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It's Simple.

,

I remember us together with a promise of forever
We can do this, fight the pressure
Please remember December


Demi Lovato- Remeber December



[Jamie's P.O.V.]

Monday... January 28th.

Okay... I can do this...

"Jamie!"


Nevermind...


"It's been weeks!"

"Don't care."

"But Jamie–"

"Just tell him I'm busy."

"Jamie... He knows you talk to the others–"

"Who are we talking about?"

"Just give me something!"

"Don't know him."

"He knows you don't wanna talk–"

"Lie then!" I snapped at Julie.


I saw her shrink back in fear... And I knew I had finally cracked.



Fuck.



"Wait... Julie... I'm just..." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.

"It's fine. I'll just make something up." She smiled faintly and went back to working on her photos.

It's been like this for a while now;

  • Niall and Julie talk.
  • Harry, Louis, Liam, or Zayn and I talk.
  • I get brought up.
  • Niall gets brought up.
  • Niall asks about me.
  • I pretend like he doesn't exist.
  • Then everyone tries to get us to talk again.
He's my best friends boyfriend. I don't need any drama. Especially since word has been getting leaked about the two. What if I get brought into that and it explodes into some love triangle? Then Harry gets added in? Nope. No. Don't want that... Squares are too complicated.


Okay. That was obviously a lie. Julie never cared if I talked once in a while to her boyfriends.

She trusts me.

I'm heart broken. Simple as that. Hell, people have said I've even changed a bit since break. And Ryan and Sofie obviously didn't like this whole Julie and Niall thing, but, it's fine.


If Niall is happy... I'm happy...



I guess...



'Then why are you avoiding him?'

Because I don't want drama.

'When has drama ever stopped you?'

Always... Sometimes... Never...

'Just talk to him!'

No.

"I hate this..."


~


"James. Really? You're acting like a real high school girl NOW? It's the year 2013, and you decided on now?! I mean... I get it. I'm pretty pissed at Niall myself, but, the guy just wants to talk to you. It's been weeks–"

"Don't tell me you're taking their side too Mark."

"I'm not picking sides! I'm just..." Mark stopped and ran a hand through his hair.

I just spun from side to side on my chair as I scrolled through tumblr on a separate screen from our video chat.

"It's times like these where I wish you were a guy."

I rolled my eyes and chuckled lightly.

"I'll talk to him eventually."

"After another couple of weeks? James. It's almost February."

"What's your point?"

"James!"

"Look," I turned to Mark as he gave me a hard look.
"I'm not comfortable talking to him right now. After what went down during our trip; No way. I'm not trying to act like I'm buddy-buddy with him when I know I'm not feeling it. It'll just seem a bit sketchy. And then the girls; they're mad at me too! Why? I don't know! There's so much drama involved with them and I don't like drama at all! You should know this!" I sighed and went back to Tumblring.


There was a small moment of silence between us before Mark finally sighed.

"I've been talking to Louis-"

"Ugh."

"Wait! Let me finish!" I rolled my eyes softly and turned to Mark.
"He told me everything. He got everything out of Harry and Niall, and, I know why you're acting like this–"

"Mark!"

"You're heartbroken."





Silence.





It was so strange to hear it out loud again. It was like a painful tug at my heart. And if that wasn't bad enough, all those memories started flooding back.

"I know you like Niall. Everyone knew."

"Except Niall..." I grumbled to myself.

"And I know Julie is your best friend or whatever. You're that type of person Jamie; the type to let others be happy, help them be happy, let them take a piece of your happiness even if it means you're the one to bear the burden of their hate or sadness. You think that by taking their burdens, letting them have what you want, you'll be happy and everything will be great. You've ALWAYS been that type of person. That's not right though..."

"I'm fine. I shouldn't even be complaining... I didn't even get it that bad... It was a stupid crush... Harry... He..." Another tug.


And a small tear.


"You see how he is? He's STILL happy. He doesn't let my stupidity, me breaking his heart, the hurt I've put upon him, bring him down! He still talks to me... He still acts the same way he did when we first met. And I'm here depressed because I let my best friend go out with a guy I liked?! I SHOULDN'T be like this! I mean, I basically CAUSED this! But I can't face Niall. I just can't! I don't know... Thinking about him hurts me, Mark... It hurts!"

"Jamie... Relax. Wipe off those tears..." Mark looked down at his hands.

I didn't even realize I was crying.

"S-sorry... I didn't... I didn't notice." I wiped them off quickly.

"You can't let this get in your way." Mark looked up to me with a serious face.
"Talk to him. He honestly sounds desperate from what I hear, and from when he texted me."

"So I've heard." I sighed and looked off to my wall.


The picture I took of him still hung there... Sweet innocent memories emerging once more. The small talks, the laughs, the smiles, those simple gestures we exchanged and shared were all still as clear as day.

"I'll see." I sighed and turned to smile at Mark.


He smiled back and shot me a thumbs up.


"Good... Now... How's mom and dad?"


~


"JAMIIEEE!"

I looked up from my locker and looked down the hall.

"Who called me?"

"OTHER SIDE!"

I turned again and grinned like crazy as I ran towards this loco dude.

"RYAN!"

"Jamie!"

"Dude! I missed you! We were supposed to hang out during the weekend!"

"It's my fucking job. You know I would've rather hung out with you. You're the best. I love you dude." He smiled and kissed the top of my head.




"Are you gay or something?"




"You know what? Fuck you bitch."

Ahhh Ryan. How I've missed you.

"Dude... We have to catch up! Last time we hung out was... Like... A week ago!" I smiled as I closed my locker and walked along with him.

"We do. From what I've heard; there's still drama with you and popstar Niall-"

"Not now Ryan. I've already gotten a lecture from Mark." I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"You never know. There's got to be a reason behind him acting that way. Talk to him and dig into that shit."

"He's Julie's boyfriend–"

"Huh?"

"He's Julie's–"

"Excuse me?"

"Ryan!" I smacked his arm playfully when I finally caught up to his little game.


He really doesn't approve of them. Hell, he's even told her personally and it apparently didn't go smoothly.


"He was like... A close friend of yours. Sure he's famous and probably won't have time for you and might forget you cause he's too busy making–"

"What's your point?"

"He has so much laid upon him, yet, he's still trying to talk to you. Doesn't that alone help you– I don't know– see how much he really cared?"



Wow. I never really thought about it that way...


"Anyways, let's get to class. I got a shit load to learn and I really just wanna go home and sleep." He sighed and pulled me along.


"Oh you baby."


~


He has so much laid upon him, yet, he's still trying to talk to you.


God dammit Ryan.


Ever since he pointed that out, I've been in bed all day with my phone in hand, hovering over Niall's name.

"Maybe it isn't a good idea..." I set my phone down and stared at it.
"But maybe I've waited too long..." I picked it back up again.
"Okay... Big breaths... Scroll to Niall... And... Touch... Select text... Okay! Great!" I smiled to myself as I saw my keyboard pop up, ready for me to type a message.



And then I blanked out.



"Maybe I'll try again tomorrow..." I mumbled and set my phone aside once more.
"But..." I played with my fingers as I looked at my screen.
"Okay... I can do this..."


"Jamie?"


"Mom!" I jumped a bit when I saw her leaning against the door frame with a smile on her lips.

"What have you been doing?" She chuckled and walked over to sit next to me.

"Uhh... How much did you hear?" I mumbled nervously.

"Oh, just about enough." She grinned and picked my phone up.
"Niall... Hmm... That's that nice Irish boy you brought over so many times. Esta bien guapo." [He's really handsome.]

"Mom!" I laughed and nudged her.

"Now, why are you debating wether or not to text him?"


My mom knows when I lie.


Everyone does.

There's no point in making up an excuse if I know it's not gonna take me anywhere. This is why my mom and I are so close; I always tell her the truth.

"You remember when I went to the camping trip?"

"Yeah... Like a couple weeks ago?"

"About two or three, yeah. But who's counting?" I cleared my throat.

"I remember you looked so sad." She sighed and set my phone off to the side.
"Your father told me not to pester you because you were having girl problems, but, that just encouraged me even more." She smiled and kissed my forehead.
"Now, que pasa?" [What's wrong?]


I sighed lightly and looked at my wall of Polaroids. I've been doing that often...


"What do you do when... The guy you like... Likes someone else? And it's your fault he doesn't like you... And his friend likes you too but you don't see him that way... And then you feel bad because he's really sweet and deserves someone better than me...Cause I broke his heart. And now Julie has Niall and I'm all depressed when i shouldn't be cause nothing horrible happened and I'm so stupid–"

"Mija, calm down." My mom chuckled, stopping me from rambling on.
"What I understood was; you like Niall, Niall likes Julie, Harry likes you, Julie ended up with Niall, and you broke Harry's heart. Close enough?"

"Exactly what I meant." I mumbled as I flopped faced forward.

"And what's wrong? Are you and Julie fighting?"

"No! Yo no me peleare sobre un niño. No soy una pendeja." [No! I would never fight over a boy. I'm not an idiot.] I answered back with a chuckle as I looked up to her.

"I didn't say that." She laughed and flopped besides me.
"Then what's the problem?"

I took in a deep breath and began telling her my story. I started with me realizing I liked Niall, everyone teasing me, Harry telling me he liked me, me freaking out, the camping trip, the kiss, and then all the craziness that is my hormonal teenage self.

"Wow... Sounds like some crazy television show." She said with a surprised expression.

"Now I don't know what to do. Everyone's been telling me that Niall wants to talk to me, but, I feel weird. I don't want him to know how I feel about him and I don't want to let those feelings come out. That'd be weird since he's Julie's boyfriend." I sighed and flipped to my back.

"I'd say talk to him. He was your friend, he still wants to be your friend, and Julie is your best friend. She knew about your crush and I'm sure she wouldn't want to do anything to hurt you, would she?"

"I guess you're right... But I don't know what to say! Like; 'Hey Niall! Sorry for being a pendeja and not texting you cause I liked you and you crushed me!'?" I turned to my mom and saw her holding a laugh in.
"Mom!"

"Sorry! I find it kind of funny really. You're never like this Jamie. You're always... Independent and sure about yourself. You must've really liked this guy."

"Mom!" I groaned and rolled off my bed and onto the floor.

"Oh! Calm down... I love you mija! Just send him a text with an apology or a joke. Something that sounds like Jamie." She smiled down to me from my bed.

"That's sounds hard."

"It's simple! Just be yourself baby. You're just making it hard on yourself by hiding behind that mask you started wearing... If that makes sense." She chuckled and reached down to tuck a hair behind my ear.

"I guess it makes sense..." I smiled up to her.
"Thanks Mami."

"No problem baby."

"Okay, of you two are done, I'm getting hungry!"


I jumped at the sound of my dads voice by my door.


"Dad! How long have you been there?!"

"Long enough blondie. Let's go eat!"

Oh great... Now my dad knows... And he's still calling me blondie.

"I'm dying my hair again."

"Just not pink again. You looked like that Nicki woman."

"Dad!"

I laughed and followed them out. I couldn't help but look at the ring on my finger.


'I wonder if he still wears it...'




[Niall's P.O.V.]

"Anything?"

"I've tried my best. She isn't budging." Julie sighed as she ran a hand through her hair.
"I'm sorry... I really am trying my best–"

"You've done enough. Thanks. I shouldn't even be asking you for this. It sounds so wrong, especially since we're together–"

"Don't sweat it Niall."

I looked up to her and saw her smile.

"You two are friends. I don't want you two thinking you can't talk or hang out cause we're together. That's wrong in my opinion. I'm thankful towards her that I was able to meet a guy like you." She winked and looked down chuckling.


I couldn't help but smile a bit.


Even though I didn't know Julie as well as Jamie, she's really a genuine person. I could imagine myself being with her in public, not caring about others opinions.

But...

Jamie.

I'm such an idiot. Ever since Louis told me Ryan was gay and Julie confirmed it... I've been wondering what could've happened on that trip. I wonder if maybe... If maybe Jamie would've been with me.

'God! Why did I fuck up?'


"Niall?" I looked to the screen and saw Julie yawning.

"Oh god! It's late over there! Go to bed!" I laughed at her slowly falling asleep.

"Why are you up so early anyways? It's like... What? Five? Almost six in London?" She mumbled and reached for her phone.

"Yeah... We're leaving the hotel in a bit. We've got stuff to do before the tour." I chuckled and tousled my hair a bit as I stretched.

"Oh my god! Your tour! craziness... I'm buying a ticket. But... Alright... I'm going to bed. I've got school tomorrow." She smiled and scratched her cheek.

"Alright, goodnight."

"Goodnight Niall."

And with a final kiss goodbye, we hung up.

"Ughh..."


What would've happened if I had just listened? If I didn't go through her phone? If I would've just..

"I've gotta stop." I groaned and ran my hands down my face.

"You awake?"

I turned to the door and saw Liam peeking in. He looked pretty awake already.

"No. I'm still sleeping."

"That's not what I meant." He laughed and walked in further to my room.
"You awake enough to go and get some breakfast with me?"

"Sure! Just give me a second."

After I got myself dressed up, Liam and I walked down to a small pancake house. Of course, paparazzi followed us the whole way. Ever since word got leaked about Julie and I, it's been as hectic as ever.

"Don't they get tired? It's too early for this." Liam chuckled as he looked out the window.

"Who knows. I don't care right now. I'm just hungry." I mumbled as I stuffed my face.


'This is amazing.'


"Have you gotten any word from Jamie?"

I stopped momentarily before eating again.

"Nah. Julie tried convincing her to talk to me, but, she won't budge. I really fucked up." I sighed and put my fork down.
"I feel so guilty for what I did." I looked down at the ring on my finger and smiled to myself.


'I wonder if she still wears it...'


"It's okay mate. I'm sure she'll come through soon."

"Enough about me though. How's Sofie?"

"Let's get going!"

"Aww c'mon! I know you like her!"

~

"It's almost Harry's birthday!" Louis chirped as he walked into the home theater.

"Don't even remind me." Harry chuckled as he reached for the popcorn.

"What do you want to do?" I asked him with a wiggle of my brows.


Yes. Harry and I are okay now. It was weird at first, but, we got over it. He still has hope that Jamie might like him back, but, he still talks about how much she cares for me.


He really doesn't make my relationship with Julie any easier.


"Who knows... I'll see."

"Don't go to crazy though." Zayn chuckled.

"Remember last year?!" Liam bursted into laughter.

They all continued to throw in ideas, laughing, and reminiscing over old times.
I just watched how happy they were.


They're happy with their life, their career, their families, and their love life.



Am I happy?


I do love my life, my career, my family... But... My love life. Is it really where I want it to be?

"Niall!"

"Huh?!" I jumped a bit when Louis spoke in my ear.


I didn't even notice the guys were already watching the movie.

"Your phone keeps buzzing!" He chuckled and laid back down on the sofa.

"Damn phone..."

Just some texts from friends.

"What's up? Hey... How's it going? When's the concert? Dude dont tell anyone, but, I met this cool chick." I chuckled at Mark's text.

Then I got another one...

"What in the..."

My breathing stopped.

"Are you okay Niall?" Harry and the others turned to me with a worried face.


I smiled.


"Mark just sent me a photoshopped picture of Harry's face on Beyonce's body!" I bursted into laughter and dropped my phone.

I'm guessing the lads grabbed it and saw it by the way they bursted laughing as well.


"Why is he always doing that?! I'm telling Jamie!"


~















































































































From: Jamie
Do you still wear your ring?
























































"Am I dreaming?"

Notes

Oh my god! A RARE update! lol.

I've been too busy guys. I'm really sorry about making y'all wait for what? Months? I've just got too much to do! Work, Sports, School, and blah blah. I felt so stressed out man. Luckily, everything is starting to settle down. I honestly felt like not writing here anymore because of the lack of time i had! But look! I didnt :D!


About updates:
I'm not sure when I'll update, but, I swear i wont make you wait months again lol. I got this guys! Thanks for the support and for sticking by me even when I wasn't around lol.

Anyways; Jamie. Niall. Julie. Harry. Ryan.... Oh the list goes on and on! What do you guys think will happen now that Jamie finally texted back? Will shit go down? Will Julie do something? What color should Jamie dye her hair next?! Did you like my little cellphone gif?! I couldnt find any!!! lol


Girls and their hormones.

Comment below! Love you guys!cx

Comments

literally dying for an update

Leeya'Love Leeya'Love
11/6/14

Your such an amazing writer! I can't wait for the next update!

im_a_nialler im_a_nialler
4/16/14

ahhhh i love this!!

OMG you update yay!!!!

@Cucumber
I know!! I'm so bad!Dx