Finding Myself.
Letting him know.
Jake decided he’d stay for dinner, which was a good thing, because Jake talked a lot so there’d be no awkward silences, and also, I didn’t have to sit next to Harry. After dinner, Jake asked if he could use the home phone.
“Sure.” I say as I take it off the hook.
He quickly dials in a memorized number, and after afew seconds of silence, I hear a women’s voice on the other end.
“Hello?” It says.
“Mom it’s me.” Jake replied.
I hear the voice take a deep sigh of relief. “Where have you been Jake? I was worried sick!”
“Sorry mom, I had dinner at a friend’s place and I left my phone at home.”
“It’s okay. Just tell me earlier next time please.” It gushes, but continues, “So, how are you getting home?”
Jake darts his eyes at me, pleading.
I laugh and nod.
“My friend’s… um… mom is dropping me home.” He says finally.
“Alright, see you soon.” The voice says before hanging up.
“Clara’s not my mom..." I say, as soon as he puts the phone back on the hook.
He looks at me, confused.
“She’s my um…” I struggle for words.
“I’m her big sister!” Clara’s voice suddenly fills the air.
I turn to see her, leaning on the door frame. Just like Harry does…
Regardless of my Harry thoughts, I smile at her. “Yup, pretty much.” And I walk over and swing my arm around her.
“So where’s your mom?” He asks, smiling.
My grip on Clara tightens, and I can feel tears welling up behind my eyeballs. Clara senses it, but her words aren’t the words I wanted her to say. “Destiny’s mom passed away.”
Jake looks almost ashamed as he stares at the ground uncomfortably. “Oh shit. I’m sorry Destiny.”
He comes over and rubs my back. Clara somehow takes this as her cue to leave, smiles at me, and gently walks away.
“Jake… It’s okay.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?” He asks, and before I know it, he’s leading me over to the table.
We sit down on the same side of the table, but our chairs face each other.
“You know, even though we just met, I feel this.” He studies the table cloth, searching for the right word, “Connection” He pauses again, “Between us. But not like that. Like a friendship. A strong, honest friendship.”
I look up at him.
And with another word, he gently grips my hand. And I can’t help of thinking back to when I saw Harry and his sister hold hands, in this exact same spot.
“Destiny, my dad died a year ago.”
My eyes widen at the confession, but Jake continues.
“He worked at the bank, and was in an armed hold-up. But, being the strong-minded, pure man my father was, he refused to give away any of the hard-earned money people had made, and trusted him to keep safe. He got shot on the spot, and died instantly.”
I clutched Jake’s hand like it was my life-line.
I felt terrible for Jake, but did this mean I had to declare how my parent’s where killed too?
I looked at Jake, his eyes watery, but strong and loving. His grip on my hand warm and tight, but ever so trusting. His lips pale with pain, but smiling for me. How his hair flopped on his face, giving it a soft, round glow. This boy…. This boy is one of my own. One I can trust, one I can tell anything too. One of my best friends.
“My-my parents were killed a few weeks ago…” I begin. I choke a little on the next few words, willing them to come out. “They were murdered. But not on purpose. The subject of the murder was me.” And that’s how I started. That’s when I told Jake everything. About Niall being my brother, about my old town and how I have no idea where I am, about how I had counselling, but haven’t been yet. About Cassie. About Lacy. About Addison and the girls.
About Harry.
Throughout it all, tears ran down my cheeks. And at the end, I gush into Jake’s open arms and weep on his shoulder. He holds me close and I don’t hesitate when he pushed my hair out of my face. We stay like this for a while, until I pull away. I whip my tears on my sleeve.
And apologize to Jake for everything.
“Don’t. Don’t apologize. You’re the only one I’ve told about my father’s death.”
I feel a bridge of trust being sealed between us.
“Me too.” I utter.
Then, his words shock me, but make me feel cherished, blessed to have such a good friend.
“Be my life-line.”
To show I accept, I hug Jake tightly, but pull away sooner than he was expecting.
“We gotta get you home.” I smiled through my red eyes and pink cheeks.
We stand up, and I guide Jake to the door.
“CLARA!” I yell and she comes bounding in the room from the lounge-room quickly.
“Can we drop Jake home?”
Clara looks at us both, than laughs. “Give me an address and I’ll go there.”
“Sure.” I say as I take it off the hook.
He quickly dials in a memorized number, and after afew seconds of silence, I hear a women’s voice on the other end.
“Hello?” It says.
“Mom it’s me.” Jake replied.
I hear the voice take a deep sigh of relief. “Where have you been Jake? I was worried sick!”
“Sorry mom, I had dinner at a friend’s place and I left my phone at home.”
“It’s okay. Just tell me earlier next time please.” It gushes, but continues, “So, how are you getting home?”
Jake darts his eyes at me, pleading.
I laugh and nod.
“My friend’s… um… mom is dropping me home.” He says finally.
“Alright, see you soon.” The voice says before hanging up.
“Clara’s not my mom..." I say, as soon as he puts the phone back on the hook.
He looks at me, confused.
“She’s my um…” I struggle for words.
“I’m her big sister!” Clara’s voice suddenly fills the air.
I turn to see her, leaning on the door frame. Just like Harry does…
Regardless of my Harry thoughts, I smile at her. “Yup, pretty much.” And I walk over and swing my arm around her.
“So where’s your mom?” He asks, smiling.
My grip on Clara tightens, and I can feel tears welling up behind my eyeballs. Clara senses it, but her words aren’t the words I wanted her to say. “Destiny’s mom passed away.”
Jake looks almost ashamed as he stares at the ground uncomfortably. “Oh shit. I’m sorry Destiny.”
He comes over and rubs my back. Clara somehow takes this as her cue to leave, smiles at me, and gently walks away.
“Jake… It’s okay.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?” He asks, and before I know it, he’s leading me over to the table.
We sit down on the same side of the table, but our chairs face each other.
“You know, even though we just met, I feel this.” He studies the table cloth, searching for the right word, “Connection” He pauses again, “Between us. But not like that. Like a friendship. A strong, honest friendship.”
I look up at him.
And with another word, he gently grips my hand. And I can’t help of thinking back to when I saw Harry and his sister hold hands, in this exact same spot.
“Destiny, my dad died a year ago.”
My eyes widen at the confession, but Jake continues.
“He worked at the bank, and was in an armed hold-up. But, being the strong-minded, pure man my father was, he refused to give away any of the hard-earned money people had made, and trusted him to keep safe. He got shot on the spot, and died instantly.”
I clutched Jake’s hand like it was my life-line.
I felt terrible for Jake, but did this mean I had to declare how my parent’s where killed too?
I looked at Jake, his eyes watery, but strong and loving. His grip on my hand warm and tight, but ever so trusting. His lips pale with pain, but smiling for me. How his hair flopped on his face, giving it a soft, round glow. This boy…. This boy is one of my own. One I can trust, one I can tell anything too. One of my best friends.
“My-my parents were killed a few weeks ago…” I begin. I choke a little on the next few words, willing them to come out. “They were murdered. But not on purpose. The subject of the murder was me.” And that’s how I started. That’s when I told Jake everything. About Niall being my brother, about my old town and how I have no idea where I am, about how I had counselling, but haven’t been yet. About Cassie. About Lacy. About Addison and the girls.
About Harry.
Throughout it all, tears ran down my cheeks. And at the end, I gush into Jake’s open arms and weep on his shoulder. He holds me close and I don’t hesitate when he pushed my hair out of my face. We stay like this for a while, until I pull away. I whip my tears on my sleeve.
And apologize to Jake for everything.
“Don’t. Don’t apologize. You’re the only one I’ve told about my father’s death.”
I feel a bridge of trust being sealed between us.
“Me too.” I utter.
Then, his words shock me, but make me feel cherished, blessed to have such a good friend.
“Be my life-line.”
To show I accept, I hug Jake tightly, but pull away sooner than he was expecting.
“We gotta get you home.” I smiled through my red eyes and pink cheeks.
We stand up, and I guide Jake to the door.
“CLARA!” I yell and she comes bounding in the room from the lounge-room quickly.
“Can we drop Jake home?”
Clara looks at us both, than laughs. “Give me an address and I’ll go there.”
that was the last chapter of Finding Myself until the next book in the series ! :)
If you want to know what happens, you gotta wait for book 2 ! But don't worry, it'll be up soon xoxo
11/21/13