window.
“Lou-” I stutter, voice wrecked already. “I’m cl-close.”
“Me too.” He groans, using his grip on my back to pull me down against him, friction shooting sparks through me.
I catch his mouth in mine again and buck my hips forwards. God, I’m so close, I can’t even think properly. Louis whimpers into my mouth and I know he’s there by the way his movements become slightly erratic.
I move to suck on his jaw, biting into the skin as I roll myself downwards again, panting. “Come for me, Louis.” I whisper deeply into his ear.
It’s enough to push him over the edge and he whines into my neck, coming in stripes across my torso. His fingers wrap themselves in my curls and he tugs on them hard and as I see Lou’s head tilt upwards in ecstasy I lose it. I come as well, hips bucking and moaning loudly.
I roll over to lay beside him, panting at the ceiling as I drift down from my high, blinking rapidly. When I do come to my senses Louis is staring upwards, still breathing heavily. I notice that his hand is still behind my neck, fingers rubbing the curls there.
“Well that was…” I say exhaustedly, not needing to finish. I turn my head on the pillow to study his pink cheeks.
“Yep.” Louis half-laughs rolling sideways to shoot me a lopsided grin. I lean in and kiss his lips softly.
“Messier than with a girl.” He comments when we pull away. I chuckle and cuddle close, Lou leaning his head in the crook of my neck where it belongs.
“Ah, but now we have an excuse to shower together in the morning.” I say, snaking my arms around him and pulling him closer.
“You sneaky bastard.” He teases, pulling the covers over us.
We snuggle closer, thought processes returning to normal. I can feel his breath on my chest, dancing across where my heart lies.
“I love you, Hazza.” He whispers softly, kissing my bare skin and making goose bumps appear.
“Love you too. Sweet dreams babe.”