Fake, Stupid Love
The Second
Habitually, I locked both the doorknob and the deadbolt the second I secured myself into my apartment. I kicked off my shoes and let my backpack slide down to the ground as I stepped inside.
"Hi Mom, Hi Dad. Oh, hi to you too, Dee." I called out, not receiving nor expecting a response. I poured myself a glass of milk and grabbed a banana before I threw myself onto the couch, turning on my small television.
the news was on, and that's all I really watched anyway, so I let it serve as a white noise before I started on my homework. I was about three questions into my chemistry homework when my mind started to wander...
I reached in my pocket for my phone and eagerly checked the notification I had. Did he text me already...? But I felt myself sighing in discontentment as I realized it was only a missed call from my grandmother.
You see, I didn't grow up with the normal parents and siblings combo, I grew up with my grandparents. When I turned 18, we all agreed that I was mature enough to move out if I wished, and I thought it would be a good idea to see how I adapted to this much independence. My grandparents took into consideration the fact that the job I had paid for my phone bill completely, with about $20 left over from that. They made a deal with me; if I kept my grades up, stayed true to my job, and called them daily to remind them I hadn't forgotten about them, they would pay the leftover of my bills. Because of how this worked out, all of my meals were things that didn't require a microwave or oven. I switched off my old phone company and downgraded to a pay-as-you-go phone, to keep minutes short and sweet. I tried to keep my TV watching to a minimum, and the heat/air was never adjusted if it wasn't absolutely necessary. I worked two jobs on a tough schedule, but I managed. You probably look at that idea like it's difficult to live by, but I was grateful for the help of my family.
I called my grandma back to let her know how my day went, and even talked about Louis a little. I heard her hinting over the phone as if I had a new boyfriend automatically, but I assured her I wanted nothing to do with him. I felt as though I lied to her, though, when I hung up and found myself staring at the phone screen for several minutes, awaiting a text message of any kind. I gave up, but kept my phone close by as I pushed myself to finish my homework before letting my distractions get the best of me.
The rest of that night teased me, and I felt a pang of disappointment when I pulled the quilt over my body, still lacking a text message as I drifted off in my bed.
~~
The rest of the week had me feeling negative, for whatever unknown reason, and I wasn't even the least bit excited when the last bell rang- announcing the weekend's arrival. I trudged down to my locker, filling up my backpack before leaving. I decided to take the long way out, just to see how Louis was holding up. I promised myself I wouldn't talk to him, or even look at him. Just glance in his general direction to see what was happening.
I looked over quickly as I passed his locker, seeing him talking and laughing with some other lads. One looked vaguely familiar, while the other nearly made me freeze in my tracks.
The boy that every girl has in her life... the one that "doesn't know she exists" and the one she dreams of. That was him, or at least for me it was. For as long as I could remember, I felt that familiar nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach whenever the boy with jet black hair passed by. He was practically flawless, managing to pull off top-of-the-class grades, great plays in any sport he tried out for, landing main roles in plays and getting anyone and everyone to drool over him. He was a quiet guy, but somehow was successful at being popular and the #1 guy of the school.
I guess what I admired about him was that he was humble about it, or at least he didn't show his pride. I could count many times when I watched girls, literally falling out of their tops, swoon over him and flirt with him constantly. He treated them like any good gentlemen would and politely rejected them if any of them asked him to go out. He treated everyone equal, which isn't necessarily a good thing, considering he got quite a laugh out of a good prank, but he never seemed to single me out, which can be good and bad. I could go on and on about how brilliant he really is, but I was snapped out of my thoughts by the one and only.
"Hey Em! What's up?" Louis shouted over the crowd of bustling students, ready to leave.
"Um, nothing really. How about you?" I asked, walking closer to him and his group. I felt nervous, and feared I would stutter in front of the guy of my dreams.
"I was just talking to these lads. You know Zayn and Harry?"
"Not personally." I replied, avoiding the other two.
"Well don't be shy. Zayn, Harry, this is Em. She helped me around the first day. Em, this is Zayn and Harry. They're just cheeky chaps." he grinned a toothy smile, and the other guys waved half-heartedly.
"Hi." I said just loud enough for them to hear.
"Hey, aren't you the girl that spilled applesauce all over me in grade 1?" the one named Harry asked, raising an eyebrow. I felt my face flush at this memory, immediately remembering who he was.
"Erm, that sounds like something I would do. Sorry about that." I apologized, instinctively looking down at my shoes.
"Me and the boys are gonna go somewhere, not sure yet, as soon as we get ready to go. Wanna join?" Louis invited. As much as my heart wanted to say yes, I knew I couldn't go. It was obvious I would just make everything awkward.
"No, I actually have to get to work. Thanks, though." I tried to smile, and stole a glance at Zayn. He seemed to be off in another world.
"That's too bad. I'll see you Monday, then. Have a good weekend!" Louis waved as I started to walk on, and I saw Harry flash a smile before I turned around. I was unhappy to see Zayn's head still stuck in the clouds, but I guess there's nothing I could do about that.
I wasted no time getting to my car and going straight to work, at a diner a couple blocks away. My shift started in 15 minutes, and it was gonna be a tight squeeze to get there in time. Thankfully I made it, but when I clocked in, I knew it was just another late-night shift that would drag on and on.
"Hi Mom, Hi Dad. Oh, hi to you too, Dee." I called out, not receiving nor expecting a response. I poured myself a glass of milk and grabbed a banana before I threw myself onto the couch, turning on my small television.
the news was on, and that's all I really watched anyway, so I let it serve as a white noise before I started on my homework. I was about three questions into my chemistry homework when my mind started to wander...
I reached in my pocket for my phone and eagerly checked the notification I had. Did he text me already...? But I felt myself sighing in discontentment as I realized it was only a missed call from my grandmother.
You see, I didn't grow up with the normal parents and siblings combo, I grew up with my grandparents. When I turned 18, we all agreed that I was mature enough to move out if I wished, and I thought it would be a good idea to see how I adapted to this much independence. My grandparents took into consideration the fact that the job I had paid for my phone bill completely, with about $20 left over from that. They made a deal with me; if I kept my grades up, stayed true to my job, and called them daily to remind them I hadn't forgotten about them, they would pay the leftover of my bills. Because of how this worked out, all of my meals were things that didn't require a microwave or oven. I switched off my old phone company and downgraded to a pay-as-you-go phone, to keep minutes short and sweet. I tried to keep my TV watching to a minimum, and the heat/air was never adjusted if it wasn't absolutely necessary. I worked two jobs on a tough schedule, but I managed. You probably look at that idea like it's difficult to live by, but I was grateful for the help of my family.
I called my grandma back to let her know how my day went, and even talked about Louis a little. I heard her hinting over the phone as if I had a new boyfriend automatically, but I assured her I wanted nothing to do with him. I felt as though I lied to her, though, when I hung up and found myself staring at the phone screen for several minutes, awaiting a text message of any kind. I gave up, but kept my phone close by as I pushed myself to finish my homework before letting my distractions get the best of me.
The rest of that night teased me, and I felt a pang of disappointment when I pulled the quilt over my body, still lacking a text message as I drifted off in my bed.
~~
The rest of the week had me feeling negative, for whatever unknown reason, and I wasn't even the least bit excited when the last bell rang- announcing the weekend's arrival. I trudged down to my locker, filling up my backpack before leaving. I decided to take the long way out, just to see how Louis was holding up. I promised myself I wouldn't talk to him, or even look at him. Just glance in his general direction to see what was happening.
I looked over quickly as I passed his locker, seeing him talking and laughing with some other lads. One looked vaguely familiar, while the other nearly made me freeze in my tracks.
The boy that every girl has in her life... the one that "doesn't know she exists" and the one she dreams of. That was him, or at least for me it was. For as long as I could remember, I felt that familiar nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach whenever the boy with jet black hair passed by. He was practically flawless, managing to pull off top-of-the-class grades, great plays in any sport he tried out for, landing main roles in plays and getting anyone and everyone to drool over him. He was a quiet guy, but somehow was successful at being popular and the #1 guy of the school.
I guess what I admired about him was that he was humble about it, or at least he didn't show his pride. I could count many times when I watched girls, literally falling out of their tops, swoon over him and flirt with him constantly. He treated them like any good gentlemen would and politely rejected them if any of them asked him to go out. He treated everyone equal, which isn't necessarily a good thing, considering he got quite a laugh out of a good prank, but he never seemed to single me out, which can be good and bad. I could go on and on about how brilliant he really is, but I was snapped out of my thoughts by the one and only.
"Hey Em! What's up?" Louis shouted over the crowd of bustling students, ready to leave.
"Um, nothing really. How about you?" I asked, walking closer to him and his group. I felt nervous, and feared I would stutter in front of the guy of my dreams.
"I was just talking to these lads. You know Zayn and Harry?"
"Not personally." I replied, avoiding the other two.
"Well don't be shy. Zayn, Harry, this is Em. She helped me around the first day. Em, this is Zayn and Harry. They're just cheeky chaps." he grinned a toothy smile, and the other guys waved half-heartedly.
"Hi." I said just loud enough for them to hear.
"Hey, aren't you the girl that spilled applesauce all over me in grade 1?" the one named Harry asked, raising an eyebrow. I felt my face flush at this memory, immediately remembering who he was.
"Erm, that sounds like something I would do. Sorry about that." I apologized, instinctively looking down at my shoes.
"Me and the boys are gonna go somewhere, not sure yet, as soon as we get ready to go. Wanna join?" Louis invited. As much as my heart wanted to say yes, I knew I couldn't go. It was obvious I would just make everything awkward.
"No, I actually have to get to work. Thanks, though." I tried to smile, and stole a glance at Zayn. He seemed to be off in another world.
"That's too bad. I'll see you Monday, then. Have a good weekend!" Louis waved as I started to walk on, and I saw Harry flash a smile before I turned around. I was unhappy to see Zayn's head still stuck in the clouds, but I guess there's nothing I could do about that.
I wasted no time getting to my car and going straight to work, at a diner a couple blocks away. My shift started in 15 minutes, and it was gonna be a tight squeeze to get there in time. Thankfully I made it, but when I clocked in, I knew it was just another late-night shift that would drag on and on.
7/1/13