Still The One
Chapter 47
~ Capri's POV ~
"Nothing." Jade snapped. Me and Liam looked at each other before I sat back down on the couch with my beer in hand.
"It's not "Nothing". You attempted suicide!" Zayn exclaimed. I choked on air and began to cough.
"No I didn't! I think I would remember it!" I yelled while setting my beer on the side table and standing back up to look at the rest of them.
"Can I see your wrists?" Louis asked. I shrugged and pointed my wrists out to him. I looked at them myself, not exactly sure on what they were looking for. Then I saw it. It must have been really deep, because the scar is still trying to heal.
"When?" He whispered. I looked up to the rest of them who were almost in tears.
"I-I don't know. I don't remember trying to kill myself..." I thought really hard on how, when, and why I did this.
"Jade you have so much explaining to do." Louis said. I was still lost, and kind of hurt that I was the only one that didn't know I tried to take my life.
"I'm so fucking confused right now." I muttered. Louis took my hand in his and I smiled lightly at him.
"Okay... Like three months ago me and you were supposed to go to lunch together. I found you passed out on the bathroom floor, with a really deep cut. I took you to the hospital, and the doctor noticed that the babies weren't growing like they should. I told everyone that it was because you were stressed and depressed, but didn't tell a soul that you attempted suicide." Jade explained. I looked at her with my face completely white, and blank.
"Why would I do that? I would never try to take my life if I had two other ones living inside of me..." I sat back down on the couch in deep thought.
"Capri, I'm so sorry-" I cut Harry off mid-sentence.
"What's done is done." I whispered still putting all the pieces together.
I looked over to Perrie, and Danielle, they had tears streaming down their faces and Liam, And Zayn were trying to calm them down.
"Thank you so much Jade." I let go of Louis' hand and gave her a hug.
"I thought you would be mad at me." She whispered.
"No... Look at them, if they found out while I was pregnant they would have put me in a room with padded walls, and they would never have let me be alone for three minutes." I said. Zayn chuckled and walked over to me.
"That's probably true." He brought me into his arms and I wrapped my arms around his middle.
"Don't ever hurt yourself again. I know you've stopped but if one more thing hurts you I swear I'm gonna kill somebody." He said, I felt him clench his fist and I stepped out of the hug.
I placed my hands over his fist and his eyes softened.
"Calm down... My dad's in jail, and Kate is hopefully out of all of our lives." I said with a genuine smile.
"I'm not worried about other people. I'm worried about you hurting yourself." He lifted my wrist and looked at the scar.
"Speaking of hurting others..." I looked to Harry. " When will we start the switchy thingy with Darcy?" I asked hopeful.
"I don't know. Soon. While we're on tour." He said.
"Capri's going on tour with us." Liam said. I looked at Liam and shrugged.
"Oh, great. Well then we'll just wait until then. Darcy can come then." Harry looked at me with soft, pleading eyes.
"Don't look at me like that. Don't make me feel like that." I said to him. He looked to the ground and slowly stepped toward me.
"I don't know what your talking about." he looked to me and was only inches apart from me. "Feel like what?" He whispered. This is really weird.
"Like this is my fault." I responded.
"It's not your fault. It's mine. This is all my fault. It's my fault your depressed. It's my fault you lost the babies. It's my fault that your dad raped you. It's my fault that you started cutting again. It's my fault that you can never trust me again." he grabbed my shoulders, and gripped them tightly."But, one thing that isn't my fault... I'm madly in love with you. And I can't help it! Your amazing, and I can't have you. Because of my own actions. Wait, so that's my fault too. Loving you is all my fault too. Bravo! Congratulations! Nothing is your fault Capri!"
He aggressively released me from his hold, and clapped sarcastically.
"You want to know what I don't get?" He asked while walking around Louis' living room.
"I don't get how Louis get's to have you. After I have been with you for three years!" I walked over to him and placed my hand on his back. He was acting really scary right now.
"What?!" He snapped. I looked into his green eyes and he cupped my face with his hands.
"Why can't you love me like I love you?" He asked. His breath fanned my face and I closed my eyes.
"You've hurt me too many times." I whispered so only he could hear me. He didn't say another word before he walked out of Louis' flat and drove off.
I lay in his arms and draw random patterns on his chest. He plays with strands of my hair and hums lightly to a melody.
"Louis?" I whisper.
"Yes, Love?" He asks sweetly.
"Do you love me?" I ask.
"That's hard to answer. Because I have always loved you, but in a friend way. Now that we are...whatever we are, falling in love with you is so much easier." I smiled and took his hand in mine. I played with his fingers and traced over his fingernails.
"Do you love me?" he asked curious.
"Like you said; I loved you as my best friend, and now that we're involved loving you is easier." He kissed the top of my head and I smiled even wider.
"Okay, now that we have said that, what are we exactly?" I looked up into his eyes and smiled.
"What do you want us to be?"
"I want you." He said.
"So... does that mean girlfriend?" I rose my eyebrows and he chuckled.
"Does it?" He mocked.
"Yes!" I yelled and kissed his lips. He cupped my face with hands and I placed my hands at the back of his neck. The kiss became heated really quickly, and he pushed himself up on top of me. He settled in between my legs, and began to kiss down my jawline, and neck. He sunk his teeth into the sweet spot, where my neck and jaw connect. He nibbled and sucked, until the skin was sensitive. I moaned slightly at his gesture and he smiled against my skin.
His shirt discarded to the floor, and I pushed his shoulders back and flipped us over so I was straddling him. He chuckled and I pulled away to look at him.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing." He said while avoiding eye contact.
"Ohhh. I see, you haven't had a girl in control before?" I rose my eyebrows at him and he shrugged.
"Okay, Tomlinson. I'm gonna show you what girls do when their in control." I whispered in his ear. He gulped and nodded his head skeptically.
I crashed my lips onto his again, and smirked knowing what I was about to do to this boy. I circulated my hips against his crotch and grinded on him hard.
He groaned against my mouth and I deviously giggled. His hands roamed over my body and I separated from his lips. I kissed down to his ear and his mouth breathed out heavily.
"Did you know... that I have always wanted to be this close to you?" He said against my ear.
"No...But now I do." I kissed down from his ear and down his bare chest. I stopped at the elastic of his sweats. I wrapped my finger around it but he stopped me.
"I'm not wearing boxers. There is absolutely nothing beyond those sweats." I chuckled before pulling his sweats down to his ankles. His erection sprung free and I kissed his tip lightly before crawling back up to Louis' face, pecking his cheek and crawling under the blankets.
"Oh my... Capri that was so mean!" I giggled to myself realizing I left Louis complete naked, and with a boner.
"Sorry. I'm too tired to go on." He huffed angrily before wrapping his arms around me.
"Goodnight" He muttered.
"Goodnight Lou Boo."
"Nothing." Jade snapped. Me and Liam looked at each other before I sat back down on the couch with my beer in hand.
"It's not "Nothing". You attempted suicide!" Zayn exclaimed. I choked on air and began to cough.
"No I didn't! I think I would remember it!" I yelled while setting my beer on the side table and standing back up to look at the rest of them.
"Can I see your wrists?" Louis asked. I shrugged and pointed my wrists out to him. I looked at them myself, not exactly sure on what they were looking for. Then I saw it. It must have been really deep, because the scar is still trying to heal.
"When?" He whispered. I looked up to the rest of them who were almost in tears.
"I-I don't know. I don't remember trying to kill myself..." I thought really hard on how, when, and why I did this.
"Jade you have so much explaining to do." Louis said. I was still lost, and kind of hurt that I was the only one that didn't know I tried to take my life.
"I'm so fucking confused right now." I muttered. Louis took my hand in his and I smiled lightly at him.
"Okay... Like three months ago me and you were supposed to go to lunch together. I found you passed out on the bathroom floor, with a really deep cut. I took you to the hospital, and the doctor noticed that the babies weren't growing like they should. I told everyone that it was because you were stressed and depressed, but didn't tell a soul that you attempted suicide." Jade explained. I looked at her with my face completely white, and blank.
"Why would I do that? I would never try to take my life if I had two other ones living inside of me..." I sat back down on the couch in deep thought.
"Capri, I'm so sorry-" I cut Harry off mid-sentence.
"What's done is done." I whispered still putting all the pieces together.
I looked over to Perrie, and Danielle, they had tears streaming down their faces and Liam, And Zayn were trying to calm them down.
"Thank you so much Jade." I let go of Louis' hand and gave her a hug.
"I thought you would be mad at me." She whispered.
"No... Look at them, if they found out while I was pregnant they would have put me in a room with padded walls, and they would never have let me be alone for three minutes." I said. Zayn chuckled and walked over to me.
"That's probably true." He brought me into his arms and I wrapped my arms around his middle.
"Don't ever hurt yourself again. I know you've stopped but if one more thing hurts you I swear I'm gonna kill somebody." He said, I felt him clench his fist and I stepped out of the hug.
I placed my hands over his fist and his eyes softened.
"Calm down... My dad's in jail, and Kate is hopefully out of all of our lives." I said with a genuine smile.
"I'm not worried about other people. I'm worried about you hurting yourself." He lifted my wrist and looked at the scar.
"Speaking of hurting others..." I looked to Harry. " When will we start the switchy thingy with Darcy?" I asked hopeful.
"I don't know. Soon. While we're on tour." He said.
"Capri's going on tour with us." Liam said. I looked at Liam and shrugged.
"Oh, great. Well then we'll just wait until then. Darcy can come then." Harry looked at me with soft, pleading eyes.
"Don't look at me like that. Don't make me feel like that." I said to him. He looked to the ground and slowly stepped toward me.
"I don't know what your talking about." he looked to me and was only inches apart from me. "Feel like what?" He whispered. This is really weird.
"Like this is my fault." I responded.
"It's not your fault. It's mine. This is all my fault. It's my fault your depressed. It's my fault you lost the babies. It's my fault that your dad raped you. It's my fault that you started cutting again. It's my fault that you can never trust me again." he grabbed my shoulders, and gripped them tightly."But, one thing that isn't my fault... I'm madly in love with you. And I can't help it! Your amazing, and I can't have you. Because of my own actions. Wait, so that's my fault too. Loving you is all my fault too. Bravo! Congratulations! Nothing is your fault Capri!"
He aggressively released me from his hold, and clapped sarcastically.
"You want to know what I don't get?" He asked while walking around Louis' living room.
"I don't get how Louis get's to have you. After I have been with you for three years!" I walked over to him and placed my hand on his back. He was acting really scary right now.
"What?!" He snapped. I looked into his green eyes and he cupped my face with his hands.
"Why can't you love me like I love you?" He asked. His breath fanned my face and I closed my eyes.
"You've hurt me too many times." I whispered so only he could hear me. He didn't say another word before he walked out of Louis' flat and drove off.
I lay in his arms and draw random patterns on his chest. He plays with strands of my hair and hums lightly to a melody.
"Louis?" I whisper.
"Yes, Love?" He asks sweetly.
"Do you love me?" I ask.
"That's hard to answer. Because I have always loved you, but in a friend way. Now that we are...whatever we are, falling in love with you is so much easier." I smiled and took his hand in mine. I played with his fingers and traced over his fingernails.
"Do you love me?" he asked curious.
"Like you said; I loved you as my best friend, and now that we're involved loving you is easier." He kissed the top of my head and I smiled even wider.
"Okay, now that we have said that, what are we exactly?" I looked up into his eyes and smiled.
"What do you want us to be?"
"I want you." He said.
"So... does that mean girlfriend?" I rose my eyebrows and he chuckled.
"Does it?" He mocked.
"Yes!" I yelled and kissed his lips. He cupped my face with hands and I placed my hands at the back of his neck. The kiss became heated really quickly, and he pushed himself up on top of me. He settled in between my legs, and began to kiss down my jawline, and neck. He sunk his teeth into the sweet spot, where my neck and jaw connect. He nibbled and sucked, until the skin was sensitive. I moaned slightly at his gesture and he smiled against my skin.
His shirt discarded to the floor, and I pushed his shoulders back and flipped us over so I was straddling him. He chuckled and I pulled away to look at him.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing." He said while avoiding eye contact.
"Ohhh. I see, you haven't had a girl in control before?" I rose my eyebrows at him and he shrugged.
"Okay, Tomlinson. I'm gonna show you what girls do when their in control." I whispered in his ear. He gulped and nodded his head skeptically.
I crashed my lips onto his again, and smirked knowing what I was about to do to this boy. I circulated my hips against his crotch and grinded on him hard.
He groaned against my mouth and I deviously giggled. His hands roamed over my body and I separated from his lips. I kissed down to his ear and his mouth breathed out heavily.
"Did you know... that I have always wanted to be this close to you?" He said against my ear.
"No...But now I do." I kissed down from his ear and down his bare chest. I stopped at the elastic of his sweats. I wrapped my finger around it but he stopped me.
"I'm not wearing boxers. There is absolutely nothing beyond those sweats." I chuckled before pulling his sweats down to his ankles. His erection sprung free and I kissed his tip lightly before crawling back up to Louis' face, pecking his cheek and crawling under the blankets.
"Oh my... Capri that was so mean!" I giggled to myself realizing I left Louis complete naked, and with a boner.
"Sorry. I'm too tired to go on." He huffed angrily before wrapping his arms around me.
"Goodnight" He muttered.
"Goodnight Lou Boo."
Notes
YOU GUYS GOT A REALLY LONG CHAPTER!! Your welcome:)COMMENT
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MIDNIGHT MEMORIES IS GIVING ME HEART ATTACKS.
omg louis so sweet
4/17/14