The next couple of weeks were some of the hardest.
I think I cried most nights after realising that it was more than just lust that I felt towards Harry.
It was love.
I would drift off in classes and day dream about what it felt like to be in his arms again.
I was head over heels in love with him and I couldn’t do anything about it. He had clearly stated his place, saying that ‘we can’t.’ I knew he was just trying to do the right thing, but it hurt so bad.

English class became easier and easier with every lesson that passed by. I came up with ways to avoid him, like entering the class early and taking a seat at the back so by the time he came in, people were sitting in front of me and blocking me from his view.
I never raised my hand, I always did my homework and left it on his desk so he wouldn’t have to ask for it and I would always be the first to leave at the end of each lesson.
Walking past him in the hallways was never easy, and I don’t think it was going to get any easier anyhow. I was hurting and becoming close to him with each step caused my heart to ache. I hated the way I could feel him looking at me out of the corner of his eyes when I walked by or talked to friends at my locker. He knew exactly what I was feeling and just pretended I didn’t exist.
Perhaps being strangers was easier than being friends.

As I walked through the cafeteria carrying my lunch tray I noticed Daisy, Hannah and Madison sitting at our usual table near the window. I began making my way over when I tripped and knocked my lunch tray over, spilling my juice and salad all over some boy I had never met before.
“Oh my god I’m so sorry!” I cried as he stood up shaking my lunch off of him.
“Its fine, don’t worry about it.” He responded kindly. I felt the cafeteria grow quiet as everyone stared at us.
“Oh god, I feel like an idiot I’m so sorry! Here let me help you.” I began dabbing at his jeans with my napkin. I felt laughter erupt around me and stopped dabbing, realising how weirdly sexual it looked.
“I’m so sorry.” I repeated feeling myself go bright red.
“Its seriously okay. It’s fine honestly.” He replied laughing to himself.
I slapped my hand to my forehead in embarrassment and picked up my lunch tray. I walked over to my table and felt myself sink into the seat.
“Oh my god.” I muttered. “How embarrassing was that?! Like honestly.” I cupped my head in my hands.
“It was pretty bad.” Madison replied picking at her salad.
“Mads!” Hannah tutted. “It really wasn’t that bad.” She said taking my hands in hers and giving them a squeeze.
Daisy erupted into a fit of giggles and I couldn’t help but join her along with Madison and Hannah. It was pretty bad.
“Who was he anyways? I’ve never seen him around here before.” I asked stealing some of Daisy’s chips.
“Oh thats that new kid! His name is Samuel Adams, but Sam for short. He’s just started here and got expelled from his last school so is a bit of a bad boy!” Madison replied.
“How do you always know all this stuff Mads?!” Daisy exclaimed.
“Because! People just tell me this stuff because I’m the gossip queen!” She said fanning herself with her napkin.
“Well Miss gossip queen would you mind if I had your apple? I’m starving and am way to embarrassed to go back over there and too lazy to go to my locker and get my own.” I pleaded.
“No way, you want your own apple, you go get it!” She responded taking a big chunk of apple out with her teeth.
“Ugh fine.” I said slumping off and out into the corridor.

The halls were eerily quiet and empty during lunch, the only noise to be heard was the echo of laughter and talking coming from the cafeteria.
As I rounded the corner to my locker I saw the new kid walking towards me dabbing at his jeans with a paper towel.
Oh no. Shit, turn around while you still can Soph!
“Oh hey.” He said once he spotted me.
“Hi.” I said as I punched in my locker combo.
“You’re not going to spill anything else on me are you?” He asked putting his hands up.
“No no no. I promise! I’m really sorry about that by the way.”
“Don’t even sweat it. I’ve had my fair share of lunches being spilled on me. Another one wasn’t going to do much damage.”
I smiled gently as I closed my locker, grabbing my apple from the shelf. He was kinda cute.
“You maybe wanna go sit outside or something?” He asked. “Like in the courtyard?”
The courtyard was off limits during lunch and recess...I felt his inner rebel coming out to play. Not wanting to let him down or seem like a loser that always played by the rules, I agreed.
“Uh yeah sure.”
As we walked he talked of his old school, Dalton Boys Grammar. He went to an all boys school with extremley strict staff and insanely smart students. I had heard of it here and there.
He never brought up being expelled until we sat down and continued the conversation.
“I was kicked out for doing drugs.” He said plainly.
“Oh no way.” I said acting like I didn’t care and didn’t know that he had been expelled.
“Yeah, I was pretty into all that stuff back then, but I’ve turned a new leaf and I think this school is really going to help me with all that. I don’t want to be known as the ‘crackhead’ anymore. You know?”
“Yeah I guess I do.” Even though I didn’t.
“It wasn’t just marijuana that I was into. It was like cocaine as well. It was pretty bad, messed me up.” He replied looking down at his shoes.
“I’m sorry to hear that.” I said placing my hand on his knee.
“You’re sweet.” He responded looking up at me. His eyes glistened in the sunlight. I tried to catch my breath as he placed his hand on my leg. Things grew awfully quiet as he edged himself closer to me. Our silence was interrupted by a voice I knew all too well.
“What do you two think you’re doing out here?” Harry was standing in the door way, hands on hips, an unimpressed expression planted on his face.
Before I had the chance to feel awkward that Harry was closer to me than he had been in weeks, Sam jumped up.
“Haz?!” Sam exclaimed.
“Sam?!” Harry cried back. “Is that you?!”
“Of course its me brother, give me some love!” Sam yelled as they embraced each other in a friendly hug.
“What on earth are you doing here?!” Harry asked slapping him on the back.
“I moved here! I go to this school now! What on earth are you doing here?!”
“I teach here!”
“Get out this is crazy. I can’t believe mum didn’t tell me you were teaching here!” Sam cried.
“Oh Aunty Emm.” Harry said laughing and scratching his jaw.
Wait.
Aunty Emm?
That could only mean one thing...
“It’s good to see you again man. I’ve honestly missed my good old cousin.” Sam said punching Harry in the arm.
They were cousins.