My Faults..

Valerie's P.O.V.

I watched Louis imitate Chrissy Doll's voice. That. That just ripped me. He's pulling a prank on me? This wasn't even funny! And.. he's not done. And with that, I faced Zayn who was looking at me deep in thought. He opened his mouth to say something but stopped and shook his head. Pity? No! He knows better than to pity me. "If you have something to say, Zayn... don't hold back out of pity." My voice shook as I said that. I glanced down at the doll on the floor where Louis dropped her. Zayn followed my gaze and sighed heavily, picking her up. I backed up from him instinctively.

"Valerie? What happened? Do you remember anything before passing out?" he asked me gently. I passed out? Since when... My thoughts cut short as everything from the past hour or so had rushed back into my mind. Yes.. I did black out..


Zayn's P.O.V.

I watched her think in confusion when finally, realisation set in her facial expression. It's small moments like these when she doesn't notice me staring at her. I mentally shook my head. You can't think like that, moron. And stop staring like a pervert.

Valerie's voice cut my thoughts short as she asked, "Do you really want to know what happened? 'Cause if you're just here to bludge through how I feel, you can join Louis." She pointed towards the door. I looked down at the doll. Geez, she's kinda creepy... such empty eyes.. I shuddered at that. She watched me and snatched the doll from me, throwing her on the floor. "Stay away from Chrissy Doll... she's dangerous.." she said almost in a trance.

I pulled her towards me and said quietly yet sternly, as I held her close, "Tell me everything."

We cuddled there together as Valerie recounted everything which resulted in more tears. But as I watched each tear drip down, I knew that things were going to get worse in the future. I hope I'm wrong.. please get better. Please God, help her.


Valerie's P.O.V.

As night blanketed the skies with it's sparkling sequins of silver and midnight blue velvet, I sat in bed, watching Chrissy Doll. My current misery is you. "But you're the misery here, Valerie." My eyes widened at that but I decided not to panic. I picked her up roughly and inspected her flawless face. That's until her face warped back into that sick face she had earlier today before warping rapidly back to her innocent self ending it with a cheeky wink. I squeezed on her arms hard but her voice sang, "Oh, that feels so nice." Fudge off you bastard-cunt... I bitterly thought.

She began, what I thought was growling but it was a low laugh which escalated fast into a high, shrill scream.

Leave. Me. Alone. I got up quick and placed her on a chair. Out of my peripheral vision, my head snapped towards a red light, blinking in the dark corner of my room. I shook my head thinking, she's doing this to me.


But... I looked at Chrissy Doll in confusion. I thought she was Louis' prank.

"You thought wrong! Aren't you a lucky ducky, aye?"

With that, I crept under covers, my eyes peeled open the whole night knowing I would be awake for a long while.

"Hush-a-bye baby you're almost dead... " she began to sing softly. "You don't have a pulse and your pillow's red." Memories of my cutting days flashed back through my mind, my nose filled with the familiar metal-like smell of blood.

My sore eyes managed to muster up fresh tears. Zayn.. I'm scared. I wish you stayed. "Your family hates you and your friends let you bleed.." Zayn no... I sniffled quietly. "Poor baby's cwying for her dead mummy.." I clutched my stomach to keep my choked sobs silent, my eyes clamping shut as the tears flowed free.


"Nighty night, Valerie. I wuv you." Mum, I miss you... why does she do this to me when you're gone? Tell Dad I love him, for me? Louis hates me.. I'm a mistake.. Do you think I'm a mistake too? I'm sorry mum..


Sleep finally took hold of my body, cradling me. I wish I could sleep forever.

Notes