“Someone said you had your tattoo removed,
Saw you downtown, singing the blues,
It’s time to face the music
I’m no longer your muse.”
The One That Got Away – Katy Perry

Mum once told me of a story about two different people, who knew from the very moment they met one another that it was destiny. They were fated to be with each other.

The young man was a traveler; an ambitious, very curious, bright lad who wanted to explore the whole world and see the beauty of it. An orphan to wealthy parents, who died in a tragic train accident back when he was just eleven, he’s never called their Victorian house in the country side of Abbey his home. So when he was old enough to travel by himself, he didn’t waste any time and left. He went to places. He’s seen majestic things that he considered the finest things in life, sailed the seven seas out of the hunger for adventure. Met people of different culture, different race. He’s seen the world and the beauty of it, all in the tender age of twenty-four. He’s gone to the farthest part of the north, saw how life is in the busy streets of New York, learned the art of the traditional tea ceremony in Japan and dived under the deepest blue sea of Australia.

One cloudy day, he found himself lost in the small town of Cheshire. But he let himself get lost for the place was just inviting. Something about the peace and serenity told him to stay.

Little did he know for himself, he has finally found home.

He met her upon stumbling to a local park. The young lady was sitting in one of the swings, a book in her hand and a breathtaking smile etched in her face as she ran her fingers to the pages of it. He watched her and his heart skipped a beat. He’s never seen anything more beautiful than the girl. He can’t compare the beauty he’s seen on her to anything grand in the whole world. In that moment, he told himself, he found the one.

The girl was a young dreamer. She lived in her own fantasy world inside the thousands of books she read. A believer to everything pure cliché, when she saw the young man staring at her with a gorgeous smile in his face, she thought she’s met a real life prince charming, a dashing debonair who will sweep her off her feet and maybe give her a life with a happily ever after.

It was love at first sight.

Fast forward to the story, two months later, they got married. She was just seventeen, but she didn’t care. They were in love. So in love, the world didn’t matter at all. It was everything she’s dreamt of.

He was everything she’s asked for. She was his whole world. They put their love in the center of their universe.

They built a house of their own where they imagined both of them grown old together. He always surprised her with little things. He’s always told her he loved her more than anything in the world. He told her she was his greatest adventure. Three months after getting married, the young girl found out she was pregnant. They were excited. In just nine months, they will then have a child and be a family.

August 12, 1993. At exactly 9:02 in the evening, she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl with a pair of bright grey colored eyes just like her father and that same heart pink lips her mother has. They loved her more than the world. She was their little angel, a precious gift from heaven to the young couple.

They named her Campbelle, which dearly meant she was their ‘light of life’. The very moment they saw her tiny little mouth form a smile, they said she’s the most beautiful girl they have ever seen.

Campbelle Laine Brooks, their little angel who will be a young man’s dream girl someday.

For years, they lived their life together in peace and harmony. He worked in a local pub to support his family’s needs. She worked two careers at a time –a full time mother in the morning, and then at night, she continued her studies for two years in the town’s college. Both of them worked together for a promise of a bright future for their family. They always make the most out of it. They were a happy family. They couldn’t ask for more.

But then in life, there come struggles, and that’s what they weren’t emotionally ready for. They lived with the tightest grip of trust and love to one another that they didn’t expect someone would lose a hold and they would come crashing all together.

Her father wanted to travel again, said he missed his life back then and he wanted them to come with him and see the world in a different perspective. But her mother was contented of their life back in Cheshire. And with a child, it’s just not practical because the future of their child and their whole family is the only priority now.

The man wasn’t the same lad the woman fell in love with. Out of a sudden, he didn’t want to be a family man anymore, said it wasn’t him. He wanted adventure just like those days before when he’s younger and with no obligations but himself. He didn’t want them anymore. He said it wasn’t the life he wanted.

Then four year old Campbelle saw how her parents falter right before her eyes. Such innocence was lost when she saw how her father lost control of him and slapped her mother in the face. It happened not just once, but more than the times she could ever imagine her own father would do to his own wife, the mother of his child, the woman who he promised to live a life until death do they part.

One cold night in the middle of September 1997, her father left. There was no note saying he’s sorry for leaving them, or he’s sorry for what happened to their family. He just left them completely broken.

Her mother never cried, never showed how devastated she is inside, not when little Campbelle was there to see her break down. She wanted to show her child that she was brave, that she was strong, and that things will be okay. She promised little Campbelle her father will come back because he loves them. He’ll come back no matter what because they’re his home.

He never did.

The man I was supposed to call my father left me and my Mum.

He didn’t want us anymore. He threw us out of his life because he’s just a selfish person. He ran away from all the responsibilities he was supposed to provide to me and my mother.

His words of love were all lies. He said he loved us more than himself, but those were just words, words that meant nothing when he decided to choose his own happiness instead of us. It just took him days to figure out himself that he didn’t love us anymore. He loved himself more than his own child, his own wife, his own family.

My own father deceived us of what’s truly love.

And that’s why I never believed in love before. I learned for myself that once you love, your world would revolve around lies, and I didn’t want that to happen. I didn’t want to love if it’s meant to crumple me. I didn’t give my trust to anyone that easily. I didn’t trust anyone other than me and my Mum. In the mere age of five, I was already clustered in the high walls that I promised myself I’ll never let anyone hurt me just like what my father did to my Mum. I won’t let someone promise me his life just like my father did and just have me ruined.

I promised I won’t fall for love because love is just plain bullshit.

It took Mum a whole year to realize that her husband will never come back. Two days before my sixth birthday, she told me we had to move. I will never forget how I eagerly packed my things and left without looking back. The place that was once filled with happiness just became my own personal nightmare. It felt like the world closed to me that I couldn’t breathe. Nobody would ever see them because of the façade I made for myself. For a six year old, I was a wreck as a child but I kept myself together because I don’t want my Mum to see that I hurt because the pain she keeps all this time was enough to ruin her own. I’ve got my own selfish reasons, but I just want my Mum to forget that whole disaster that happened to us back in Cheshire.

Moving to Wolverhampton wasn’t easy at first. The town, the neighborhood itself where we moved, was just different than that in Cheshire. There were a lot more people, and loads of happy families that made me sick and bitter. What six year old girl would feel bitter of life?

I was.

How did that happen? It just did. There was no way I could explain how it exactly happened. I just felt life turned away from us. No innocent child would ever experience the pain that stirred deep inside heart. No one would understand me, why I sheltered myself away from people’s feelings towards me. The pain has grown into me. Somehow, it became me. I have grown numb to even feel anyone, and I didn’t care that I was that way. I’d rather be left alone than to see what was left of my shattered young heart.

But even when I turned down to life, it still gave me a reason to smile, to breathe, and to live.

I unexpectedly befriended a kid named Liam Payne. He and his whole family lived next door to our new house and was the first kid to ever talk to me. He saw us moving in and helped us with our stuff. Such a nice boy, my Mum always said. That very same afternoon, Liam’s mother, Mrs. Ruth Payne, invited Mum and I to have afternoon tea with them and that was the beginning of our family’s friendship. That was also the very same day that I saw in the eyes of my mother that she’s really moving on.

It was the start of our new life, just the two of us. Our love for one another was already enough. We didn’t need anyone else. It’ll be just Mum and I then.

But the company of Liam and his whole family changed everything of that sense. It’s like magic how their happy family suddenly put smiles to mine and my Mum’s faces. Mum has become good friends with Ruth and Geoff just like how Liam and I became the same.

Liam James Payne, he was the boy I never expected to meet and to be friends with. He’s just different from everybody else. Even when I wasn’t that open to him about my life in the first chapter of our friendship, he stayed with me and was willing to wait till I become comfortable with him.

If it wasn’t for Liam, I wouldn’t have known there was still that young broken girl left inside me. I thought I made myself strong after everything. I thought being numb to the world was what made me strong. He made me realize that I’m just a scared little girl, that I’m still vulnerable of emotions, and that I still need someone –someone like him.

Liam was more than enough to complicate my life, but I still let him in. Other than my Mum, he was the only person I trusted with my life. I believed him. I trusted him with every piece of me. I’ve learned how to love him just like how I loved my Mum, Ruth, Geoff, and his sisters like we’re a huge family all together. Liam was the only person I shared everything I truly felt inside me because I know he’ll understand me more than anyone else. He knows me more than I know myself. He bravely jumped over the high threshold I built round myself and stayed there with me. Even when we’ve literally fucked our friendship with all the stupid things we’ve done, we stayed together. Even when he became a superstar, when he met other best friends, when I had to share him with the rest of the world, we still stuck together. Through thick and thin, I believed I’ll always have him.

Since then, I told myself, Liam Payne was all that I’ll ever need to survive this complicated life.

But then Zayn Malik came to my life, and everything else just changed.

I learned how to love.

I loved.

I loved us.

And I was right about love all his time.

Because that love killed what was all left of the innocent young girl inside of me.

----------(The Way We Are)----------

I felt everyone’s angry stares at me. They bore like daggers that went through my skull as I watched Zayn and Perrie walked down in the middle of the red carpet of the grand ballroom. If looks could kill, I’d be in ashes in a matter of seconds.

I could hear them murmur my name just behind me, asking what in the world was I doing there? I shouldn’t be there. I shouldn’t be there because I wasn’t supposed to be there. I wasn’t supposed to be standing there, in the middle of people, watching the man I loved and ruined take another girl’s hand in marriage.

All I did was to look at him, see how beautiful he is with that smile in his face as he walked with Perrie. How his eyes sparkled and showed how happy he is at that very moment while their guest cheered for him and her. Missed it how his eyes once stared at me like that before. He looked better than how I saw him in the television not so long ago.

Zayn’s happy, and it started sinking in to me as I watched him hold on to the hands of the girl he’s going to marry now.

All I wanted was to leave, for their eyes to stop looking at me. They recognized me -eyeballing me like I was a leper. They knew I was that girl, that Campbelle Brooks, standing in between Harry and Liam. My hands were shaking because of anxiety as I hold on to Liam’s grasp on my forearm while Harry’s arms in my waist kept me still from collapsing on the floor because my legs were all weak. If it wasn’t for them, I’d be a wrecking mess for everyone to see.

My throat was choked with tears that I would not let fall, not when everyone’s looking at me with disgust, but they were there all the same. It reminded me of that one stupid mistake because I trusted a supposed friend with all my heart. Reminding me of the way Louis and Mitchie had tricked me and called me out to stand there in front of everyone.

Even if Liam and Harry were on my side, I was still alone in here. No one could save me now because it was my fault why I’m there, about to cause drama neither I, myself, was ready for.

Said trouble started when Perrie caught my eyes and stopped dead in her tracks just to stare at me. Zayn did so to and glanced to where Perrie was staring. I saw how his brown eyes widen as he recognized me there, how scared he was the moment he realized it was really me standing there with tear glistening in my eyes. He wasn’t expecting I’d be present in his engagement party, with only a few steps away from him. I saw how Perrie glanced back at Zayn, her smile just faded as quick as how his did soon after he recognized me there with Liam and Harry.

If it was possible for time to stop, then that’s exactly what it did.

Both of them stared in silence, watched me back with bated breath. The music around didn’t stop, but everyone’s cheer muted and I was a hundred percent sure that everyone was now looking at us. For those who were oblivious I was there before now knew I really was there, and they sucked the life out of me even less than what was left at all.

But Zayn’s stare was different. His eyes were the ones I felt the most. They bored into me almost painfully, like I’ve been literally gutted deep in my soul –that painful. There was no need to say words out. His eyes showed it all.

Zayn clearly didn’t want me to be there.

And that’s when I faltered.

“Come on, Campbelle.” Liam quickly whispered in my ears as he pulled me closer to his body. Harry pushed people away and cleared a path for Liam and I to walk out. Liam put his hands right in front of my face to shield it for everyone to see I crumbled down to tears. All I did was to hide my face in my hands the entire time Liam and Harry assisted me out of the grand ballroom, away from all the guest that was confused what just happened there.

Inside my head, I kept telling myself this couldn’t be happening. Zayn wasn’t supposed to see me tonight. Nobody was supposed to see me. I was supposed to be moving on with what’s worthy to save in my life. He wasn’t supposed to see me break in pieces because he’s getting married to someone else.

When we got outside, I immediately lunged myself into Liam’s and cried everything to him. Every word that I couldn’t say out loud was drowned down into pitiful tears that dampened his coat and my face. My best friend just did what he could do, wrapped his arms around me and let me cry all my sorrow at him. I was in so much pain. That same intolerable pain I wished never to feel again, but now I do all over again –triple the feeling even. It punctured every breathing second of my whole being. I felt the world come crashing into me with that one look Zayn gave me.

The people in the lobby were no different from the ones inside the ballroom. I could feel them looking straight at me, why on earth was there a girl, bawling her heart out while she grasped on to Liam Payne from One Direction like he was holding on to her whole life in his arms.

Liam’s arms were tight around me like he wasn’t planning of letting me go for the world to see how much of a disaster I currently am. I didn’t know what to think. I couldn’t think at all. All I know is that I’m hurting and that I needed to cry it all out at Liam.

My chest heaved because I was gasping for air as my sobbing continued on. “How did you get here Campbelle? I thought you didn’t want to go?”

“Liam, it doesn’t matter. Someone needs to take her away from here.” I heard Harry’s voice said from my other side.

“Let’s go home, Campbelle. I’ll take you home.” Liam whispered softly against my cheek.

I then felt another hand held on my arm and tried to tug me away from Liam, “No, I’ll take her back to my apartment.”

“Harry, I can take care of her by myself.” Liam pondered back at him, quite aggressively this time.

“But Liam, you can’t-”

“Yeah Liam, you can’t.” Somebody else announced.

I recognized the voice to be Louis’. The anger and resentment I felt for him and Mitchie immediately rose to every vein of my body. It made me detach myself away from Liam’s hold and turn to look at him. He standing there with the biggest smug look in his face as my eyes met his. Mitchie was next to him, with the same wicked smile etched in her red lips. I swear they were meant to be together because they looked perfect to be the devil and his mistress that stumbled upon this earth to create havoc of a mess towards Campbelle Brooks.

“Where do you think you’re going? You’re the best man. You can’t just leave like that. You’re supposed to be inside with Zayn and Perrie, doing your one job as his best man.” He told him with such haughtiness.

I was standing just behind Liam, fist clutched in balls of fury. I couldn’t give a flying fuck to anyone who’ll see me. I was ready to get aggressive myself.

“God, Liam. You’re choosing that slut over your best friend? You too, Harry? You’re better than this. When are you going to learn your lesson? Are you seriously letting that slut repeat what happened before?”

Strike one.

“Don’t you fucking start with me now, Louis,” Liam growled.

Harry put himself in between the two, arms outstretched to either side as he tried all his might to stop them from fighting further. “Mate, please, just not now.”

Louis just scoffed at him. “What? It’s nothing but the truth. Why are you trying to protect her and her dignity? She’s one dirty slut who’s ruined our friendship because she can’t keep her dirty hands off of you lot!”

Strike two.

“How dare you-!”

Liam tried to step forward and advance at Louis but I pulled him quickly as Harry did push Louis away from Liam himself. “Louis! Liam! Fuck! Stop this right now!” Harry shouted.

But Louis didn’t listen. The fucker never does, ever. He continued his rant, saying, “She deserves to see everything. To see how happy Zayn is now with Perrie because she’s better than that whore of a woman you two are trying to defend.”

Strike two and a half.

“Just shut up Louis. I’m close to hurting you if you say anything more offensive towards Campbelle.” Liam warned him.

Louis let out that annoying, menacing laugh he’s always got and said, “Ha! I wouldn’t be surprise why you’re choosing her. She’s screwing you again, isn’t she? Wow, wow, wow. Well done, Campbelle! You’re still good at what you’re known for. Don’t be fucking stupid, Liam! She doesn’t deserve-”

Strike three. That’s it! You’re out, Tomlinson.

I pushed pass Liam and Harry and slapped Louis with every force that’s left in me.

Harry, Liam and Mitchie stood there frozen. I could hear the people who’ve witnessed the whole drama we’ve made in the middle of Gauthier’s entrance hall just gasped at my sudden action.

My hand trembled as I realized what I just did. It hurt. Louis shot me back a mortified look, like he felt every pain I just did on his face. It wasn’t the first time that I physically hurt Louis, but this was the first time that I totally got lost control of myself. It did not just scare Louis, but I was also scared myself. I acted out of the need.

I needed to defend my best friend.

“Call me whatever you want, but never call Liam stupid.” I told him.

Louis hasn’t said anything back at me, a first of all the instances I had a row with him.

I left Louis’ scorching gaze at mine and turn around so to face Mitchie. “I thought you’re my friend? How could you do this to me?”

She knew I was coming for her. After all, she’s the reason why I was there in the first place. Her lips were on a tight line, both feet ground firmly into the floor. Her eyes met mine with their cool-blue iciness. “Louis is right, Campbelle. Zayn deserves a girl who’s not you. Perrie is so much better than you.”

I kept my eyes trained at her, never blinking, never faltering. She would get nothing from me.

So I told her, with no remorse whatsoever in my voice, “Then screw you as well.”

Mitchie flashed me a disgusted glance before she pulled Louis’s hands and brushed past me, leaving the trail of her signature perfume, not one of them gave me a look back. They just hurriedly returned to the grand ballroom with the rest of the party. I turned to watch Mitchie and Louis leave Harry, Liam and I there, but not an ounce of regret was in me for what I did and said to the both of them.

Blankly, I lowered my eyes to the floor. I was expecting a rip of cry come from throat any second, or a few tears to resurface my eyes, yet there was nothing. I felt no emotion. I felt lost.

When I raised my head back, Harry and Liam were still looking at me, still with the same surprised expression in their face. Liam’s then hardened eyes were back to soft as he stared back at me. Harry’s lips were parted, like he wanted to say something, but no word came out of him. If I was either one of them, I’d be hell a lot of confused with what happened to me too.

I could tell that they’re waiting me to say something, but there was nothing that I could say at that moment. I just lost myself and anguished very anger trained inside me to their best friend, who’s been my best friend once too.

Out of nowhere, vivid memories of that one traumatizing night flooded my thoughts.

The throbbing pain coming from my left hand marked me that I have become the person I hated all my life. I felt like I have just become someone like my father.

There’s so much pain for just one horrible night. I need to do something to forget this.

The tensed silence which surround all three of us were on broken when we’ve heard Niall’s voice coming from the distance. He came running towards us and said, “Harry, Liam, you’re both needed back in the party. Perrie’s looking for the both of you.”

Both Harry and Liam shook their heads at him. “Niall, I don’t think it’s best right now for us to come back in the party. We’re taking Camp away from here.” Liam told him.

“Yeah, Niall, we’re not letting Campbelle go home alone.” Harry added.

“Lads, you don’t want to see Perrie Edwards throw a fit in the middle of two hundred people, don’t you? I swear she could grow another head with the pressure she’s putting in her shoulder just because she’s seen Camp came. This is the worst engagement party I attended, and it’s not even a buffet for Christ’s sake!” He blabbered while all three of us just gave him a look.

“Just please, get back there. If it’s not for Perrie, then do it for Zayn.” Even before Harry or Liam could put a protest, Niall said, “I’ll get Campbelle out of here for the sanity of everyone. I’ve taken care of it.”

With a flick of Niall’s Irish fingers, his car came to the driveway. I’m not kidding when I say it’s magic. I had to blink my eyes a couple of times to believe that Niall really wants to help me now.

“Look, Niall, it’s very nice of you to-”

“No,” I quickly cut in. I turned my head back to Liam and Harry and then said, “Niall is right. You need to get back there.”

“But-”

“Liam, I can take care of myself. Let’s not ruin anyone’s night any further.”

His then tensed shoulders just fell defeated, telling me he wasn’t going to try and protest. Liam understood what I meant. I looked at Harry and said, “Don’t worry about me. You do know I’ve been through a hell lot worse than this night.”

Without wasting any more time, I hopped on to Niall’s car and drove off.

----------(The Way We Are)----------

Niall and I were drowned into silence in the most of the drive. I wouldn’t have minded the silence actually but still, I wanted to ask him about where he’s planning of taking us because we’ve been driving on the highway for might have been an hour tops.

And I was already sure that he wasn’t planning on taking me back to neither Liam’s nor Harry’s flat because even though I sucked big time with directions, I know this isn’t the way to the city, so I have to guess we’re going somewhere else –somewhere far that nobody would guess it’s me and the famous Niall Horan, which hopefully was peaceful enough to make me think of certain things about tonight.

He could have got us lost for all that I know, but I couldn’t care less. It’s was even better if we really are lost. If Niall was taking me somewhere and tell me to leave them alone once again, to be quite honest, I wouldn’t even argue with him and just walk away.

Yet, when I thought of running away, Harry and Liam’s sadden and disappointed face flashes through my mind with the sudden idea. I promised them. I couldn’t do it anymore.

It was when he maneuvered the car from the lane to an exit that Niall decided to speak up. “I’m actually quite surprised you agreed to come with me and get you out of that party.”

“Wouldn’t Perrie be looking for you too?”

Niall just chuckled. “No. I bet she wouldn’t even give a damn if I wasn’t there.”

“But aren’t you best man too?”

“No.”

His statement surprised me. “Why?” I asked.

“Perrie hates me.”

With the crease of confusion still in my face, I repeated my question, “Why?”

He shrugged, glancing at my direction to oppose another question. “You have no idea who Perrie Edwards is, don’t you?”

There is no way in hell will I ever try to know what kind of bitch Perrie Edwards is.

“It doesn’t matter now whether you know her or not. Honestly, she never was a matter of concern for any of us, like ever. Besides, we’re not driving off somewhere to talk about her.”

I didn't ask any more questions, and Niall didn't provide any more answers. Concentrating on the scenery passing us by kept me distracted from everything that sat between us, said and unsaid.

Before I knew it, we were pulling into a lot of at the back of what seems to be a dingy-looking pub. Instinctively, I knew it right away. Niall’s Irish. Of course, the answer to my problem was a barrel or more of strong malted beer.

This might have to suffice than sulking alone in the apartment. I’m making way too many sober decisions lately.

“Here, take this.” Niall took off the grey blazer he wore over his white polo and handed it to me. “It’s pretty cold outside, and I don’t want some old blokes there check you out. He’d probably kill me if I let that happen.”

Without another word, he stepped out of the car and shut the door behind him. Processing the meaning behind his words caused me to lag behind in my seat, replaying the past ten seconds over and over. This wasn’t entirely Niall’s initiative. Someone asked him to help me.

I don’t think it was either Liam or Harry. Well, damn fuck if it’s Louis.

Remember how he stared at you, Campbelle. No.

It was only when I realized that he was waiting for me that I scrambled to unbuckle myself and leapt out of the car, tugging down the hem of the ridiculously short dress Mitchie made me wear. It was just now that I realized that she purposely made me wear it so I’d look exactly as the whore in the party, which made me hate her even more. Niall had made himself comfortable by leaning against the hood of the car. He didn't ask questions. Instead, he pushed himself off with one foot and motioned for me to follow him.

Niall held the door open for me as we got to the front of the pub. In contrast to his hunch, the entire place was actually deserted. And the whole place radiated a just chill vibe, with a few tables set on the floor, a bar, an old looking jukebox over the side and a small television suspended on the corner that was on a game channel. The only person on the premise was a middle aged man who I’m quite sure was the pub owner, drying off some tray of beer mugs in front of him. He saw us stepped inside, with me just a few inches behind Niall, holding his warm forearm. The man greeted us with a loud chortle and exclaimed, “Niall, me boy! I haven’t seen you for ages! How are yah, lad?”

Niall and the pub owner must have known each other. He replied a few rushed words back to the man. I was too lost to understand their thick Irish accents so I just stood there behind him awkwardly. It wasn’t too long when the older man noticed me and heard him asked Niall, “And you’ve got company -a pretty lady here, can I just add!”

“She’s my friend.” Niall told him back, lightly pushing me forward that made me loosen my grip on his arm and look at the man, giving him a small smile and softly I said, “Campbelle, sir.”

“I’m very delighted to meet you, Campbelle. I’m Augustus, the pub owner and just one of Niall’s many uncles.” He said as he carefully ushered both Niall and I to come and sit in one of the already set table. “It’s so nice of you to come and join our Nialler here. He’s never taken a girl in here before! Good for yah, Niall!”

“No, we’re not dating, sir.” I answered quickly, waving my hand at the Uncle.

“Yah Uncle, we just need a few drinks because tonight’s just a bad night for both of us.” Niall added.

“Oh,” Uncle Augustus said, a bit of disappointment in his tone. “I was actually hoping you’re Niall’s girlfriend.”

Oh dear god.

Even the slightest idea of me and Niall dating makes me cringe.

It’s never going to happen because I know Niall’s preference.

I mean, I’m the only one who knows what Niall really likes.

Niall’s secret was just one of my too many skeletons I have sworn to keep in secrecy.

Uncle Augustus excused himself so to get us some beers, leaving Niall and I in silence around us.

I know it was rude to stare but my eyes haven’t left Niall’s face for a second. I was hoping he’d tell me why he’s helping me now when just a few weeks ago he wouldn’t even say a word to me. Was I supposed to trust him now because he took me away from the party? Do I need to say thank you and just leave everything else in the mercy of alcohol?

When he caught me looking at him, his eyes just widen, pretty much telling me I was making him uncomfortable. “Well, this is pretty awkward.” Niall confessed, a blush creeping on his cheeks.

“Yeah, well I think you’ve forgotten I’m awkward.”

“I think you need to know. Nobody’s forgotten about you, Campbelle.”

A few minutes of awkward silence passed before Uncle Augustus served us our first round of beer. Niall haven’t said anything again, instead he glued his eyes on the football match that was current being played on the television.

Out of the five boys of One Direction, Niall and mine’s friendship felt it was always been out of the box. Something about us just clashed; nowhere was our friendship as tight as I have with the other boys. We don’t match personalities because we’re both weird in a sense, and deep inside insecure why we’re on the same page as the other boys. Niall has received the same hate as I did, sometimes even worse because some Directioners are rude to him –from simply asking him not to be in the picture with the rest of the boys up to the point where the fans asks him to leave the band because he’s not as gorgeous as them. Then I found out about his deepest, darkest secret nobody else knows, it completely torn what was a thin line that held our friendship.

But nevertheless, I love Niall for who he is.

If there’s one thing Niall and I do have in common, it’s how stupid we are when it comes to love.

Just like me, once upon a time, Niall loved.

Just like me, he’s scared that love could make or break him.

“How’s Giovanni?”

I am not homophobic. I even support gay rights and the whole rainbow movement. I bet if Niall just confessed to me beforehand that he’s gay, we’ll probably be closer than Louis and I. But ever since I found out about his and Giovanni’s secret affair, Niall thinks I’ll use it to blackmail him so the attention goes to him. I wasn’t like that. I never judged either Niall or Giovanni. He didn’t know. I deeply supported him.

Although I doubt love and its entirety to change a person, I still stand to the fact that nobody has the right to judge a person because of his preference when it comes to who he chooses to love.

I just realized I made a mistake by being too straightforward about asking Giovanni. I meant it that nothing clear was running in my head since I found out I’ve been tricked to come to Zayn’s engagement party.

Niall raised his head and looked at me. His eyes again sparkled with surprise of what I brought to the table, then it changed to forming a frown in his brows and when he didn’t know what exactly to do, he just lowered his head and said, “I don’t know. I haven’t heard from him for more than a year now. He was the one to let go, said it’s for the best because he doesn’t want to ruin my career.” He paused for a bit and breathed deeply. “I’m sorry, but could we please refrain from talking about me being a sexually-confused twenty-two year old? We’ve got other more important things to talk about right now.”

I nod pensively.

“You left us two years ago without even saying goodbye to any of us. I need to know. Why did you leave us?” he asked me.

My breath was hitched in my throat, but I managed to reply a soft, “They said it was for the best.”

But Niall shook his head in disagreement, “That’s whole loads of bullshit. Did you know you just made a bigger mess? You leaving created a whole lot of a bigger mess that got out of hand and look what’s happening now.”

I never have expected that Niall would be the one to have the balls to confront me like this –that it’s been entirely my fault. I should have known this would be his real reason why he brought me here.

“If you’re so mad at me for all the mess that I made to everyone, then why did you help me, Niall? Why now, all of a sudden?”

“I’m not helping you. I’m helping my friend.” He retorted. “There’s so much more that you needed to hear –not just Harry’s or Liam’s side, but I’m not the right person who should tell them to you. I have a reason why I asked you to come with me. I brought you here to ask you a favor. Well… not much of a favor really, but, whatever. I’m doing this because he doesn’t know what he’s doing himself.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Please, Campbelle. Save Zayn from making a mistake.”

Notes

Whoa, whoa, WHOA. You didn’t expect that, did you? Me neither!
Okay, well, I did plan on making Niall’s character interesting. I’ve been seeing a lot of Niam romance on the tour, I’m starting to worship it! And this is my first time to do a slash thingy so please bear with me.

I’d be glad to hear your thoughts about this chapter. Did you like it? Did you hate it? Oh my god, Campbelle’s getting a lot of hell right now.

AND I’d also like to ask for you to tell me which you would rather have her end up with, because I’m still so torn about it.
Do you ship Campbelle & Liam? CIAM!
Do you ship Campbelle & Harry? CAMRRY!
Do you ship Campbelle & Zayn? CAYN/ZELLE!

Happy Halloween everyone! I’m on my way to a friend’s party but I made sure to update first. Yay me!! I expect treats when I get home. THANK YOU!! ;)

@_AndieTiu