Everything (To Nothing)

"Can you believe this is our last first day back from holidays?"

No, I couldn't.

As we walked through the all too familiar halls of the school, my best friend Aubrey had been talking a mile a minute. It seemed like only yesterday that we were starting our year, when I was starting my university placement… I refused to let that train of thought continue.

"Ivory," Aubrey called, waving her hand in front of my face. "Hello, anyone home?"

"Sorry, Aubs. I can't believe it."

"Me either! It's only the first day back but I'm so excited, we're almost finished!"

As we walked down the hallway, we bumped into a group of girls and Aubrey had to say hello. I knew them, but Aubrey was the mouthpiece of the friendship, and I found talking to most of the girls here awkward as I had no interest in gossiping.

"Aubrey, Ivory! Guess what?" Darcey said, while all the girls giggled.

"What's up?"

"So I was talking to Eleanor who had English Literature this morning, and she said there is the hottest student teacher ever!"

"Oh my god, we have it now! Having Mr Malik isn't bad enough, how the hell am I going to be able to concentrate now?!" Aubrey exclaimed.

The girls chatted a little more before I pulled Aubrey away, reminding her that we shouldn't be late on the first day.

Of course, she went on about the student teacher all the way to the class, and started again when we sat down as neither he nor Mr Malik had arrived yet.

The students started to file in, and Aubrey left me alone to hurriedly tell Perrie who was sitting on her other side about the gossip. I started doodling on the front of my new notebook whilst waiting.

The girls in the class started tittering, yet I didn't notice or look up until I heard Mr Malik speak.

"Afternoon, guys! Nice work on not flunking out and sticking with us for the last few months. We're going to be looking at modern satire, which I'm sure some of you will actually enjoy for a change. We also have a student teacher who is going to be joining us for the last term," Mr Malik said, gesturing to the other man up the front.

As I looked over, my mouth almost dropped to the floor.

"Hi, My name is Louis, but to you I'm Mr T," he said, giving a friendly wave.

"So, if I can get you to get out your textbooks and turn to chapter eight, page 59…"

Shock was set in my brain and I couldn't get it to work right. I fumbled with the zip on my bag and finally found the textbook, my hands fumbling around feebly in the process.

I could see Aubrey desperately trying to get my attention from the desk next to me, but I ignored her to the best of my ability, turning to my textbook and burying my nose in it. I was successful at ignoring her until she shoved a bit of notepaper under my nose.

He is sooooo fit!!!! A x

"So today we're going to be looking at Vonnegut…"

I hid the notepaper and ignored it. Unfortunately Aubrey was persistent, and started flicking bits of eraser at me. Mr Malik looked up at her.

"Do you have something to share with the class, Aubrey?"

At that moment, Louis went to look over at Aubrey, yet he spotted me instead. His eyes went wide and I immediately looked down at the textbook.

Aubrey's cheeks blazed. "No, sorry Mr Malik."

"So can you please stop trying to drown Ivory in eraser? Thank you."

Her concentration lasted for about three minutes before another note was indiscreetly slipped under my book.

Why does Mr T keep looking at you??

She glared until I slowly pulled out the paper. As I read it, my cheeks flushed and Aubrey giggled.

"Aubrey, I'm serious. I will give out a detention on the first day," Mr Malik reprimanded.

Aubrey was kept off my back after that. Unfortunately, as soon as we were told we could pack up our things, she pounced.

"So?! What are you hiding?" she asked, at my desk before most people had even stood up.

I looked up to find Louis looking at me, stepping in my direction, before Mr Malik called his attention, and he reluctantly went back.

"Be quiet!" I whispered. "I'll tell you when we leave."

With that, I rushed out of the classroom.

~-~

After the lesson, I'd feigned sickness and signed out of school early, which was completely out of character for me. During the walk home I had all but decided to pretend he didn't exist and get on with my classes. I was convinced that he would've moved on, and while I pretended not to care, in reality I knew I would be hurt.

I wasn't bitter, but as university drew closer Louis appeared in my thoughts more often. I couldn't help but wonder if he'd still be there, if he still lived with Niall, if he'd still want to talk to me...

I figured I owed Aubrey an explanation and decided to call her once I knew she'd be home and told her the story.

"It's your Louis?! I don't believe it. You didn't tell me he was that cute! Didn't he do the same course as you? I didn't know he was becoming a teacher."

"Trust me, I'm just as surprised as you. I knew he was doing a teaching course before but he dropped it… I guess he took it back up?"

"I know your rose tinted glasses are all the way off and in the bin, but I'm going to call this one as fate."

I hesitated before answering. "It isn't, Aubrey. Either way, he's probably found someone else by now." Even I couldn't hide the note of sadness in my voice.

"It'll be okay, whatever happens, Pebbles. You'll be right," she said soothingly, seriousness touching her voice - something that didn't happen very often.

"I told you not to call me that anymore!" I grumbled.

"That's your fault for being so obsessed with her and dressing up as her when you were little. Parents are calling me to dinner, but this chat isn't over. Bye!"

~-~

The next morning, I'd barely taken two steps from my locker before I was faced with Mr Malik.

"Morning, Ivory. How are you?"

"I'm good… how are you?" I was confused - I can't say I've ever seen him around before class started.

"Not bad. Listen, could you meet me in my office in 5? Just want to discuss some university options."

"But- I mean Mr. Malik, I already started my university placement. Queens College has been my dream-"

"Either way, I'd just like to show you some other options. I'll see you there." And with that, he walked off in the opposite direction of his office.

I was surprised at the way he was acting, normally he wouldn't push things like that. He was one of the most understanding about the university placement; some teachers tried to talk me out of it as they thought it would affect my grades.

I decided to slowly walk to his office as I didn't have anything to do and Aubrey had texted me to tell me she'd be late. I meandered out of the hallway of lockers, plugged in my earphones and listened to the new The xx album as I walked.

I'd tried to walk slowly, but I found myself outside before the first song had even finished. It didn't look as though he was back yet. I opened the door and stepped inside to sit down before a movement, or rather a person leaning against the store cupboard startled me.

"Ivory? I think we need to have a chat, yeah?"

Notes