I feel so stupid sitting here in my bed crying over a dream. But it is more than a dream. It is going to happen. Not just like that, of course; but I will have to leave Harry. And he will date someone else. How could I ever expect him not too? Talk about the worst long distance relationship ever.

As I continue to half-sit up in my bed, I start to think. About myself. About Harry. About how close we have become, how much he knows about me, and how much I have opened up. But how much do I know about him? Nothing much, really. Are his parents divorced? Does he have any sibling?

The more I think about it, the more curious I am. I really care about Harry, and despite the immense amount of pain that leaving him will cause me, I want to find out as much as I can about him. I want to get to know him as well as I possibly can.

But why? Why would I want that when I know it will only cause me more pain than I will already have?

Maybe I am a masochist.

I need to calm down. I begin to take deep breaths as I wipe away my tears. It is raining outside. Really bad, actually. With thunder and lightning. I guess that explains that part of my dream.

I get out of bed and wash my face with a towel. I don’t feel like changing, so I stay in my pajamas. I walk down to the kitchen and see that it is 10:45. I begin to search for something to eat. That is, until the phone rings. Because only Harry and my mother know the number, I know exactly who it is.

“Hello." I say. Anyone could obviously tell that I had just gotten up by the way my voice sound.

“Good morning, sleepy head!" For some reason I wasn’t prepared for the sound of his deep and raspy morning voice. Between that and my dream, I find myself almost choked up as I reply,

“You sound like you just woke up like me."

“That’s because I did." He says with a laugh. “Well, I’ve been up for about thirty minutes, but whatever. Anyway, I was just wondering…do you want to hang out today? Like…at your house?"

Well, that is pretty convenient.

I walk over to the window above the sink and look outside. “I’d love to. But you do realize that you’re going to get soaked, right?" He begins to laugh before saying, “Yeah…I know. But I’m fine with it. Plus, you’re worth it. And I’ve lived in England my whole life so I’m basically use to the rain."

“Good point. When are you coming over? Now?" I ask as I walk up to my bedroom to change. “Yeah, if you’re ready for me to."

“I’ll need just a while to change. Start coming over in about…fifteen minutes." I say as I begin to search through my closet. “Alright. Sounds good." He replies.

“Wait!" I say hurriedly. “Are you going to walk? I could just pick you up." He thought a moment before saying, “I mean…I was going to walk, but…"

“I’ll pick you up. See you in fifteen minutes." I say interrupting him. “Thanks. See you in fifteen minutes."

After hanging up, I quickly pick my outfit. I end up choosing some light colored jeans, a Jack Wills t-shirt, and a blue jacket with a hood. For shoes, I wear some really cute sneakers.

As I run down the stairs after realizing I had taken at least twelve minutes already, I grab two umbrellas. I pull the hood over my head and step out. I hurriedly open one of the umbrellas and make a fast dash to the car. As soon as I get inside, I shudder. It is quite cold.

By the time I get to Harry’s house, I had taken about seventeen minutes. I pulled up beside his house and parked. I waited for only a few second when I saw Harry running to the car. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Aaaah, it is so cold!" Harry exclaimed as he got in the car. “Tell me about it." I reply as I put the car out of park and begin to drive.

Once we are at my house and ready to make our way inside, we run as fast as we can. The umbrellas didn’t help much; the wind plus our running just caused the rain to hit us more.
As soon as we’re inside, (the main house this time) we burst out laughing. “You…you are so soaked." Harry said. “I am? Look at yourself!" I say as I point to his completely soaked jacket.

“That is why I was smart and wore this under it." He then takes off his jacket to reveal a long sleeve shirt. It is green and looks very soft. “Good thinking. I was smart too." I say as I reveal my shirt.

“Nice shirt, I like it." He says as he hangs his jacket up on the coat rack. “Thanks." I say while taking off my now soaked shoes. “You can put your shoes right there too." After he does, we make our way to the kitchen. We end up cooking some breakfast. Yes, we are cooking breakfast at 11:30.

“Harry! Don’t! You need to…just give the whisk to me!" I commanded. “But I know what I’m doing! Leave me alone!" Harry says in a whiny little kid voice. “But you are doing it too slow!"

“I know exactly what I am doing, thank you very much. I guarantee that these will be the best scrambled eggs you have ever had in your entire life. Now go back to the bacon. I got this."
Despite his orders, I continue to stand there with my hands on my hips.

“Megan…don’t make me do it." I don’t move an inch. “Megan…I’m warning you…" Still, I do not move. He takes the pan of eggs off the stove top and turns to stare me down. His look is suppose to be serious and threatening, but instead of doing what he told me, I just crack a smile.

“Alright…but don’t say I didn’t warn you." He says. Just as I begin to ask what he was going to do, Harry traps me in a corner, (the corner where the sink is) and begins to tickle me.
Between laughing hysterically, I manage to say, “Stop…please….Harry…I can’t…breathe!" But he doesn’t stop. “Tell me you’re sorry." He says.

“I’m sorry!" I manage to say after more laughter. “Tell me that I am the best scrambled egg maker in the entire world." Again, I manage to repeat it. “And…will you let me finish making the eggs while you finish the bacon that is probably burned by now because I can smell it?"

“Oh my gosh, yes, I promise!" He finally stops, but still keeps me trapped in the corner. He gives me an accomplished smile and I can’t help but smile back. “Jerk." I say.

“Oh, shut up. You know you liked it." He says as he leans in to kiss me. I swear, each kiss seems better than the last. “Better get back to those eggs, Chief Styles." After I cooked some more bacon, Harry finished the eggs, and after we made some toast and got a muffin each, it was finally time to eat.

“It’s only…12:30." Harry says as we eat our breakfast in my room. We are sitting on the floor by my window and are using the window seat to set our drinks on. Once we are finished eating, it is still pouring down rain. I keep my plate on the floor and set my mugs on it. I then sit on the window seat and look outside. Harry does the same.

“Harry…tell me more about you." I say as I watch the rain drops fall down the window seal. I love rain. The way it looks. The way it sounds. I guess England is a pretty good place for me to live.

I look over at Harry who has a small smile on his face. “What do you want to know?" He asks. “Everything." I reply.

He lets out a sigh as he runs his fingers through his curly hair. “Well…let’s see…I was born on a cold England morning on the first of February. At 3:19, to be exact. And…"

“Come on Harry, be serious." I say with a laugh. “What? I am being serious! Whatever, anyway, I was born in Evesham, Worcestershire. Me and my family moved to Cheshire when I was four. The when I was ten we moved to London.

My parents are still married. I have an older brother named Elijah. He’s three years older than me so…he’s twenty. He goes to a university. He is an amazing football player. Always has been. So is my younger brother, Greyson. He is fourteen."

“What about you?" I ask. “Do you like football?" He laughs. “No…no…I am absolutely horrible. Although according to my parents, it’s just because I don’t try hard enough. Honestly…I feel like they are disappointing that I’m not good at football. It’s like…just because my brothers are good at it, they expect me to be too. I mean, I know that being good at a sport would help me get a scholarship to a university; that’s what my brother did, but I can’t help it. I suck. Besides, that’s not what I’m interested in."

I took the opportunity to ask, “What are you interested in?" He paused a moment and looked outside. “It’s stupid, really."

“Don’t say that. It’s not stupid." I say. He looks over at me. “Promise you won’t laugh?" I nod my head and reply, “I promise."

“To be honest…my passion has always been…music. I love to sing. But my parents don’t approve whatsoever. They say that there is no way I could make a career out of it. That I should figure out something that I want to do that is more realistic. I know that they’re right but…"
Before he can finish his sentence, I wrap my arms around him and pull him in for a hug.

As I rest my head on his shoulder, I say, “Do not say that. Your dream is not stupid. You can do whatever you want. You can be whatever you want. And do you know why?" I pull away enough to look at him. Our faces our mere inches apart. “Because you my dear, are amazing."

I could almost swear that I saw Harry’s eyes water as he said, “Thank you, Megan. So are you."
He then pulls me in for another long, tight hug before kissing me on the cheek. “So, anything else you want to tell me?" I ask. “Umm…yes, actually." He pauses a moment to take a sip of his coffee.

“I’m not popular. I’m sure you’ve figured that out by now. My brothers however, are the complete opposite. They both have a better social life than I do. I guess you could say I am a bit of a loner. Not that I’ve always been that way. I use to be different when I was younger. More outgoing, had more friends. I still do, just don’t see them as often. We see each other during the summer and we talk a lot. But I really do miss them. We were friends when I was four. But then when I moved when I was ten, we got separated. They still see each other, of course. Still go to the same school and everything."

I quickly interrupt and ask, “Are they seventeen like you?"

“No. Liam and Niall are a few months older than me. They are both eighteen. Zayn is nineteen and Louis is twenty. They are both out of high school. They’re just like brothers to me. I haven’t seem them in a while. I really do miss them. You know…you really should meet them. I really want you to."

I smiled as I replied, “I would love to." Great, more people to get attached to then never see again.

“Anyway, back to me being a loner. My parents do not approve whatsoever. Like your mom. It’s like…they think there is something wrong with me. Again, it’s like they expect me to be just like Elijah and Greyson."

“I know how you feel." I say. “About the thinking there is something wrong with you thing…I swear my mom thinks I need mental help or something."

“Same." Harry replies. He continues and says, “I just…I just don’t understand it. Why can’t parents just accept their kid for who they are? It makes no sense to point out everything they think is ‘wrong’ with them. It’s like…what kind of results do you expect to get from that kind of approach? Do they think that their child will just magically change who they are? How they act? How they feel?"

This. This is exactly what I wanted. Getting to know Harry better was even more amazing than I thought it would be. Yet heart breaking at the same time. I thought I was the only one who had it bad, but so does he. And with him, you can’t really tell. That gets old. Acting like you are alright. Putting on a strong face. I should know.

But it is also nice. It’s nice to have someone understand how you feel. It’s nice to know that you are not the only one who feels the way you do. It is nice to know that you are not alone.

For now anyway.

No, I will not allow myself to go there.

So instead of bursting into tears over my inevitable future, I take full control of the present and try to not waste a single moment of it.

I make my way to Harry who has his back leaned against the wall. He has one leg underneath him and the other hanging off the side of the window seat. I wrap my arms around his waist as I half lay down and rest my head on his chest. He wraps his arms around my back and rests his head on mine.

I close my eyes as I listen to his heartbeat. The rain has lightened up and the thunder has as well. Once again I feel the calm, safe, and peaceful feeling that comes over me every time I am in his arms. This is another moment that I wish would never end. A moment I never will forget. I once again take pictures in my mind in order to remember this moment better; despite how painful these memories will be one day.

With the combination of how late I was up last night, the comforting sound of the rain and Harry’s heartbeat, and the warmth of being in his arms, I slowly began to drift away from reality. But before I was completely gone, I could hear Harry lightly humming a song. I tried to make it out, but I had never heard of it before. That or I was just too half asleep to figure it out. Either way, it only added to the perfectness of this moment. The last thing I remember before falling asleep was realizing that the rain had completely stopped.

I didn’t sleep long. It especially didn’t seem like it. It’s like it happened in a blink of an eye. One minute I am aware of the rain stopping, then in the next I realize that my mother’s car is parked in the driveway.