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Seriously, FML.
Looked through the forums and found the one from the night of our break up. Shaking my mother fucking head. Also found the one where I discovered he had a gf a few days after we called it quits. And when my sister wanted me to stay with her, and when I ran away and she went through my email and saw the notification for this site and told ya'll I ran away.
Damn. You guys know a lot to not know me in reality xD.
"@Call_Me_Godot @girlalmighty
He left a bit ago. Want the low down? I just sat in front of the tv (watching Dance Academy) and didn't acknowledge him, he has the spare key so I just didn't move from the couch. When he finished collecting his trash he came over and sat down next to me and said he wanted to talk, so I got up and went into the bathroom (where I silently cried for a good half hour), and I came out when I thought he left but he was still on the couch so I told him to get the fuck outta my house. To which he called me a bitch and I just needed to face it or whatever so I threatened to call the cops if he didnt leave so he grabbed my wrists and GET THIS BULLSHIT EVERYBODY, said maybe we could try again in the future and gave me a mother fucking shallow kiss on the cheek so then I broke down crying in front of him and he just walked out the door.
WHY THE HELL?!? So now I am a mess, I can't stop crying and my head is throbbing and I threw up and I don't know what's even gping on with me....."
@JustBloo.
Tell a motherfucker to get the fuck out D:< you don't just call a fucking break to fuck someone else (been there). So you don't just get to come back when you realize that person's trash (been there too). You tell Bitch Titties he wanted out so you let him out. He can't just fucking change his mind to suit his needs because what if you let him in and this shit happens again? Then he'll think all he needs to do is appologize and coming back will be as easy as that.
No drinks. Fuck him. Fuck off. No. No no no no no. Did I say no? No. Just no. You don't fucking do that. Lol this same shit (while not quite as dramatic) happened with my last boyfriend so it's kind of hitting a personal note XD but just no. That's not how shit works. Tell him to fuck off, you don't want his fucking drink. Block his number. Tell him you don't want to talk. Threaten to charge him with fucking harassment for all I care.
No.
Just no.
(fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck that.)
AND FOR THE RECORD THIS THREAD HAS ALREADY GOT ME SO BENT OUT OF SHAPE I'M DROPPING MORE F BOMBS THAN I WOULD IF I WAS SINGING ALONG TO I LOVE TO SAY FUCK. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
@Call_Me_Godot
Amen. What she said. All of it.
Do. Not. Need. Tell him he can go shave his back now. Guys like that are like a fucking disease, don't let him worm how way back in. You're incredible and deserve much better, never settle for second best and never be someone's back up plan. Fuck that.
@JustBloo.
I agree with what everyone said above. He probably realized what a mistake he made by letting you go because you're a great person, but he's not so you go find yourself someone who will treat you right.
In the meantime, we're all here to vent to and such :)
@JustBloo
I am at the same page as everyone above me! He is just an a-hole for doing that to you! He doesn't deserve your time!
@Liampayneaddict
@sugarcube.
@theodora.
@Rocker_Babe
@tkstylist
@Call_Me_Godot
First off, Godot thank you for managing to take everything that I was internally trying to word and making it a sentence. The anger, hurt, frustration and usage of fuck. Lol Sorry my life is dramatic, so is everyone's else I'm involved in and it almost seems normal.
THANK YOU LADIES ALSO! I will gladly take you up on the offer to vent so *ahem* prepare yoursleves.
I'm just now getting on the site because I shut off my phone after finding twelve unopened text messages and two missed phone calls he must've sent while I slept.
The most BS message of the day (100% copied and pasted here): "Denim I know you aren't talking to me but I want you to know that this break is killing me I was giving you the space that it looked like you needed and now I can't wait anymore I am serious about us and want to see you again I love you - your Ky"
And he's crying in a voicemail making me out to be the bad guy and how "trusting his gut ended up with me wrecking a relationship" BITCH WE ALL KNOW YOU DID NOT LEAVE FOR MY BENEFIT!! YOU LEFT TO SATISFY YOURSELF AND I'M NOT THE STUPID NAIVE LITTLE GIRL YOU THINK I AM!!!
And so I tell my boyfriend all of this and he gets pissed and wants to drive down to Fresno and show this jack ass what's what but instead decides to tell my sister. My sister goes all bat shit crazy and stays at my house with me all day because she's scared I'll make an irrational decision again.
And I by the way am still processing all of these bottled up emotions churning at one time. Because I don't even know if I trust myself!
I think he finds joy in hurting people because he has totally flipped the entire situation so that the split was my fault when I remember him calling it quits.
And I've had a few therapeutic sessions and can now say that he did get aggresive a few times. I denied it for forever and haven't told anyone yet really (but the impersonal Internet because that somehow has no affect on my personal life) but he's grabbed me back or gotten in my face and started screaming.
And I can't handle any of that again! Once I get in I'm not going to be able to get back out. I know myself. And that's why I don't trust myself right now.
And I don't like crying and feeling this way! Especially since I have a boyfriend that treats me wonderfully and is really all that I need right now..So now I feel guilty.
@JustBloo
A classic guy move, turning the tables around. He is just trying to get in your head, so that you will come back, if only out of guilt.
If I were you, I would block his number and whatever more you have to do, to get him out of your life because girl he is poison. He is messing with you and being pathetic and if he was abusive in some kind of way, he is the one who needs professional help. It's good that you have an amazing support system back home.
and if it gets too much just scream like your life depends on it(this always helps me, when I'm in a bad place). If I was there I would probebly give you a hug, but since I'm not, I'm just giving you a hug virtually!
And keep in mind that you are strong and that you don't need someone like that in your life.
xx
@JustBloo.
It's true, guys do love to guilt girls/women into doing things because women actually have hearts and care about other people. He sounds like the kind of person to be aggressive, and like you said, he is. He must love the feeling of control, and since you two aren't together anymore, it must be driving him crazy that he has no power of you if that makes any sense.
Boo.
Like why? Why the fuck?
So, for a few that have been on this site for a moment -or anyone that reads the old note sections of my stories (specifically "A Tale Of Two Spies")- you know I went through a hell of a bad break up only 8 months ago with my boyfriend of two and a half years.
After all of that shit, and moving from my city to live in San Diego with my sister, basically starting a new life, running away because I thought I was pregnant- insert all the other crap that I was surprisingly comfortable sharing with you all- this mother fucking narcissistic pain in the ass has the audacity to message me again!
Mind you, I am still an effed up mess. I keep my hair short because of psychological issues, and have trouble connecting with my guy of the present at times and he enters back in talking about "I don't feel like we need to take a break anymore. Meet up for a drink?" Of course I am gonna be pissed the hell off!!
You're "break" was just an excuse to hook up with someone else most likely. Because you can't commit for shit and your totally fine leaving me a sobbing wreck on the kitchen floor for my brother to find me! You didn't even show up at his funeral and honestly why did I expect him to?!?!
Because I like hurting myself probably. And reading his number almost gave me an anxiety attack which is frustrating when you think you've moved on from a relationship. And then the grief comes back and he has the AUDACITY TO SAY HE'S DONE WITH THIS BREAK?! WHAT BREAK?!?! You said we were over. You yelled at me and drove off!
And I was supposed to be done and now I'm venting on a fanfic website because my life has become that miserable. Why...the...fuck....
I swear I'm gonna hurt him. I swear....
Sorry for being a verbal processor.
1/21/16