Try and Keep Me Down
Four
I nervously picked at the plate of food in front of me, willing myself to disappear.
All of the guys were looking at me and I felt like crawling under the table. I liked being the center of attention, I always had since I was a little kid. But this was different. They stared straight into my eyes. It was silent until Harry cleared his throat.
“So we have rules we need to lay down.” I raise an eyebrow, amused. Let’s just say I wasn’t having the kindest of feelings towards him right now. For one, when I had walked in, he had snapped about how long it had taken me to get down here. And now he has rules? This bastard fucking kidnaps me and expects me to follow his rules? He really doesn’t know me.
“First off, no escape attempts. I say attempts because we all know there’s no way you’ll make it far.” I let out a quite unlady like snort. I was the best at plotting. That’s why I was second in the gang I was in. I’m manipulative and when I got my psych degree I would be even more so.
His eyes narrow as he moves on.
“Secondly, do whatever the lads and I say. If we say ‘Jump.’ You say ‘How high?’ got it?”
I look away from his steely gaze, shaking my head. This man was truly insane.
I hear a chair scrape against the tile and my eyes snap to the tall frame stalking towards me. He unusually large hands trap my face between his palms as he looks directly into my eyes.
“Thirdly, never look away when I’m talking to you. There will be consequences if you do.” Maybe it’s just because I truly am an idiot or maybe I just have an unrealized death wish, but something possessed me to mockingly say,
“What kind of consequences? It’s not like you’ll hit me.” A sharp pain and an imprint of his hand on my cheek prove otherwise.
“Niall said that, not me.” And it was in that moment I truly realized how much shit I was in.
I have a problem with facing my problems head on. I’ll usually tiptoe around the problem until a decision was necessary. But this-this was another thing entirely. This wasn’t something I could lie or twist my way out of. This wasn’t a missing assignment or failing a test, this was my life. They could do whatever they liked with me and I had no power to stop them. None at all. None.
The realization sinks in as they all look at me with unwavering, unapologetic stares.
They could kill me.
I slump against the chair, all the fight leaving me.
“Do you understand?” Harry hisses, still gripping my face.
“Yes.” I mumble, looking at the ground.
Another slap.
“What did I say about not looking me in the eyes?” I raise my head proudly, staring straight into his unflinching eyes.
“Yes, I understand.” He searches my face for a moment, trying to see any sign of resistance. Not finding any, he releases his grip.
“Good.” He moves back to his seat, and dinner resumes. I shove my plate away, not very hungry anymore.
“Eat.” Liam commands, pushing the plate back towards me.
“I’m not hungry.” I say, rising from my seat to go to my room.
“Did we say you could leave?” Louis asks from his seat across the table. I have a sharp retort on the tip of my tongue but I hold it back knowing that I’d gotten in enough trouble today.
I take a deep breath, sitting back down.
“Good girl.” Harry chimes and I find I have trouble holding back tears at his “compliment”. As sarcastic as it was, it still had an effect on me. No one had ever told me that I was good before. I’d always been told that I wasn’t doing good enough, that I wasn’t trying hard enough, that I wouldn’t ever be enough.
“Are you crying?” A british voice asks from across this wretched table.
“Hey- answer Zayn.” Curly demands and I look up to face them both, tears silently rolling down my face.
“Yeah, I’m crying.” I say, angrily wiping away the tears.
“Why?” Niall asks and I find myself softening at the little Irishman. He was the sweetest of them I had determined. He had yet to say a cruel thing or act hostile towards me.
“Because I’ve had a pretty rough day.”
Harsh chuckles came from around the room.
“May I leave now?” They all seem surprised at my question.
“But you haven’t eaten yet.” Protested Liam. What was with him and this damn food?
“I’m just not very hungry right now.” Lie. I was starving, but I refused to let that show.
“Kennedy, eat.” Harry says, glaring at me with that awful stare of his.
“Please don’t make me eat. I’ll only get sick. Whenever I get upset my appetite goes away. If I’m forced to eat it’ll all just come back up.”
His eyes visibly soften and I find myself thinking how amazing it was. Curly actually had a heart!
“Fine. But don’t try to escape. All the windows and doors are locked so it’s pointless.”
I push myself up from the table.
“Okay.”
I made my way back to my room, curling up in a ball as soon as I sat on the bed. Then I did something I haven’t done in a really long time; I cried my heart out.
All of the guys were looking at me and I felt like crawling under the table. I liked being the center of attention, I always had since I was a little kid. But this was different. They stared straight into my eyes. It was silent until Harry cleared his throat.
“So we have rules we need to lay down.” I raise an eyebrow, amused. Let’s just say I wasn’t having the kindest of feelings towards him right now. For one, when I had walked in, he had snapped about how long it had taken me to get down here. And now he has rules? This bastard fucking kidnaps me and expects me to follow his rules? He really doesn’t know me.
“First off, no escape attempts. I say attempts because we all know there’s no way you’ll make it far.” I let out a quite unlady like snort. I was the best at plotting. That’s why I was second in the gang I was in. I’m manipulative and when I got my psych degree I would be even more so.
His eyes narrow as he moves on.
“Secondly, do whatever the lads and I say. If we say ‘Jump.’ You say ‘How high?’ got it?”
I look away from his steely gaze, shaking my head. This man was truly insane.
I hear a chair scrape against the tile and my eyes snap to the tall frame stalking towards me. He unusually large hands trap my face between his palms as he looks directly into my eyes.
“Thirdly, never look away when I’m talking to you. There will be consequences if you do.” Maybe it’s just because I truly am an idiot or maybe I just have an unrealized death wish, but something possessed me to mockingly say,
“What kind of consequences? It’s not like you’ll hit me.” A sharp pain and an imprint of his hand on my cheek prove otherwise.
“Niall said that, not me.” And it was in that moment I truly realized how much shit I was in.
I have a problem with facing my problems head on. I’ll usually tiptoe around the problem until a decision was necessary. But this-this was another thing entirely. This wasn’t something I could lie or twist my way out of. This wasn’t a missing assignment or failing a test, this was my life. They could do whatever they liked with me and I had no power to stop them. None at all. None.
The realization sinks in as they all look at me with unwavering, unapologetic stares.
They could kill me.
I slump against the chair, all the fight leaving me.
“Do you understand?” Harry hisses, still gripping my face.
“Yes.” I mumble, looking at the ground.
Another slap.
“What did I say about not looking me in the eyes?” I raise my head proudly, staring straight into his unflinching eyes.
“Yes, I understand.” He searches my face for a moment, trying to see any sign of resistance. Not finding any, he releases his grip.
“Good.” He moves back to his seat, and dinner resumes. I shove my plate away, not very hungry anymore.
“Eat.” Liam commands, pushing the plate back towards me.
“I’m not hungry.” I say, rising from my seat to go to my room.
“Did we say you could leave?” Louis asks from his seat across the table. I have a sharp retort on the tip of my tongue but I hold it back knowing that I’d gotten in enough trouble today.
I take a deep breath, sitting back down.
“Good girl.” Harry chimes and I find I have trouble holding back tears at his “compliment”. As sarcastic as it was, it still had an effect on me. No one had ever told me that I was good before. I’d always been told that I wasn’t doing good enough, that I wasn’t trying hard enough, that I wouldn’t ever be enough.
“Are you crying?” A british voice asks from across this wretched table.
“Hey- answer Zayn.” Curly demands and I look up to face them both, tears silently rolling down my face.
“Yeah, I’m crying.” I say, angrily wiping away the tears.
“Why?” Niall asks and I find myself softening at the little Irishman. He was the sweetest of them I had determined. He had yet to say a cruel thing or act hostile towards me.
“Because I’ve had a pretty rough day.”
Harsh chuckles came from around the room.
“May I leave now?” They all seem surprised at my question.
“But you haven’t eaten yet.” Protested Liam. What was with him and this damn food?
“I’m just not very hungry right now.” Lie. I was starving, but I refused to let that show.
“Kennedy, eat.” Harry says, glaring at me with that awful stare of his.
“Please don’t make me eat. I’ll only get sick. Whenever I get upset my appetite goes away. If I’m forced to eat it’ll all just come back up.”
His eyes visibly soften and I find myself thinking how amazing it was. Curly actually had a heart!
“Fine. But don’t try to escape. All the windows and doors are locked so it’s pointless.”
I push myself up from the table.
“Okay.”
I made my way back to my room, curling up in a ball as soon as I sat on the bed. Then I did something I haven’t done in a really long time; I cried my heart out.
8/24/13