When You Let Your Heart Win
Within a short minute, we were in my bedroom, both of us shirtless, my legs still wrapped around him and the only time his mouth left mine is whenever our shirts were pulled off the other. To say I needed this, him, is a definite understatement. It honestly is the strangest thing whenever you’re not around the person you love more than anything. An hour without them feels like a decade and it just baffles me that we went so long without each other, in every single way, while at the same time being able to function, in a way, and not be in the same town.
The second he placed me on my bed and pulled back and looked at me, I swear my heart could just burst with happiness. After everything we’ve been through since the second we kissed so many months ago, it’s crazy how much I love him and how much I want and need him in my life. It’s hard to explain what he really means to me, other than saying the same thing over and over again; he’s my world.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He whispered pushing my hair back from my face and kept his hand in my hair. “Like you’re parents could come home at any giving second.”
“Then shut the door.” I smiled.
“If we get caught, they’ll pummel me.” He laughed leaning down to kiss me once more before moving his hands to my ankles and unhooked them from around him and got up to shut the door.
“If they do, I’ll ‘pummel’ them back.” I smiled getting up and scooting back a little so I could get to my knees and watch him as he moved.
"How long ago did they say they were going to the movies?" He asked walking back to me, placed his hands on my waist and pulled me into him.
"I don't know." I shrugged wrapping my arms around him. "I think they're staying out so we'd be forced to talk."
"Remind me to thank them if that's the case." He smiled and slid his hands down to my bum. "You swear you want to do this?"
"I swear." I nodded pushing myself closer to him.
"I know you haven't been drinking, but if you wake up later and see me in your bed, naked and you throw me out, I'm leaving." He warned and my eyes went wide. "Not leaving you. Just… damnit, that came out wrong." He sighed and shook his head. "That sounded way better in my head. Forget I said that."
"Am I making you nervous?" I smiled grabbing onto his shoulders and practically threw him on the bed and straddled his waist.
"It feels like I'm about to lose my virginity." He laughed and I sat up and made a face. "What?"
"So you're basically thinking of Hannah? Right now?"
"No." He scrunched his eyebrows together.
"How many people have you slept with then?" I slumped. "I thought it was only three."
"It is three." He laughed.
"The brain of Teddy Parker is over thinking the slightest things." He smile sitting up, his hands automatically unclasping my bra, all awhile he looked me in the eyes. "Again." He whispered close to my face, then looked down and kissed my shoulders, moving my, now loose, bra straps down my shoulder before repeating on the other side.
"I'm sorry." I sighed wrapping my arms around his neck and gripped the back of his hair and pulled his head back so I could kiss him.
"It's okay." He whispered after a short kiss, but stayed just as close. "I love you." His smile so genuine, it made my heart beat harder.
"Good." I smiled and kissed him again, all before pushing him back against the mattress. "Don't even think about sitting back up." I warned whenever he lifted up on his elbows, just to sigh and reach up for a pillow and fall back down with his hands behind his head as I discarded the remainder of my bra. "Do you have anything?" I asked leaning up slightly and scraped my nails down from his shoulders to his stomach and felt him shake from the light pressure.
"No." He shook his head. "From the way you talked on the phone last night, this wasn't in store."
"Oh." I nodded stopping my movements and slowly felt a smile form on my face.
"What?" He smiled moving a hand from behind his head and grabbed one of my hands as they laid on his stomach.
"Nothing." I shook my head. "It's just nice to know you didn't want to come off as a twat for having condoms stashed in his pockets."
"I never carry condoms in my pocket." He laughed. "I usually have one in my wallet, but we used that and I never threw another in after we started... trying." He stopped momentarily after he realised what he was saying. "Sorry."
"It's okay." I shook my head.
"Do you know why they said what they said?" He asked throwing different words out so he wasn't mentioning it.
"They said I'll have to go through a series of tests." I shrugged. "If they saw what they think they saw, I can get pregnant, but I can't carry the baby to the six week mark."
"So you were less than six weeks?" He asked ignoring what I said earlier and sat up again.
"Five weeks, two days." I smiled slightly. "Harry's birthday."
"Oh." He smiled, probably remembering that night. Or at least tried to remember. We were more than wasted. Louis woke up naked in the bathtub and I was in our bedroom wrapped in our curtains. To say the least, Niall and Eleanor about pissed themselves when they came looking for us the next morning. "That was a good night." He nodded. "Or what I suppose was a good night."
"Mhmm." I hummed pushing him back down and trailed a series of kisses from his chin, to his jaw and down his torso, before I began fumbling with the button of his jeans. “Shh. Let me take your pants off.”
"Babe, I don't have anything."
"Top draw." I smiled kissing his hip, then stopped and looked up quickly. "Shit."
"What if they expired?"
"I can always pull out." He smiled leaning up and pulled me up his body before flipping us over.
“And ruin my bed sheets?” I looked up at him.
“I… but… fuck.” He sighed laying his forehead on my chest.
“I’m kidding.” I giggled running my fingers through his hair again. “Please let’s get this a move on.”
“Is that what kids are saying these days? This?” He looked up at me with amusement all over his face.
“No.” I smiled. “I don’t know. I just miss you and…”
“Want me?” He finished for me.
“Isn’t it obvious?” I asked quietly.
“Don’t get all shy on me now, Parker.” He whispered nudging my nose with his.
“You’re making me feel like you’re stalling.” I whispered moving my head to the side.
“Because I am.” He said lifting a hand to my chin and made me look at him. “I don’t want you to stop me.”
“I won’t.” I practically whined out desperately. “I swear I want you now and until the day I die. I…” I stopped as I felt a tear fall to my ear. Crying. Again. Awesome. “I’m sure I want this and you.”
“Okay.” He smiled wiping my face. “I’m sorry I keep making you cry.”
“I’m sorry.” He apologised and sat up, between my legs, with a deep frown on his face. “It’s not like I try to make you cry.”
“I know.” I whispered wrapping my leg around the back of his thigh and tried to pull him back to me, but he didn’t budge. “Babe, it’s okay.” I unwrapped myself from him again and got to my knees in front of him and wrapped my arms around him. “Just know, if you do not take those pants off, so I can slap your bum, in .2 seconds, I will scream and go take a shower and help myself.” I smiled and watched him snort out a laugh. “Believe it or not, sometimes you are supposed to make me cry. We’ll get over everything sooner or later.” I said pushing some of his hair back as his hands wrapped around me tightly.
“What if we don’t? What if I don’t?”
“Then what we’ve been telling ourselves isn’t true, but I believe I’m supposed to be with you. Seeing how I was without you…” I stopped and blew air up my face. “I was a wreck. I’m not sure I could go another night without you and I don’t want to find out if I could. You. Got. Me.”
“And I’m not letting you go, either.” He spoke so sincerely, it gave me goosebumps.
“Then show me what you do to the one you’ll never let go.” I smiled, like the little devil I am, just to have him grab the back of my thighs and throw me back onto the bed and quickly rip my leggings off me. “Not to aggravate you, but this is how it was supposed to happen whenever we first got onto this bed.” I said just to hear him growl and get off the bed. But before I could whine out, he unzipped his pants and pushed not just his pants, but his briefs down his legs before getting back on the bed and pushing my legs apart.
“We’re skipping foreplay.” He said before licking his hand and rubbing himself before moving in between my legs.
“Do what you please, baby.” I teased opening my legs further for him and threw my head back waiting for him to push in.
“This isn’t going to be how I want it.” He grunted and pushed in and had to freeze his movements. “Damnit, Teddy. Never again. God you’re so fucking tight.”
“Either that, or you grew. Try to move.” I laughed half heartedly and breathed in a sharp breath when he did. “Okay, not yet.”
“You haven’t been enjoying yourself while you’ve been alone, have you, Bear?” He smiled down at me.
“What’s the point when I can just have you?” I smiled wrapping my arms around him and pulled him down to me so I could kiss him. “Try again.” I whispered against his lips and felt him pull out slowly, just to push back in and sigh out in relief. “We have two weeks to make up for, don’t use all of your energy.”
“She actually said that?”
“No, I’m making it up so you’ll be even more pissed off at her.” He rolled his eyes with a smile.
“It’s nice to know you threw her out.” I smiled and kissed his chest.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, so she had no right to say anything about you. At least not in that way.” He shook his head and moved his hand up and down my spine.
We made love twice. Pretty much one after another and both times, Louis didn’t pull out. I wouldn’t let him. I know he hates pulling out, and this time wouldn’t be any different, even though he protested, both times. I wouldn’t ask him to pull out any other time, so why should I ask him now? I was told you can’t get pregnant right away after having a miscarriage and I believe it. And if I can, what happens, happens.
As of now, we’re just laying in bed, he’s on his back, with an arm around me and the other behind his head like it was earlier, while I’m on my stomach, half on him and half on the bed, but I think my bigger half is on him. I’ve missed the feeling of his skin pressed up against mine, so forgive me if I take what I can get while I can before my parents get back and our clothes have to be thrown back on before my father finds out we had sex in his house.
“What are we going to do about her?” I asked after some time. “We can’t just ignore her.”
“When Shay comes, we’ll talk and do it just for Shay, other than that, I don’t care.”
“Don’t be so bitter.” I sighed. “She’s carrying your daughter, forgive her if she’s a little pissed your full attention hasn’t been on her and Shayla.”
“That doesn’t give her the right to say what she did.” He shook his head. “I… I just don’t want to talk about it. Not now. Not after that.”
“Okay.” I smiled closing my eyes and remembering how he felt, how I felt whenever he drove me into ecstasy, how it felt feeling his warmth. Just everything about being with him has given me my spark back. I don’t see my life as a black hole anymore and it’s all because of him. He makes everything seem brighter. He makes me feel like I’m worth millions, whenever I’m actually worth nothing.
“I know it's hard to find someone to hold you all night long
I can't deny you are the one but it's tearing me apart.” The sound of my phone going off knocked me out of my thoughts, making me jump slightly and Louis to laugh before reaching over to get it.
“Answer it.” I rolled my eyes.
“Hello?” He answered then laughed. “I got here this morning, mate…. She’s right here. Hence to why I’m answering…. That’s none of your business.” Ooh, someone must of asked if we just shagged. I’m guilty for laughing. “She has a brain, so I’m sure she knows what you just asked about.”
“Yup.” I laughed again and rolled over onto my other side. “What does he want?”
“To see if you’d pick up your phone.” Lou answered. “Why have you been ignoring him?”
“I’ve been ignoring everyone since I got here.” I shrugged and hugged my pillow.
“Right. That’s my fault, mate…. Most likely tomorrow. She said we could leave, but who knows, she might want to be with her parents a little longer.” I love this kid. “You’ll be the first she calls…”
“I’m calling Perrie before I think of his curly, stupid arse.” I huffed.
“Forget that, she’s calling Perrie first.” He laughed. “He says love you too.”
“Mhmm.” I hummed.
“She’s about to fall asleep, we’ll talk to you later… Fuck off.” He huffed and tapped my phone loudly.
“Someone told you to take it easy on me, didn’t he?” I giggled.
“Yes.” He huffed and moved up against me and held me. “Do you want me to get you clothes?”
“Do you want me to text your mum to tell them they can come back?”
“I guess.” I sighed and held my hand up for my phone.
“I got it.” He said kissing my shoulder before grabbing my phone again and moving it in front of me as he text my mum.
You two can come back from your ‘dinner and a movie’ now
We’ve been home for an hour. Good to know you and Louis made up. Good night, you two.
“Oh my God!” I squealed hiding my face behind my hands and dug my head into my pillow.
“At least I’m not being buried in the back garden at the moment.” He laughed.
“This is not funny!”
“So they heard us.” He shrugged. “No matter how hard you try, you never can be quite.”
this chicka's story is numba oneeeeeeeeeee :)
half of me feels bad because Dark is an excellent story, but ayyyyye this is number one :D
small FYI in advance, just so i don't get yelled at by any of you at the time it happens
there's not going to be any drama between Louis and Teddy for a good... three months(?)
but it's not anything major, so don't worry and run off and be mad at me again
everything will be fine. it'll be a minor thing(s)
so relax to know there's going to be a lot (i hope) of chapters being filled with no Leddy drama :D
what do you all think about the new banner?
there's the actual one
a reader on 1DFF.com made it for me :)
i love it and keep staring at it because it's perfect
i can't wait to see what she makes for the sequel because i know what's happening and you don't
speaking of the sequel, what do you think the title should be?
i haven't thought of any yet and it's close, but not really close to being in production
throw ideas at me if you want
anyways, enough of that
tell me what you think of this not suspected chapter
and you awesome people keep being awesome :) xxxxxxxxxx