Twelve **********************Liliana's Pov************************************* I continue to run till I reach the door of our hotel room. I grab my keys and quickly unlock my dorr a ran in to my room, not seeing the boys or the girls. I slam my bedroom door and cry my heart out. What happens if I get publish and all the One Direction fans send me hate? Or death threats? I sob into my pillow and cried my poor heart. I felt a din in my head went off. I slowly got up from my bed and walk to the bathroom, locking it behind me and grab my shaving razors. I growled and break the plastic till I got what I'm looking for. I smile and sliced it down my wrist. "I'm not worthy." I whisper. "I'm uselss." I said doing another cut. "I should be dead" And did another. "Zayn hates me" I cried as I cut once more. "I'm not pretty." I cry hard and thuds bounding the bed room door. I lock the bedroom door before I walk into the bathroom. "Liliana. Open up love." Harry shouts. I ingore him and continue to cut my wrists. When the cuts are pouring out blood, I felt a bit faituge, but I'm not going to let it show. I clean my wounds and hid the razor in my suitcase with my 'personal' stuff. I grab a long sleeve college jump, to hide the cuts and unlock the bedroom door to all the boys with worried eyes. "Babe, are you okay?" Liam asks as he pulls me into a hug. I hug back. "I'm fine." I lied. "Liliana Rose Robins. You're lying. Tell us the truth." Louis demands. I felt more tears forming in my eyes and I turn to each of the boys and ran out of the room, crying my heart. I ran out of the hotel, with footsteps behind me. I can't do it. I don't want to do my career anymore. I'm a failure. A mistake that should've never had. I cried harder as I reached the beach. I look at the sun, setting over the ocean. I love it in LA, but I miss england. I felt my phone viberate in my pocket, so I took it out to see the Niall's calling me. I sighed and press the red button, feeling bad for not answering his call. I stare at mine wallpaper o me and Zayn. More tears ran down my face and the sun gone. I sat on the borad walk's bench. I slip my phone in my pocket and laid down on the bench. So enough. I fell asleep at the beach. ***************************************Next Day************************** I woke up to the sound of seagulls chipping away. I sat up and realize I slept on a bench. At the beach! How crazy is that!? I got up and sleepiy headed back to the hotel. I walk into an acholo shop. (I know the age limit is 21 to drink, but in this story, its 17.) I walk to the fridge and saw the best looking and best seller drink there. I paid it and start to drink it. Its a 3 litre drink... Looks like I'm not going to make it. I took a sip, the iquid burning in my throat, making me crave for more. I made my way to the hotel room, half of the bottle drunk. I stumble my way to the floor and fell inffront of the door. My eyes imdinatley shut. ********************************Zayns Pov, day before************************* I walk to the hotel room to see the boys at Liliana's door, lnwong its not good. "What happen?" I cried as I made my way to her door. "She ran in crying and we have no idea why." Niall answers. "What did you do Malik?" Liam says. "Nothing. There was a photographer talikg photos of us kissing and I told her to come back so she would be safe." I explain as tears ran down my face. "Zayn... You alright?" Brookelynn asks as she walk into the room. "No!" I shout and ball my eyes out on the couch.

Notes

Sorry for the sad sad SAD chapter. the reason why I put self harm in it is to show the pain and stress Liliana's going through. And I've slef harm myself several times.