'Cause you are the piece of me I wish I didn't need
Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don't know why
~Clarity, ZEDD

Alessia/Harry

Alessia stands in front of the huge building. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before picking the small duffel bag on her left. Her left foot is still bruised, she cautiously limps her way towards the entrance.

She clears her throat to seek the receptionist’s attention, “Johannah Poulston, please.”

“What’s your name?” she asks raising her eyebrows.

“Aless--I mean Alexis. Alexis Tomlinson.”

“Just give me a second, hun,” the brunette chirps. She types a few words before looking up at her with a sad smile. “Room 421. 4th floor, five doors to your right.”

Alessia nods, she walks towards the elevators. “I’m sorry about your mum, Alexis.” Alessia looks back with a questioning glance, but the receptionist is busy filing someone else’s report.

She rubs her sweaty palms on her jeans before pressing the ‘up’ button. She jumps back as the doors open with a ‘ding’ sound. Her heart races in her chest, and she swipes a trembling palm across her forehead which has formed thick sweat beads. She gasps as the elevator ‘dings’ again. She takes slow steps out of the elevator, wishing that the elevator ride should have been longer.

She trips over her own feet, stumbles and holds on to the wall for support. Her breathing turns ragged, nervousness tingling in her veins, and a fear. She forms a fist with her fingers and digs her nails into the skin of her palm. Five doors to your right. She looks to her right. And spots the unmissable lot instantly.

Her subconscious as usual pushes her to take the way way out. To turn away and not look back, but what she calls the ‘selfish part’ of herself forces her to walk towards them. None of them have looked her way yet and it takes everything in her not to turn away. She forces her feet to move, ignoring the warning in her brain.

“Hi,” she whispers staring at her battered converse’s laces. She receives no reply, she looks back up through her eyelashes, and clears her throat before giving a louder and stronger greeting. Her eyes though, are still glues to her shoes.

“Love, we’re in a bigger problem here. So, can we please not do the autographs and photos now.” The accent is unmistakably Irish, and a tear rolls down her cheek.

“Don’t cry. I--I’ll do it,” Niall says, a rough chuckle escapes from her throat. Not everything had changed. Niall was still the little leprechaun, who was sucker for tears. She looks back up and into his eyes. If anyone would forgive her it would be Niall.

An expression of recognition flickers on his face, but that’s only for a moment before he holds out his hand expecting an autograph book. Alessia realizes her hair is still blonde, although it had started turning brown near the very ends.

“I…”

“Just get it over with,” someone snaps. Alessia stares at her laces hard and long to keep the tears away. Louis.

Harry looks up from his phone, to see whoever is creating such a commotion. He finds a blonde head and then his green eyes find the all too familiar gray ones. The phone tumbles from his hand and falls to the floor, creating a crashing sound. Everyone’s eyes snap towards him, annoyed. Except the one pair which he could find in millions. “Angel?” he whispers taking a step towards the girl. He watches her swallow, and turn away.

“Harold!” Louis cries, his nose red with anger, “that’s enough.” He says not giving a second look to the frail girl standing under Niall’s stony glare.

Ignoring Louis’s death glare and Cara’s pained eyes he takes quick and precise steps towards stopping when they are almost chest to chest. His hand trail down her face, her nose, her cheeks, her lips, as if confirming she was really here, not one of those heart-breaking illusions. “Lex.”

Against everything screaming in her body to wrap her arounds him she pushes him away with an icy look, and regrets looking at his face after. His beautiful features are filled with pain and hurt...and love. “M-mum? Dan?” she swallows for the millionth time gazing around the room for answers.

“Why do you care? Why do you give a fucking damn? Ah let me think...no you goddamned don’t! Go di--” Louis looks at her his usually warm sea-green eyes are icy, “Just leave Alexis, it’s best for all of us.”

“I--”

“We all know how much you fucking care, so no use pretending. Alright?” Alessia opens her mouth.

“That’s enough Louis,” Harry says calmly but sternly.

“Damnit Harold! I told you once, I’ll say it again. She’s over you we all just witnessed it,” Harry gulps, “you’ve got a wonderful girl right there.” He says pointing to Cara who has her head hung low. “So move your pathetic ass over that selfish bitc--” The sentence is finished because Harry’s palm connects to Louis’s face at the exact moment. Alessia gasps rushing forward to Louis. The others stay glued to their positions used to the regular fights between Louis and Harry.

“Don’t you fucking dare touch me Alexis. I cannot fucking believe I was ever proud to call you my sister!” Alessia, as usual, swallows her tears before looking back at them. She blinks rapidly before speaking.

“I...I just came to see mum,” she whispers tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Harry winces as of the words hit him like a bullet in the heart. He looks back into Alexis’s gray eyes, he bites his lip before turning away.

“Well mum doesn’t want to see her bitch of a daughter.” Alessia flinches at Lou’s harsh words. She opens her mouth to apologize but Harry is quicker.

“Louis you can’t control what Johannah wants, I’m pretty sure she wants her daughter. Everyone isn’t as heartless as you, whatever she did,” Harry says giving a side glance to Alessia, “there must have been a reason. I’m pretty sure her mum understands that.”

“Shut up Harry! Just shut up! You don’t need to fucking defend me!” Alessia cries angrily, but her voice was laced with desperation. “I’m not a kid okay? I can take care of myself. And he’s right I’m a selfish and heartless bitch.” Harry stares back at her, his eyes were wide in confusion and hurt, “that’s why I’m gonna leave ‘cause I don’t fucking give a damn!”

Alessia throws her bag over her shoulder and without looking back walks down the hallway back to the elevator. She punches the button with all her strength and rests her head against the cool metal waiting for the doors to open. She blinks rapidly to keep her tears at bay. “Damnit!” she mutters under her breath when the elevators don’t ding. Although everything in her wants to turn back and confess everything that’s killing her on the inside she kicks the doors open and runs down the stairs. She doesn’t even try to hold back the tears it’s no use.

Everyone was too mad at Alexis to notice the way her sweatshirt covered her figure too much or the fresh blue-black bruise that had appeared right under her eye when she had wiped her eyes. All except Cara.

Alessia/Cara

Alessia drops the bag to the ground and falls on the bench. The silent tears streaming down her face turn into ugly sobs, as she covers her face with her hands

“Alexis,” Alessia wipes her mascara-ringed eyes with her sleeves and looks up to the unfamiliar voice and face. She’s gorgeous.

“Hi?” she mumbles pulling the sleeves lower than they already are. She shoves her hands inside her pockets. She dares to look back up again. “H-how do you know me?” she says wiping her nose.

“Harry described you all too vividly. ‘The Most Gorgeous Girl on The Planet’ wasn’t that hard to figure out.” she says giving Alessia a small smile and sitting beside her.

“H-harry?” Alessia asks meekly looking at Cara through her eyelashes. “You know him?”

“Who doesn’t know Harry?” she asks, chuckling slightly. Alessia laughs genuinely for the first time in ages. “And if they know Harry they obviously know the infamous Alexis Tomlinson.” Cara says softly.

“What did he tell you?” Alexis asks. Although she wanted Harry to hate her, she couldn’t bear the thought of him hating her. She’d fallen hard for him and there was no going back. He hadn’t been there when she needed him most and she wouldn’t have it any other way. (A/N: I know that sounds confusing but it’ll make sense later)

“A better question would be what he didn’t tell me,” Cara grins. “Well he told me how beautiful you are, how nice and kind, sympathetic and loving,” she lists off counting on her fingers and Alessia zones out, but what catches her attention is, “the best thing that ever happened or will happen to him. The one thing that he needs more than he needs to breathe.” Alessia’s gray eyes pool with tears and she turns away. Cara places an arm around her. “He loves you.”

“And you love him.” Alessia states. Cara jerks away red color flushes her cheeks and she stares at her knotted fingers in her lap.

“We’re just friends,” she mumbles.

“I let him go Cara, and if you love him, you can have him. Just promise me you’ll never hurt him like I did.” Cara looks up shocked.

“You still love him don’t you?” She asks.

“Yes, I do. More than any human has loved another. And love means letting go, it means making the other person happy and he can never be happy with me.”

Cara looks up startled, “He can only ever be happy with you,” she replies. “He loves you like crazy, Alexis. It’s stupid he doesn’t look at another girl. Nine months, and he still is head over heels for you, and you know it.”

“I should go.” Alessia whispers standing up.

“You’re taking the easy way out, Lexi.”

“I’m taking the easy way out. Hell yeah, I am. The easiest thing to do would be walking in there,” she yells pointing to the big building, “and confessing everything that’s eating me alive. This,” she cries pointing to herself,” is the most difficult thing I’m doing in my life!”

“Hey,” Cara whispers standing up, “do you wanna talk about it?”

“No,” she replies firmly picking up the bag. “No one wants me here. I’m gonna leave, and this time I won’t return no matter how much I want to or need to.” she swipes a hand across her cheek. “Take care of him for me, make him laugh, hold him when he cries, stand up for him. Do everything I could. Most importantly just...just love him,” she whispers letting out a sob,”even though loving him isn’t the easiest thing to do,” she chuckles, “when Harry loves he loves with all his heart and soul he’d take a bullet for the people he loves, and I know you deserve him” she sniffles and wipes her eyes with the back of her hand, “be the sister I couldn’t be for Louis, he isn’t always like that. And maybe someday, remind all of them that they are my world, and I have always loved them from all my heart I’m very sorry for everything. Take care of the twins, and...make Harry fall in love with you.”

Alessia throws the duffel bag over her shoulder and limps out the huge gates. Tears slip from Cara’s eyes and she sits back on the bench, processing what happened. She watches Alexis’s small figure disappearing.

Harry/Cara

Realizing what happened, Cara sprints back into the hospital and rushes up the stairs.

She stands in front of the group trying to catch her breath, “s-she left.”

“Obviously she did. Like I said she doesn’t care.” Louis says running a hand through his hair and sitting back on the plastic chair. Harry gives Louis a long and hard stare before taking the stairs down. He sprints past the reception and winces as the cold London air hits him.

He eventually catches the familiar pattern of his feet on the pavement and turns every corner and bend in search of ‘his angel’.

“You crossed the line Louis,” Cara says glaring at him. Louis’s eyes widen in shock and he stares at Cara. “All of you, actually. Didn’t you realize how sick she looked?! She could barely stand. I never realized how cold hearted you all were!” Cara eyes catching everyone’s attention by now. “If she didn’t give a damn,” she says pointed glaring at Louis, “she had no reason to be here. No one told her to. I cannot believe what cold heartless bastards you all are. She fucking loves every single one of you and that’s what you leave her with. She deserves better, so much better.”

“Ca--”

“Don’t fucking talk to me!” she yells wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “You know when Harry first told me about her, I seriously thought he was exaggerating because no one can be that kind and loving, but now that I’ve met her...whatever Harry told feels less. You said you couldn’t believe you ever called her your sister, right?” she asks taking a step towards Louis. “I cannot fucking believe she can still love you!” Cara storms down the hallway.

Louis

The others sit in stunned silence, until the doctor steps out of the room. “Can I go in now?” Louis asks standing up.

“I--I’m very sorry to inform you, neither of them made it. The babies are okay but they are premature.” Louis’s knees buckle and he falls to the floor. Just in one day he lost all the people he loved most. “I’m sorry, and you can go inside,” the doctor whispers and walks down the hallway.

“Lou,” Eleanor whispers squatting beside him, she hugs him tightly and Louis sobs into her shoulder.

“I think Alexis should know about this,” Liam says pulling out his phone. Louis lets out a but I couldn’t be the brother she wanted.” Both of them stay wrapped up in each others arms for a long time.

Harry/Alessia

“I’ll do whatever you want just stay okay? Everyone needs you, here, ange--Lexi. Louis is pretending to be a coldhearted arse hole but he nees you too. Just stay goddamnit!” he says Alessia’s arms.

The phone in his pocket buzzes and he irritably pulls it out. “The fuck do you want Liam?” he says annoyed.

Alessia looks at the boy she has fallen for. His lips moving inaudibly as he runs his hands through the messy curly hair she loves playing with. Not everyone would notice the black circles under his eyes, but Alessia had his face memorized all too well. His hands were gentle but firm on her arms, shivers run down her spine, even though thick fabric is separating their skins. She turns away when his eyes land on her but the tears swimming in his eyes are noticeable by then.

“Lexi,” he whispers as of approaching a wounded animal, “Lex, Johannah and Dan…they didn’t make it, baby,” whatever Harry says after that falls on deaf ears. He pulls her into his arms and whispers soothing things, but the only thing that can sooth her right now is her mum’s lap, and she’s gone.

Harry carefully picks her up and walks back to the hospital. Cara is standing at the gate, she rushes to him as she sees his approaching figure. “Is she okay?” she asks, standing on her toes to look at Lexi who has her head placed against Harry’s chest.

Harry doesn’t answer, they silently walk back to the fourth floor hallway, where Louis hasn’t stopped bawling. Harry gently places her on a plastic chair and sits on his knees in front of her, murmuring something but Alessia doesn’t hear a thing. God knows how long they sit there, hours or days. But when Alessia opens her eyes she is lying on her bed. Her bed in Louis and Harry’s flat. She looks around the room, everything is the same except the old guitar that isn’t in the room at all.

She closes her eyes once again wishing for the past months to be a dream, when she wakes up again she is greeted by Harry’s beautiful face. She looks into his dull green eyes, his pink lips. Without knowing what’s happening she leans towards him, his hot breath hits her face, her eyes flutter close. She hears his breath hitch but he leans in anyway, his lips barely touch hers, soft like feather and familiar like the back of her hand.

Realization hits her and she turns away quickly, she gets off the bed and walks out of the door, she’s greeted by the most beautiful sound she has ever heard. She follows the cries and sees them in Louis’s arms. She squats beside him on the floor and looks down at the beautiful faces. A tear rolls down her cheek.

“They’re fraternal,” Louis says placing them gently on Lexi’s lap. She looks up flustered, “you’re their sister. I can’t take that away from you.”

Alessia smiles softly at him, “thanks.” she says kissing both their noses. “What did you name them?” she asks.

“We are going to name them,” he replies. And Alessia can’t help but smile widely.

They banter back and forth for hours, and for once it feels like nothing is wrong. Finally they both decide on the names ‘Felicity Dawn Tomlinson’ and ‘Jason Clark Tomlinson’ now that Louis was their official guardian.

After a while both of them quietly look at the babies. Felicity is lying in Louis’s arms, she would be an exact copy of Lexi if she had a dimple, with the same chestnut hair and gray eyes. Jason on the other hand is a copy of Louis with his light brown hair which almost looks blonde and blue-green eyes, and a dimple on his left cheek like Lexi.

Felicity starts crying, and Louis panics he stands up, and paces around the room. “Is she hungry? Maybe she needs a diaper change? Does she want to sleep?”

“Lou.” Alessia says trying to catch his attention. “Louis! It’s fine, calm down.” Jason listening to his sister cry bursts into sobs too. Alessia carefully stands up and hold both the babies in her arms. She spots Harry who is standing by the door, his head leaning against the door frame.

Words slip out of her mouth before she realizes, “When the days are cold, and the cards all fold…”

A small smile plays on Harry’s lips as he hears the voice he has been waiting to hear for so long. Her gaze is fixed on his green eyes as she continues, “I want to hide the truth, I want to shelter you.” The cries subside as Felicity and Jason look up at their sister in awe. “When you feel my heat, look into my eyes. It's where my demons hide, it's where my demons hide. Don't get too close, it's dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

For the first time Harry notices the hurt and pain in her gray eyes, her eyes are glassy as she whispers the words, a fresh bruise blooms under her eye as she sings the words in her angelic voice, “It's woven in my soul, I need to let you go. Your eyes, they shine so bright, I want to save that light. I can't escape this now, unless you show me how.” Alessia realizes that she has been staring at Harry shifts her gaze to the babies who are peacefully sleeping in her arms. She kisses both their foreheads, and puts them into the crib. She angrily wipes her moist eyes.

“Don’t you think that was a really sad song, being the first song they heard?” Cara asks. Alessia chuckles but doesn’t answer.

She turns around to find Harry standing in front of her. “Where did I go wrong?” he asks hoarsely.

“Nothing Harry! Damnit! You didn’t do anything, it’s my fault. I should have never fallen for you it was all a mistake and I’m trying to correct it. Everything, all of this,” she says faking a cough to cover a sob, “was never supposed to happen. It was beautiful while it lasted but it was wrong.”

She walks past him but Harry grabs her arms. Pain shoots up her arm as he hits a bruise, she winces but Harry’s jade eyes are fixed upon her gray ones, “If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?”

Notes

Happy New Year 2014, loves!! :) This was your New Year gift, that's literally worth two updates. It was supposed to be up yesterday but I had to go to a New Year's eve party. Anyhow, how'd you like the chapter? Lot of drama up there, yeah? I don't even remember it anymore, and I'm in no mood to proof read it. Uhmm yeah so the bold thingy that's all important things, they'll come in use in other chapters. And I know it doesn't make a lot of sense now but it eventually will.

1. How do you feel about Lexi coming back? Do you think she's gonna stay?
2. Did you like the baby names?
3. What about Scott? Is he gonna lay back?

And comment whatever other thoughts your have, because I love you comments. Obviously I love your votes and subscriptions too. So do it, yeah? Luv y'all and Stay Beautiful xxx

Happy New Year once again!

Oh and yeah I keep on forgetting to add it but I decided to make an ask.fm account. So yeah, you can ask me questions about anything there, literally anything. Just nothing inappropriate! xD