After making a quick call to Paul to arrange for someone to pick up my luggage, I practically ran to the parking lot.

I scanned the busses looking for the one I desperately needed at the moment and sighing in contentment when I found it all the way in the back.

I smiled at the driver who was casually leaning against the glossy tan siding waiting for people to begin to appear and load up.

As I climbed the steps I was a bit surprised to see someone already seated in the front lounge typing away on a cell phone. As soon as the boy saw me he smiled.

“Well, fancy seeing you here. I haven’t really seen much of your face on this tour with you always hanging around that Cameron guy or Harry.”

I smiled weakly at him and dropped down in the seat beside him. “Shut up Josh, you see me plenty.”

He chuckled and looked at me funny. “Any particular reason you choose to grace us with your presence today.”

“Do you think I can stow away on here for today?”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “Why would you want to do that?”

I sighed. “Jena’s on my bus and I don’t really want to see her, I’m not really in the mood to see Harry either so the boys bus is a no go and Cameron isn’t exactly speaking to me at the moment so I can’t go there.” I turned my pleading eyes to him. “Please Josh. I promise I wont be a bother.”

“Of course you can stay here.” He laughed and pulled me into a side hug. His face looked down on my seriously. “You know I’m here to talk if you have to also.”

“I know. Right now I just need some peace and quite to think.”

“You’ve got it love.”

“Thank you.” I smiled happily and jumped up from the seat fully intending to nap in the back room. “Oh and Josh?”

He looked up at me in question.

“Please don’t tell the boys I’m here.”

He made the motion of zipping his lips and smiled widely which I returned and then ran off to the back.

I pretty much took the word crash quite literally as I drop myself into the sofa in the back lounge, slinging my arm over my face to block out the light and let my thoughts free.

I couldn’t believe Harry would go so far as to tell me he loved me just to get me to stay.

Didn’t he understand I needed to be free of him? I needed to be away from constantly seeing him and knowing that he didn’t want me the way I want him? That I certainly didn’t need or want him to pretend?

I’m not going to lie, for a split second, after he said that he loved me, I actually let me heart believe it and I felt like it was going to explode in my chest.

Then I realized what he was doing and I just felt dead inside.

I felt a shift in the bus and assumed it was the rest of the band loading up as I glanced down at my watch to find that it was nearing time to leave.

I knew Josh would tell them I needed space so I wasn’t too worried about any of them coming to talk to me.

Imagine my surprise when the door to the back did in fact open but not to Sandy or Jon or Dan.

No instead the faces of Eleanor and Danielle stared back at me.

In truth, besides the boys, these two girls were my only real friends back home.

From the start I had immersed myself in the world of One Direction and as appealing as it sounded, it didn’t leave much time or energy to go out into the world and make normal friends. So my life tended to revolve around those boys and the people in their circle.

One of the reasons moving back to the states seemed so appealing.

I eyed them up and down, neither saying a word as the both walked into the small space and took seats on either side of me.

I tossed me head back and shouted up to the front.

“THANKS A LOT JOSH. I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYONE I WAS HERE?”

A few seconds later his head poked through the door sending me a lopsided grin. “You said not to tell the boys you were here, which I didn’t. You never said anything about the girls.” He ended by pointing to the two who smiled sweetly at me.

I grunted at them and threw my arm back over my face, choosing to ignore them. I honestly didn’t want to talk right now but if I knew these two girls at all I knew I didn’t really stand a chance.

“Sooo...” Danielle dragged on.

I slid my arm up to peek an eye out and glare at her.

She just sent me her sweet, innocent smile that didn’t fool me one bit.

“What do the both of you want? Why are you here?” It came out sounding a lot harsher then I meant and that made me feel bad.

With my one little peeking eyes I saw Danielle’s eyes widen and look over me to what I assumed was a matching expression on Eleanor’s face.

I turned my head to confirm just as the other girl cleared her throat.

“We wanted to see how you were. We saw Harry a bit ago and he looked a little upset so we wanted to see how you were doing.” Eleanor spoke.

I dropped my arms to my side in defeat and looked blankly ahead. “I’m fine. Just a little pissed off that my supposed best friend would lie to me but other then that I’m all good.” I ended with a saccharine sweet smile at the both of them.

Danielle sighed and slouched back into the seat. “Dee we all know Harry isn’t the brightest sometimes. I’m sure you two can work whatever it is out.”

I turned my body and full attention on the curly headed dancer. “Oh really. He crawls into my bed last night completely sloshed, my boyfriends finds us and Harry just sits there like a damn bump on a log the whole time, then he proceeds to tell me that I shouldn’t work it out with MY BOYFRIEND to which I tell him I have to because I plan on moving back here to get away from him, and do you know what happened next?”

I looked at Danielle expectantly before looking over my shoulder at Eleanor. “He goes and lies to me about being in fucking love with me to get me to stay. What the hell is that about?” I said throwing my arms up in the air.

Just the thought of it sent a rush of anger as well as pain through my body. Why would he think that was ok?

Both girls leaned forward and looked at each other before looking back at me.

“Dawn...”

“What?!”

I’ll admit I was a little on edge and snapping unnecessarily.

“Harry wasn’t lying to you.” Eleanor's soft voice spoke from behind me. I slowly turned to look at her.

“What are you even talking about?”

“Dawn for as long as we’ve known Harry, he’s been in love with you.” Danielle filled in.

I knitted my eyebrows together. “Did Harry send you two?”

I wouldn’t put it past him to beg the girls to come and convince me that he was being truthful just to get me to stay.

“Goodness, you really are daft, aren’t you?” Eleanor said in exasperation. “Dawn, Harry is in love with you, he has been since you two started your reign of terror on the X-factor.”

I froze.

I really wanted to believe them but my mind kept telling me that Harry wouldn’t have kept that from me, we never lied to each other. Then I realized that if he had been keeping this from me since we met then I suppose I didn’t know him as well as I thought and it was possible that this was the truth.

As I looked from one face to the other I knew that they weren’t lying. Their expressions were to open, too pleading to be accompanied by lies.

I found myself believing them.

I should have been overjoyed, ecstatic really, but all I could find myself feeling was betrayed and angry.

He lied to me. For a very long time.

“Dawn?” Danielle asked looking at my face as I processed their words.

“Did he tell you that?” I had to ask. I needed to know if it was just me he lied to or if it was something he did with everyone around me.

“Eventually. Louis kind of figured it out and I over heard them talking about it once. He swore me to secrecy.” Eleanor confessed. I nodded and looked at Danielle.

“Liam told me.” She added.

So everyone knew except for me. I didn’t know weather to be angry at them or myself for being so damn stupid.

I really just felt humiliated that they all knew and silently watched as I struggled with how I felt and thinking Harry didn’t feel the same while the whole time they knew. They knew he was lying to me and I was stupid enough to believe him.

I stood up then with a deathly calm look on my face. I really had no more energy left to argue anymore.

“Dawn?” Eleanor asked that time as I began to leave. “Where are you going?”

“To see if I know anyone who doesn’t lie to me.”

I made it about half way through the bus before I felt one of them grab onto my hand.

I turned my head to glare at Danielle who looked at me pleadingly. “I am so sorry Dawn. We both are. But you have to understand it wasn’t our secret to tell.”

I softened at her words. She was right, it wasn’t her fault or Eleanor’s or anyone else's for that matter. Harry was the one who lied to me.

It didn’t stop the feeling of betrayal.

I yanked my hand from hers and sighed. “I understand that. It doesn’t make me feel better though. Right now, I just... I need to be away from everyone before I say or do something I’ll regret.”

She nodded and from behind her I saw Eleanor give me an understanding look.

“Okay. But I do have one more question for you.” Danielle pressed on.

I widened my eyes to prompt her to continue.

“Are you really leaving?” She sounded so sad by the idea and I probably should have thought my answer through a little better but my mind was full of angry, hurt, and confused thoughts.

“Oh, I’m still leaving. My decision seems much more valid now that I know what's really going on here.”

Both girls just stared at me, mouths hung open. I felt a little bad but vindicated at the same time.

I didn’t give them time to say anything else as I continued through the bus.

I had never been so thankful to a schedule running late before as I was at that moment.

I rushed past the band that had kindly left the back free to the three of us as we chatted and straight down the steps.

My head flew around the parking lot as the crew was finishing the last minute loading.

I spotted the bus I was looking for knowing that at that moment I probably shouldn’t even consider going on it. Chances were, in my current mood, things would either end terrible or... it just didn’t look good.

But I needed to do something.

Making a mad dash across the lot I tapped on the door just as the driver started up the engine.

I managed a very small grateful smile at him as I ran up the steps and into the front lounge of the bus.

All eyes landed on me as I panted, frowning in front of them.

I let my eyes drift until they landed on the familiar curls. His eyes shot up to me looking sad and a bit confused at my presence.

I walked right up to where he sat, ignoring everyone else's staring eyes and looked down at him.

“We need to talk, right now.”

Notes

ugh oh.... enjoy. comments get another chapter