What The Papers Don't Say
I Feel You, Brah
" You've been here before. Choose any room you like !" I unlocked the door letting all three of us in.
" Thank you, really ." Eleanor smiled making her way up the stairs
I stormed out of Lou's house not giving him a single second to explain himself.
I really couldn't care less. I mean what he did was already bad enough, and now theres a
mini version of him growing inside some hoe's stomach ? No.
" Bell, what's going through your mi-"
" Sit." I said sternly interrupting Harry's sentence as I pointed at the black pleather couch.
My gaze followed his as his body sank into the couch.
" Did you know about this all along ?" I asked crossing my arms together wearing the most
serious face ever.
" Yes, but I wa-"
" Harry ! Really !" I asked in disbelief.
" Just let me finish my sentences for once " He raised a finger at me.
" Yes I did know. But, Louis said it was a drunk mistake, his feelings never changed for El,
and he wanted to just leave it behind. " Harry continued
" Is drunk really an excuse ?" I sighed joining him on the couch.
" I'm not sure." His hands reached for mine.
" She's really hurting you know." I whispered.
" And so is he. I just hope the whole baby thing is fake." His hand gave mine an assuring squeeze.
" I hope so too." I admitted.
" Well, I'll leave you too girls for yourselves." He pulled me up with him.
" I'm gonna miss you." I pouted.
" You know I wanna stay." He smiled
" But you can't." I sloppily imitated.
" Stop being so cute." His free hands surrounded my waist releasing that familiar
rush all over my body as his rough voice vibrated in a short laugh.
" I can feel your heart breaking for me." I pouted even more.
" And for Eleanor. You should go." He reminded.
" Kiss goodnight ?" I released my pout.
" Always." He leaned in crashing his lips on mine. I wrapped my palms around his neck running
my hands through the curls at the nape of his neck as he bushed his upper lip over mine.
" Go get some sleep." He pulled away leaving me breathless.
" You too babe." I stood on my tippy toes placing a small kiss on his nose.
I watched his curls bounce off as he made his way to the door. This is going to be the first
night I'm going to sleep without his arms around me. But, he has to be there for Lou
and I have to be here for El.
" I love you !" I yelled at the latest minute as the door shut.
" .. Even more !" His voice trailed off in the background of the car's door closing.
I sighed at the fact one of the relationships I ship the most might end. I just can't see
Eleanor without Louis. Or Louis without Eleanor. It just doesn't work. Its like messing with the balance of nature
" I'm here to save the night ! " The wind blew small strands of my hair at the sudden change of the location.
" You can try" Eleanor replied not bothering to look away from the ceiling.
" And I shall succeeded. I joined her position on the bed.
" Judging what he did ? Not any time soon" She protested.
" I'm sorry, by the way." I said making her nod.
Silence. The room was filled with silence as we both stared at the ceiling with no emotions
printed on our faces at all. We weren't speaking, but silence just says it all.
We both have that big of an amount of thoughts in our heads that its too much to say out loud.
Or more like hard to say out loud.
" You know what's most tragic in all of this drama ?" She broke the silence.
" I'm listening." I played with my fingers in anticipation to what her broken heart was about to
poor out to the young night.
" The fact I thought that we were forever." She paused when her hand landed on her stomach.
" Its stupid. Forget it." She finished.
" No. Tell me." I was too interested to let go.
" It's just I thought, I thought that we would actually get married some day. That it's genuine, you know ?"
" Yeah I know how that feels. Trust me." I nodded.
" But you've only been dating Haz for half a year ?" El questioned.
" Not Harry." I sighed remembering the harsh feelings I wrapped in a box and put away.
" Josh ? You never told me the full story. Or anyone, actually."
" It's not something you bring up in a conversation really."
" But you can bring it up in this one." She turned around glancing at me for the first time.
" I guess." I agreed.
I took a deep breath as her head turned to its previous position making the bed shift a little.
" Josh and I dated for two years and a half. " I began.
" That's quiet a a lot."
" It is. It felt so real and right, at the time. I don't know what it is but the way his eyes
looked at me just made me think he actually cared. We were the kind of couple you see and ask
' oh wow they're still together ?' But eyes can deceive too. One night he bailed on a date because
he apparently had a business dinner." I added air quotes and paused taking a deep breath
once more again making the fresh tear leave a wet trail down my left cheek.
So its true. When the first tear is from the left eye, you really are hurting.
" You can stop." Eleanor gently placed her hand on top of mine.
" I already made reservations at the restaurant so I thought why not go anyways ? " I continued against her will.
" I get to the restaurant, order my food and decide to look around at the crowd. There he was,
with some blond girl holding hands with the biggest smile ever you'd think his lips would tear
apart any minute. Except my heart was torn apart." I wiped the old memories away leaving a trail only.
Just like the box I decided to un wrap for the first time, today.
It was too quiet to say anything really. We both just truly understood what each one went or
gone through that words weren't needed to seal that promise.
" I'm sorry, too."
" We're so cheesy." I laughed.
" Yes we are !" She admitted.
" Its days like these that make me want to slip back into my coma." I laughed at how pathetic
I sound right now.
" I feel you, brah." Eleanor elbowed me.
" I got yo back, hoe." I drew a heart in the air.
" My bitch." She laughed.
" We should sleep." I choked though my smile.
" That sounds so good right now." El pulled herself up fixing her hair.
" Good night." I got up marking my body on the duvet.
" Night." She repeated.
I pushed down the light switch and grabbed the door knob at the same time.
I took a step back stealing one last look at how she is holding up.
" Today was a bitch. I hope tomorrow is better." I heard her complain as the hallway light
reflected on the right half of her face making her curls glow.
" It better be." I smiled once more ready to leave.
" Thank you, really ." Eleanor smiled making her way up the stairs
I stormed out of Lou's house not giving him a single second to explain himself.
I really couldn't care less. I mean what he did was already bad enough, and now theres a
mini version of him growing inside some hoe's stomach ? No.
" Bell, what's going through your mi-"
" Sit." I said sternly interrupting Harry's sentence as I pointed at the black pleather couch.
My gaze followed his as his body sank into the couch.
" Did you know about this all along ?" I asked crossing my arms together wearing the most
serious face ever.
" Yes, but I wa-"
" Harry ! Really !" I asked in disbelief.
" Just let me finish my sentences for once " He raised a finger at me.
" Yes I did know. But, Louis said it was a drunk mistake, his feelings never changed for El,
and he wanted to just leave it behind. " Harry continued
" Is drunk really an excuse ?" I sighed joining him on the couch.
" I'm not sure." His hands reached for mine.
" She's really hurting you know." I whispered.
" And so is he. I just hope the whole baby thing is fake." His hand gave mine an assuring squeeze.
" I hope so too." I admitted.
" Well, I'll leave you too girls for yourselves." He pulled me up with him.
" I'm gonna miss you." I pouted.
" You know I wanna stay." He smiled
" But you can't." I sloppily imitated.
" Stop being so cute." His free hands surrounded my waist releasing that familiar
rush all over my body as his rough voice vibrated in a short laugh.
" I can feel your heart breaking for me." I pouted even more.
" And for Eleanor. You should go." He reminded.
" Kiss goodnight ?" I released my pout.
" Always." He leaned in crashing his lips on mine. I wrapped my palms around his neck running
my hands through the curls at the nape of his neck as he bushed his upper lip over mine.
" Go get some sleep." He pulled away leaving me breathless.
" You too babe." I stood on my tippy toes placing a small kiss on his nose.
I watched his curls bounce off as he made his way to the door. This is going to be the first
night I'm going to sleep without his arms around me. But, he has to be there for Lou
and I have to be here for El.
" I love you !" I yelled at the latest minute as the door shut.
" .. Even more !" His voice trailed off in the background of the car's door closing.
I sighed at the fact one of the relationships I ship the most might end. I just can't see
Eleanor without Louis. Or Louis without Eleanor. It just doesn't work. Its like messing with the balance of nature
" I'm here to save the night ! " The wind blew small strands of my hair at the sudden change of the location.
" You can try" Eleanor replied not bothering to look away from the ceiling.
" And I shall succeeded. I joined her position on the bed.
" Judging what he did ? Not any time soon" She protested.
" I'm sorry, by the way." I said making her nod.
Silence. The room was filled with silence as we both stared at the ceiling with no emotions
printed on our faces at all. We weren't speaking, but silence just says it all.
We both have that big of an amount of thoughts in our heads that its too much to say out loud.
Or more like hard to say out loud.
" You know what's most tragic in all of this drama ?" She broke the silence.
" I'm listening." I played with my fingers in anticipation to what her broken heart was about to
poor out to the young night.
" The fact I thought that we were forever." She paused when her hand landed on her stomach.
" Its stupid. Forget it." She finished.
" No. Tell me." I was too interested to let go.
" It's just I thought, I thought that we would actually get married some day. That it's genuine, you know ?"
" Yeah I know how that feels. Trust me." I nodded.
" But you've only been dating Haz for half a year ?" El questioned.
" Not Harry." I sighed remembering the harsh feelings I wrapped in a box and put away.
" Josh ? You never told me the full story. Or anyone, actually."
" It's not something you bring up in a conversation really."
" But you can bring it up in this one." She turned around glancing at me for the first time.
" I guess." I agreed.
I took a deep breath as her head turned to its previous position making the bed shift a little.
" Josh and I dated for two years and a half. " I began.
" That's quiet a a lot."
" It is. It felt so real and right, at the time. I don't know what it is but the way his eyes
looked at me just made me think he actually cared. We were the kind of couple you see and ask
' oh wow they're still together ?' But eyes can deceive too. One night he bailed on a date because
he apparently had a business dinner." I added air quotes and paused taking a deep breath
once more again making the fresh tear leave a wet trail down my left cheek.
So its true. When the first tear is from the left eye, you really are hurting.
" You can stop." Eleanor gently placed her hand on top of mine.
" I already made reservations at the restaurant so I thought why not go anyways ? " I continued against her will.
" I get to the restaurant, order my food and decide to look around at the crowd. There he was,
with some blond girl holding hands with the biggest smile ever you'd think his lips would tear
apart any minute. Except my heart was torn apart." I wiped the old memories away leaving a trail only.
Just like the box I decided to un wrap for the first time, today.
It was too quiet to say anything really. We both just truly understood what each one went or
gone through that words weren't needed to seal that promise.
" I'm sorry, too."
" We're so cheesy." I laughed.
" Yes we are !" She admitted.
" Its days like these that make me want to slip back into my coma." I laughed at how pathetic
I sound right now.
" I feel you, brah." Eleanor elbowed me.
" I got yo back, hoe." I drew a heart in the air.
" My bitch." She laughed.
" We should sleep." I choked though my smile.
" That sounds so good right now." El pulled herself up fixing her hair.
" Good night." I got up marking my body on the duvet.
" Night." She repeated.
I pushed down the light switch and grabbed the door knob at the same time.
I took a step back stealing one last look at how she is holding up.
" Today was a bitch. I hope tomorrow is better." I heard her complain as the hallway light
reflected on the right half of her face making her curls glow.
" It better be." I smiled once more ready to leave.
Ok, thnx so much
2/17/13