The Mess We're In

To say I was furious would be a serious understatement.

I was livid.

How dare Harry accuse me of cheating on him?

I could barely see straight as I exited the hotel a few hours after the whole thing had happened.
Even with the time alone in my room, I had yet to tame the anger boiling just under the surface.

Of all the things Harry could have said to me, that was the one thing that he should know I would never do to him.

I was so mad, in fact I had completely forgotten that I was currently being stalked by some psycho, or at least I didn't notice until I was a good distance away from the hotel and relative safety.

It wasn't until I was standing in the middle of the street unsure of where my anger fueled walk had led me.

Immediately panic set in as I looked from one unfamiliar face to another. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and unwanted tears welling in my eyes.

And suddenly I was angry again. Angry at myself for letting someone cause me to fear something I had once been okay with. Angry that I felt alone, angry that I was shutting people out because of the fear.

Angry that I was shutting Harry out and leading him to not trust me.

Closing my eyes tightly and clenching my fist at my sides, I took several deep breaths, waiting for my heart rate to slow to normal before opening my eyes again.

Logically, I knew no one was looking at me, or at least that's what I was telling myself, but in my angry, scared mind everyone's eyes were on me and I suddenly just wanted to be back in the room I had fled not so long ago. If I were completely honest with myself, I really just wanted to be in that room snuggled next to Harry so I knew I was safe and that we were okay, even if I was slightly irked by him.

Deciding I was too over whelmed out in the open like this I spun on my heel and walked back the way I came.

I made it about a block before a familiar face caught my eye from across the street.

"Shane?!" I had to admit I was a bit startled to see him and judging by the look on his face he was a bit startled to see me.

Looking around, then back at me, Shane walked across the empty street and right up to me with a shy smile and hands in his pockets.

"Hey Dawn."

I furrowed my brow. "What are you doing out here?"

He looked across the street then back at me before shrugging. "Coffee run."

Spotting the familiar Starbucks sign, I nodded.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

It was possibly the most awkward conversation I had ever been involved in with the blonde.
"Would you like to join me?" He asked inclining his head towards the shop.

Instantly Harry flashed in my mind. I knew he wouldn't like it if I did and as angry as I was at him, I would never intentionally do anything to upset him. "I probably shouldn't."

Shane stared at me with a serious look on his face before clenching his jaw and looking away.
"Harry."

It wasn't a question but I answered anyway. "Yea. I wouldn't want to make him angry."

"From what I saw this morning, you two didn't look too happy with each other."

The tone he used kind of set my nerves on edge, like he was struggling to keep his anger in check.

"Even still, he's my boyfriend and he's made it pretty clear how he feels about this." I said pointing at the two of us.

Now clenched fist were added to his already intimidating stance, I subtly backed away from him slightly unsure of why I was suddenly frightened by him.

"Yea he has, hasn't he?" Shane spit out, still not looking at me.

My mind was trying to determine if I could out run him if I had to make a break for it when he abruptly flashed his blazing eyes at me freezing me in my spot. It was a slightly crazed look that disappeared almost as quickly as it appeared leaving me to wonder if I had even seen it at all or if it was just my overly paranoid brain making things up.

"You know what? It's okay Dawn. No worries." He forced a smile onto his lips and although I knew what he was aiming for was a comforting look, it came off kind of sinister. "I'll catch you around later."

I nodded dumbly still not able to find my voice as I watched him back away from me.

When he was out of sight I released the breath I hadn't been aware I was holding before spinning on my heel once more and walking as quickly as I could back to the hotel and, more importantly, back to Harry.

As soon as I was in the familiar elevator I felt a wave of relief wash over me. At least here I knew of five people who would sooth my frayed nerves.

"Dawn?"

I had been so caught up, slouched against the cool wall with my eyes shut tightly, that I hadn't realized the doors had opened onto my floor.

Now I was faced with a worried looking Zayn.

Zyan was always able to read me pretty well, only rivaled by Harry's ability to read me.

"Hey." I answered trying my best to hide the fact that I was slightly freaked out by my last interaction with a human.

His eyes narrowed at me and I knew I had failed.

"What's wrong?"

I bit my lip and pushed off the wall before walking past him only answering when my back was to him so he couldn't see me face.

"Nothing."

"You're lying, and not very well might I add." He said from directly behind me. I figured he would follow me.

"Is Harry here?" I asked pointing at my door with my back still to him.

He didn't answer instead he circled around until he was facing me, his eyes scrutinizing my face.

"You look petrified. What happened?" the concern was evident in his voice.

I knew he wasn't going to let it go, and honestly I really needed the company and the sounding board anyway.

I looked behind us to see if anyone was around before slipping past Zayn once more and opening the door, beckoning him to follow.

Once I was sure the door was closed and Harry was, in fact, not in the room I dropped myself onto the edge of the bed placing my hands over my face.

I could feel Zayn's eyes on me the whole time as I gathered my thoughts.

"Dee? You're scaring me a bit."

I sighed and dropped my hands to my lap before looking up at him. "You have to promise me you won't tell Harry."

Zayn's eyes widened and I could tell he didn't like the idea of keeping something from his friend but I also knew he wouldn't say anything if I didn't want him to.

"Dee what is going on? "

"I, um, I went for a walk today because Harry kind of pissed me off this morning. On the walk I kind of... well it's not important. What is important is I started to walk back and ran into Shane-"

"Shane?"

I could almost read the thought going through his head from here.

"It was a complete accident Zayn. Anyway, he asked me if I wanted to go to coffee with him and I said no because I knew Harry wouldn't like it and then it was like something... I don't know, he just became some creepy scary guy all of a sudden and all I wanted to do was run from him. It was so weird and with the way things have been going I was more than a little freaked out by i-"

"What do you mean ‘by the way things have been going'?"

Damn. I hadn't meant to say that. Think, think, how can you get out of this?

I couldn't exactly tell Zayn that I had been receiving creepy letters.

"Um... just with Harry and I. I've been on edge a lot and being on tour isn't helping." I lied.
Zayn either bought it or choose to ignore the deception. My vote is on the first because Zayn would never ignore anything.

"Well if you want me to be completely honest with you Dee, I don't really like that Shane guy. He gives off bad vibes." He said taking a seat next to me on the bed. "And I really don't like the way he looks at you. I know you know it bothers Harry but the rest of us aren't too keen on it either."

I let that sink in. I hadn't really realized Shane gave off bad vibes until just recently but if the people I trusted the most had noticed maybe it was something I should take into account.

I looked at Zayn from the corner of my eye and gave him a small smile which he returned. I leaned into his side and placed my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around me in a one armed hug.

"That's not all, is it?" He asked after a short period of silence.

I bit my lip before answering him with a softly spoken ‘no'.

"You don't want to talk about it do you?" He asked again. I loved that he knew me so well.

Zayn rarely pushed me to talk if I didn't want to but he always listened when I needed him to.

"Not really."

"Ok." He said as he placed a kiss on the top of my head. "Just... whatever it is, don't let it tear you and Harry apart. Talk to him."

I pulled away from him to look into his compassionate dark eyes and smiled. "I will. You're a good friend Zayn."

"I know." He chuckled before letting me go and standing up. "I'm going to go now. Are you going to be alright?"

I nodded.

"Alright. See you later Dawn."

I stayed in my spot until he was gone but as soon as I heard the door close I was up and pacing.

The thoughts flashing through my mind where confusing and frightening all at once. I couldn't help but wonder if Shane had anything to do with the letters.

That thought scared me quite a bit.

He was always around but how had he gotten the pictures. As far as I knew he was occupied at the time they were taken.

I didn't want to believe that someone I had spoken to on a simi regular basis and who seemed like a normal person, at least until recently, would be the one secretly terrorizing me.

I just couldn't process that as a legitimate conclusion. I refused to. It couldn't be him because I would know, right? I would have noticed it before. Besides it just didn't add up. I knew for a fact he was still in the arena the night the first picture was taken and he certainly couldn't be two places at once.

All afternoon I paced debating back and forth with myself.

Finally, when my body had reached a point of exhaustion I couldn't ignore anymore, I crawled into bed. I hadn't really been able to sleep last night with the argument I had with Harry on my mind and the lack of his body snuggled close to me.

As I let my eyes drift close I had settled with the conclusion that it couldn't have been Shane and the fact that he had creeped me out a little today had sent my overwhelmed mind into over drive.

I was just on the brink of sleep when I heard the door to the room open once more and a body slid into bed with me. I felt lips press to my shoulder and a familiar husk voice in my ear.

"I'm sorry." I could just make out through the foggy haze of sleep and it was enough to make the tension in my body relax and a smile slid across my lips.

Notes