When You Let Your Heart Win
“Because I’m watching the sun set.” I smiled whenever I felt him sit behind me and kiss my shoulder.
“And watching the sunset means your surroundings need to be silent?”
“Because voices ruin the view.” I giggled.
“So I can go jump on the bed and it’d be okay?”
“No.” I laughed. “Sh.”
“Okay.” He laughed laying his chin on my shoulder and leaned us back.
Cambodia is beautiful. I cannot say it enough. Cambodia. Is. Beautiful.
“Can we never leave?”
“We have to, babe.” He sighed. “I have to get back to…”
“Eleanor.” I huffed. “Yeah, I know.”
“I meant the boys.” He whispered. “But also that. Mainly Shay.”
“I don’t think I can get through the next four months.” I whispered and slid down his body some.
“Yes you can.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I won’t be able to.”
“I’ll be there, so yes you can.” He whispered pulling me back up his body. “You’ve gotten through everything this far.”
“You can do it, Bear. I’m right here.”
“I’m sorry.” I whispered.
“Always bringing this up and pretty much making you pull me back to you.” I sighed. “I hope you don’t think I’m going to get up and leave.”
“I do think that.” He whispered and I pretty much broke. “I know this is hurting you more than you’re letting me see. I’m terrified you’re going to break and leave.”
“But I won’t.” I said, with a little whine, and turned around and looked at him. “I know it hurts now, but if I leave, it’ll hurt more.”
“Then I’ll be here to help you.” He smiled pulling me closer. “I do love you.”
“I know.” I smiled wrapping my arms around his neck and laid my forehead against his. “I love you just as much.”
“Highly doubt that.”
“Don’t start with that!” I complained.
“Yeah, because you know I’ll win.” He laughed.
“Mmhm.” He rolled his eyes. “Are you going to get ready or are you going to continue to sit here?”
“Do we really have to go to the island’s gathering?” I slumped.
“It’s something different, babe.” He smiled.
“Why can’t we just stay here and have our own party?” I asked as seductive as I could and straddled his waist.
“Because I’d like to watch you dance all night then hear you scream into the new year.” He smiled pulling me even closer.
“Can I just scream all night?”
“No.” He laughed wrapping his arms around me and stood up.
“Where are you taking me?”
“Taking us.” He snorted.
“Okay, I’ll rephrase.” I rolled my eyes. “Where are you taking us?”
“To the bathroom.”
“Because you’re going to get in the shower and get ready.”
“And if I want you to join me?”
“Then I’ll join you.” He smiled placing me on the bathroom counter then went to start the shower.
“Are we going to do stuff in the shower?” I bit my lip as he bent over some.
“Do you want to do stuff in the shower?” He asked turning to look at me.
“Baby, your bum looks good in those briefs.” I giggled.
“When do you ever not think my bum looks good?” He laughed pushing my legs apart and stood between them.
“Never.” I sighed. “I have a sexy boyfriend with a sexy bum.”
“And I have a sexy girlfriend with a sexy body.” He whispered close to my lips as he grabbed the sides of my underwear and slid them slowly down my legs.
“Oh really?” I giggled as he tossed my underwear over his shoulder.
“Mhmm.” He nodded reaching behind my back and unclasped my bra and threw it over his shoulder as well.
“Why am I always the first one naked?” I sighed snapping his briefs.
“I get to see you naked faster.” He responded like it was nothing.
“I should’ve known.” I huffed playfully as I lifted my feet to his waist and started to push his briefs, that are now tightly fitted, down his legs. “That always amazes me.” I bit my lip and pulled him in close. “You like that you can make me blush and I like that you get hard quickly.”
“I just have to look at you and I’m hard.”
“Let’s go get married.”
“Please?” I smiled.
“You’re drunk.” He laughed.
“No I’m not.”
“Babe, yes you are.”
“I don’t care.” I shook my head. “Let’s go get married.”
“Yes we can.” I smiled grabbing his hand and shaking it like a mad person. “When I found out we were coming here, I looked up what we could do here and getting married is one.”
“Louis, let’s do it.”
“How about tomorrow whenever you’re sober?”
“You don’t want to marry me?”
“Do you really have to ask me that?” He asked pulling me into him closely.
“You’re saying no.” I whispered.
“Bear, I want to marry you so bad, but you’re drunk.”
“A drunk person spea…”
“Speaks a sober’s heart.” He smiled cutting me off. “You told me.”
“You remember that?” I smiled.
“Bear, I remember probably everything that has to deal with you.” He laughed.
“Ditto.” I stared at him, basically pleading with him.
“No.” He shook his head.
“You’re drunk, you’re not thinking properly, no.”
“What can I do to change your mind?” I whispered.
“Tomorrow, if you still think this is what you want, then I’ll consider it.” He sighed.
“Consider?” I frowned.
“Teddy, if you were 100% sober right now, I’d drag you to the first person who’d marry us…”
“Then let’s just go.” I cut him off. “We can just rip up the paper or get an annulment if I change my mind tomorrow.”
“Give me a better reason then.” I argued. “Name one reason, other than ‘you’re too drunk, you’re not thinking properly,’ then I’ll let it go.”
“Teddy…” He stopped and sighed. “I don’t have another reason.”
“Then let’s go.”
“Say it then.” I growled at him.
“Say that you really don’t want to marry me.” I huffed.
“I… Teddy, why are you assuming that?” He growled.
“Because you don’t want to marry me!” I yelled. “Just say it!”
“No.” He shook his head. “We’re not doing this right now.”
“End of discussion.”
Ouch to my ego and an even bigger ouch to my heart.
“You’re an arse.” I whispered pushing him back before I spun around and pushed through drunk, dancing bodies.
“Teddy?” He yelled over the music, but I ignored him. “Excuse me… Teddy, stop.”
“I’m going back to our room.” I shook him off whenever he finally caught my arm.
“Bear, stop.” He grabbed me slightly harder and spun me around. “Why are you crying?”
“Because you don’t wan…”
“God dammit, babe, yes I do!” He yelled then looked around and saw we grew an audience. “I really, really do. I just don’t want you to marry you wi…”
“Then what’s stopping us?” I whined. “Me being drunk has nothing to do with it.”
“I want to do this right.” He sighed. “I want us both to be ready for it. I want to plan everything out and surprise you with whatever ring I get you. I don’t want to marry you right now because you are in fact drunk and because you wouldn’t want to be married to me right now.”
“You don’t know that.” I whispered.
“I also don’t want to marry you right now, because let’s say you do reach your breaking point and leave, we’ll have to go through a divorce.”
“I don’t care.” I whispered fisting his shirt.
“I’m not going to change your mind am I?” He sighed with a small smile.
“No.” I shook my head.
“When we get back, we’re doing this correctly.” He threw his head back and sighed loudly then looked me head on. “I’m buying you a ring and you’re planning a wedding.”
“This is just for us.”
“So you’re saying…”
“Let’s go find someone…” He started but I jumped on him and cut him off.
“Really?” I whispered looking at him.
“I can’t change your mind.” He smiled.
“I don’t want you to do this just for me.” I frowned.
“I’m not.” He smiled picking me up. “I want this, I just wanted to do this right. Hint to the reason why I’m getting you a ring and you’re planning a wedding for our family.”
“Really?” I smiled.
“You’re going to marry me? Right now?”
“If we continue to stand here, no.” He laughed whenever I sat, I guess, up straighter and pushed at him.
“Let’s go.” I smiled grabbing his hand and dragging him away from the crowd.
This is going to happen.
And I’m not one ounce nervous about this.
I want to marry him.
I want everything with him.
sorry it's short
and sorry that i'm now just updating
i procrastinate a lot
it's a curse
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throw predictions at me
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