*Gemma’s POV*
I hate hospitals and I’ve been in them too many times before as a child. The outcome of life or death is too unpredictable. When my dad went through chemotherapy, me, my mum, and Harry would always come and visit. I used to ask the nurse if she could promise me that my dad would be okay. She would get down to my eye level and tell me, “I can’t make any promises, but he looks to be progressing.” At least then I would get even a bullshit answer. We’ve been sitting in this waiting room for hours and we’ve heard nothing.

As we all sit in unsettled silence, all I can think about is the days leading up to now. I should have known better.

---

*Flashback: Two days ago*
The front door slammed and I didn’t even have to go check to see who the culprit behind the noise was. I knew it was Harry. My mum always tells him off for slamming the door when he’s upset. I placed one more piece of clothing into the moving box and before I could get out of my room to see what was wrong, Harry was up the stairs and slamming the door to his room.

“Harry?” No answer. I left out of my room and went down the hall to knock on his door.

“Harry you alright?”

“Fuck off Gemma!” I’ll take that as a no.

“Harry open the door and talk to me, I won’t tell mum. What’s going on?” There’s a pause, but I knew he would open up. Harry always open’s up to me when he won’t for anyone else.
He came out of the room and closed his door behind him before he made his way past me down the stairs not speaking. His eyes were red and puffy. Has he been crying?

“Harry, where are you going? Come here and talk to me.”

“I’m fine Gemma I promise, just leave me alone please!” His voice cracked when he spoke and it was unusual for me to see because Harry never cries. Like ever. He used to cry so much when we first got admitted to Maudsley and after a while he just forced himself to cage any emotion that would make him feel what he would label as weak.

Harry grabbed his keys off of the counter to leave out again. There is obviously something wrong, but maybe the best route to go is to give him space. I don’t want to over crowd him like I know I have in the past. It appears to only push him away. He’ll tell me eventually, he always does.

“Where are you going at least?”

“Zayn and Louis’s.” He slams the door again and I have to hold the railing of the stairs to make myself not follow him to tell me what’s wrong.
*End Flashback*

---

My mum hurriedly makes her way over to my side from trying to get information on Harry at the help desk. Her face is red and she looks so tired. She’s gone through so much with Harry over the past few years and she’s been strong through it all for too long. She lets go of Robins hand and wraps her arms around me beginning to sob. The small amount of composure I had collected for myself is broken when she starts crying.

“They won’t tell me anything Gemma! My baby, my boy, they won’t tell me if he’s okay! He’s been here for almost two hours! They know something and they won’t tell me.” Robin comes up and rubs the both of our backs trying to offer whatever comfort he can. His glasses are fogged and I know he’s cried too.

“He’s a strong lad Annie, he’ll be alright.” My mum lets me go and goes into Robin’s arms and when I look around the waiting area no one is dry eyed. Louis, Niall, Liam, Zayn and all of their girlfriends are here, all of them are here for him but Reagan. I sit back in my seat and wait for a doctor to come out with something, anything in regards to my little brother and the way he behaved yesterday makes today’s actions clearer.

---

*Flashback: Yesterday*
When Harry got back home last night, he reeked of weed and alcohol. I know he smokes sometimes, but he usually has the decency to wait until his high and the smell has gone down to a less noticeable level before he comes home. His eyes are still red this morning, but it’s not red from a high. He’s been crying again.

“Harry you sure you’re alright?” It was an asshole move, but I figured if I ask him in front of mum that he’ll break down and tell us what’s going on. He glared at me and if looks could do any physical damage, I’m sure I would be on the ground right now.

“Something bothering you love? You want to talk about it?” My mum chimed in and harry continued to play with his breakfast not looking at either of us. Before he answered, he sighed deeply before running his hand exasperatedly through his hair.

“I’m fucking fine! I’ll be fine eventually. I don’t need to talk about shit. I just want you both to leave me the fuck alone. Thanks.” He spoke quickly and his tone was harsh. He hasn’t been this temperamental since before he was diagnosed to be bipolar. My mum and I both shared a glance almost speaking without saying a word, telling each other that something was wrong. She tries to talk to Harry, but before she could get a real word in he got up and grabbed his keys off the counter before leaving out to ‘run some errands’.

When he gets back, he walks past me in the kitchen and the weed smell is stronger than it was yesterday.

“Harold! Seriously?! You reek of it, and you know how mum feels about that! What do you reckon she’ll say when she comes in the house and it smells like a weed farm.” Harry rolls his eyes at me and then hugs me before he speaks.

“Will you be here in the morning?” I try to push him off me but, he tightens his grip. I hug him back, not expecting this type of behavior seeing as how he hasn’t spoken an unforced word to me or mum in two days.

“No I’ve got to move the rest of my things into my place. Do you want to help me finish packing?”

“No, I have something to do...I love you Gemma.” Harry kissed the top of my head and hugged me a few more seconds before he went into his room and closed the door.
*End Flashback*

---

Every time a person in a lab coat or scrubs walks past us everyone holds their breath, hoping and praying that it will be someone with information on Harry and every time we’re let down. An eerie sense of calm washed over me as I sit and observe the actions of those around me.

Harry’s friends are all silent. They fidget and look around at each other with puffy red eyes and an uncertainty on their face that begins to chisel away at me when I notice the same damn facial expression is shared between all four of them. The girls are emotional wrecks, but they are all trying to reassure the boys that Harry will be fine. Laurie stands every once in a while and makes a phone call and I now know who that phone call is going out to. If Reagan loves my brother as much as she claimed to, why isn’t she here? Why does she get phone updates?

I turn my head away from the group when I see my mother abruptly rise from her seat and walk with purpose towards the service desk. Robin quickly follows behind her. I can only hear part of what she is saying, and even though I want to walk over there badly to get a better understanding, something is telling me to stay here.

---

*Flashback to this morning*
When Tamsin and I pulled back up to my mum’s house, Louis, Liam, Niall and Laurie were standing at the door.

“Did he not answer?” I asked knowing Harry all too well.

“No and we rang three times.” Liam responded and I looked at my watch as I got out of the car and said bye to my friend.

“The slow coach is probably still sleeping. He’s been so mopey these last couple of days. Come on I’ll let you in.” They all seemed to glance at one another as if they all knew something I didn’t. I ignored them and after I unlocked the door I called for him. I didn’t get a reply, not even a ‘fuck off Gems I’m sleeping.’

The boys climbed the stairs as I went to pour Laurie a glass of water.

“Harry?!” Louis called and still no reply.

“Are you sure he’s here?” I looked up at them beginning to get concerned as they called him and received no reply.

“He should be his car is out front. Harry? Harry this isn’t funny open the door!... Harry?” I knocked then pounded on the door and still nothing. Liam called his mobile and when we heard it ring on the other side of the door, we all began to panic.

Niall pushed the door in and he looked like he was sleeping but when I got closer to his bed the glass of water I was holding shattered when it hit the ground. His chest wasn’t rising and falling and his lips were the slightest shade of blue.

“Harry! No NO nonono! Harry wake up and look at me!” Louis, Liam and Niall ran in behind me and Laurie stayed frozen at his door.

“HARRY! Shit! Someone call for an ambulance! Harry come on man wake up!” I got off Harry’s bed and did as Louis instructed and when I looked through watery eyes at the bedside table at all of the open medicine bottles, I thought I would be sick.
*End Flashback*

---

I was brought out of my tormented thoughts when a doctor came up, but this time instead of him walking past us he stopped.

“Are you all the family and friends of Harry Styles?” My mum stopped her rampage on the service desk clerk and ran up to my side.

“Yes! Yes we are”

“We’ve gotten him breathing and somewhat stable, but I’m afraid that we can’t let you all back to see him. Closest of kin only.” My mum grabbed my hand as we followed the doctor back down the hall. I knew deep down that Harry would be okay. He’s a fighter and for him, death is too easy.

Notes

Hiiii Guys!! Thank you all for the lovely comments and subscribing and voting!! Sorry for the late update, but I had to edit, I'm sure there's still typos aha. The suspense is up lol! What did you think? Did the title throw you off? Be sure to leave me comments and vote vote vote (I need them lbs comments and votes are so inspirng!) if you want the story to keep on going! LOVE YOU ALL FOR READING Xx!!! :D