Life of a Direction-ette

"You can't be serious." Jess exclaims at me while I lay lifeless in my bed. I have the worst hangover known to man.

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Jess-ica." I say sternly while gripping the white covers. I hadn't changed out of that gaudy dress that I'm sure has been stained with a bunch of different drinks.

"You had hot drunken sex with Harry Styles?!" She questions. She sounds appalled but I know she's finds it hilarious.

"Yes." I murmur trying to get back to sleep. I have an unbelievable head ache and I don't understand why I feel so dizzy when I'm laying down. But, yeah, I had slept with Harry... again. I don't even think it was scandalous enough for people to care about.

"So, you're telling me that you gave up on Zayn?"

"What?" I ask with a wince. I don't get why everyone cares so much about my actions. Like, I'm just here. Leave me be.

"Or was that just drunken sex?"

"The latter." I say blankly. She keeps asking stupid questions when she knows I don't feel so well.

"So you still want Zayn?"

"Shut up."

"Do you?" She presses. I look up at her and she's staring right back at me.

"Maybe." I breathe. I sigh sadly as she sits beside me. She begins to weave her fingers through my hair and I guess she wants me to continue.

"I say him last night." I tell her. I close my eyes again trying to escape, but I know it won't happen.

"Why didn't you talk to him? We might me able to get you two together-"

"He was talking to some slut." I interrupt. I hear Jess laugh so I open my eyes to look at her.

"What?"

"Why is the girl he was talking to a slut?" She inquires.

"She looked like one." I whine.

"Don't go slut-shaming people just because you don't want them talking to Zayn." She disagrees. I groan and shift away from her.

"I still don't like the slut." I mumble. She just shakes her head.

"Are you gonna tell Zayn that you don't like him talking to other girls-"

"Sluts." I interrupt. She chuckles lightly.

"You like him, but you won't tell him? Why not?" She asks. I look back at my hand. The right one with the "Breathe" tattoo. I remember when I got it. Maybe it was two or one month ago. It was just me and Zayn and I liked it that way.

"Because, he doesn't care."

"Charlotte-"

"HE DOESN'T!" I yell, "He doesn't care anymore. Why would he? I would have given up on me, too."

"He won't give up on you." She says sincerely .

"And how do you know that?" I spat. And then the tears fell. It hadn't racked through me and I hadn't been sobbing, but they were there. I whipped at one tear under my left eye.

"Because I do. Everyone wants you two to be together. Even Harry."

"He does not."

"And yet, he does. He'd much rather you and Zayn be happy." She says. Why is she being so nice right now? She should be telling me how stupid I'm being. Oh, yeah. That's right. We're best friends and best friends don't do that to one another.

"But what do I do?" I sobbed and then the tears fell harder. I buried my face in the pillow to muffle the sounds.

She doesn't respond. She just ran circles along my back under my shoulder blades. I fell asleep after a while with my pillow tear-soaked.

~

JESSICA'S POV

If Char cries one more time over this asshole, I swear to god. Why can't they just see how stupid they're being.

"What is it?!" I hear a male voice yell through the door. I sigh as I say,

"Open up! It's Jess."

I'm welcomed to Zayn. Well not welcomed per se, but close enough.

"What?"

"There is a crying girl at my apartment." I tell him sternly. He just stares at me before he says,

"So."

"So? She crying over you, Zayn." I tell him. I'm trying my hardest not to yell or raise my voice but hell, he's pushing my buttons.

"That's not my problem."

"Zayn, I get it. You're mad, because Charlie chose Harry. Do even know why she chose him? Do you?" I ask. He shakes his head, letting me continue.

"She thinks you stopped caring. She honestly thinks she doesn't matter to you anymore."

"I never said that-"

"Damn right you never said that. You never told her how you feel so she's just guessing. And seriously I never seen her so upset other then when Ms. Jackson died. I don't like seeing my best friend crying... And I know you don't either." I say, out of breath. And he's just looking at me.

"Tell her that you care, before she gives up on you, like she thinks you've given up on her." I tell him finally. I walk away, not wanting to here what he was going to say.

~

CHARLOTTE'S POV

I remember when I first met Zayn. When I first joined One Direction. I was out of my mind excited And then there was Zayn. The quiet one that only said hi to me once. Of course not without telling me that he liked my name. I remember how it sounded when ever he said it.

"Charlotte."

"Charlie."

He is just something that I can't explain. He's funny and smart. Extremely good looking. Sweet and sometimes, adorable. I can't pin point one thing I like about him the most. Maybe it's just his eyes or his accent. Maybe, it's the way he laughs or the way he lights up at the weirdest things. I think, I just like him. All of him. And I blew it...